(Closed) Spinoff: Did you invite your officiant to the rehearsal dinner?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
868 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Nope!  We had met with him twice before the ceremony.  Only the wedding party and family/friends came to the rehersal dinner.

Post # 4
6996 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: February 2011

My husbands uncle married us so he came- but we did invite the other priest as well as the deacon we did our pre-marital counseling with to both the rehearsal and the reception. The deacon and his wife declined but the other priest and my husbands uncle came to both.

I think an invite to the rehearsal would be kind but not expected.

Post # 5
6245 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

For us, yes, the officiant is my uncle (a Catholic priest) so he will definitely be coming to the rehearsal dinner. 

If I didn’t know the officiant personally, then I’d probably extend the invitation but let them decide whether to come or not.

Post # 6
5656 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2012

Yes we are inviting the pastor and his wife to our rehearsal dinner and reception. ๐Ÿ™‚

I think if I was in your situation, I probably wouldn’t invite her. 

Post # 7
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

We have met our Reverend once. We will be inviting him to the rehearsal dinner but not the wedding reception.  For us it was a matter of price.. our reception is $129 a plate… our rehearsal is $35 a plate.  Also, he’s running the rehearsal which will only be 30 minutes. It seems rude to me to pay him to come out to the rehearsal for only 30 minutes and not invite him to the meal that everyone there is going to right after.

Post # 8
14976 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Yes, but that’s cause she’s my husbands Aunt.  ๐Ÿ™‚  But if I was just meeting them for the wedding, I wouldnt.

Post # 9
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Ours will be invited to the rehearsal dinner and reception. He’s the pastor at the church Fiance grew up at, so his family knows him very well.  I don’t know if he will attend the rehearsal dinner because it will be held on a saturday, and they do saturday night services (we’re getting married Sunday).

Post # 10
2616 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

ours will be invited. but we go to the church i been going since i started dating fiance, fiance has been going for years. so i think it would be nice- plus he is marrying us for free..( we will be gifting an amount to him) his wife is also allowed to come.

in your sitauation i wouldnt invite the officant

Post # 11
795 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

We invited our priest but he declined so he could go to the big basketball game between the two Catholic high schools in our city ๐Ÿ˜› I don’t blame him, but he missed out on some mean mexican food that night. 

Post # 12
1426 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

We invited our officiant. DH’s close friend was deputized to marry us for our wedding. He and his wife were invited to our rehearsal dinner. ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 13
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

I believe we are inviting our rabbi to the rehearsal dinner but we know him and have a personal relationship with him and we’re also having a big rehearsal dinner (75-80 people). I could understand not inviting the officiant if you’re not really close with them and/or youre having a more intimate rehearsal dinner.

Post # 14
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 1997

@Future MrsB:  Is it correct etiquette if you know the Officiant, say you attend their church regularly; yes. However, a wedding Officiant you find online or whatever; no you do not. I am often invited to the rehearsal dinner, I always decline. I think it is only for officiants that are your friend, good acquaintance or you attend their church. Your rehearsal dinner is for your family and friends.

The same goes for the reception, you do not need to invite your Officiant to your reception.



Post # 15
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If the officiant is more like a vendor, a person you are just paying for their service, then you do not need to include him/her in the rehearsal dinner.  However, if you have a relationship with the officiant then it is a nice gesture.

Post # 16
4038 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

We did, and he and his wife came, but they are good friends with my ILs. 

The topic ‘Spinoff: Did you invite your officiant to the rehearsal dinner?’ is closed to new replies.

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