(Closed) Spinoff: Do any of you Bees regret having children?

posted 10 months ago in Beehive
Post # 46
Member
10664 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

oceangirl40 :  

How fortunate are we?  To be living in a time in which being child free is possible. 

There are those who will never understand our choice any more than we can understand theirs. Fair enough. If they get too wound up over it, we can remind ourselves that it’s their issue, not ours. There is some kind of psychology behind demanding that other people have children.

It wasn’t long ago that women didn’t have the choices we have. When I was nine, women didn’t have much liberty in reproductive matters yet. I was terrified of somehow ending up with a baby in me.

At 25, I asked my gyno to tie my tubes and be done with it.  Nope. He said I was too young and could change my mind.

Never happened. I knew it wouldn’t.

We’re also blessed that there are so many men these days who are secure enough in their masculinity and caring enough to get snipped. I doubt that vasectomy would have been an easy sell in previous generations. Dh is fixed, that went into the plus column.

Post # 47
Member
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I regret waiting until I was over 40 to adopt a child. If I had it to do over, I would have brought children into my life sooner and have more than one now.

Post # 48
Member
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Nope! I definitely would have regretted not having kids though. My son is just shy of 4 months and I’m amazed by him everyday. I also feel so lucky and privileged that my husband and I were able to create a life, it’s crazy,  There are aspects of my pre-child life I miss (sleeping soundly mainly), but definitely no regrets.  I’m actually already looking forward to having another…although not for a little while. 

Post # 49
Member
391 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Not at all. I have a 9 month old, and she is my joy. I do miss sleep, and I’m constantly worried about her, and I know that is going to get worse, but honestly I didn’t know being a mom would rock so hard. I’m not a natural nurturer, and I haven’t always wanted kids. I figured I would have a family, but only theoretically. I miss my relationship with my husband, but we have a new relationship dynamic that I love. I love watching him as a father, and I love who I’ve become being a mother. 

I will say that I think having them later makes a difference. I’m 4 decades deep over here, and I think mid to late 20’s would have me singing a different tune. I waited until I checked things off my bucket list and completed every adventure. That’s why I’m so ready for this adventure. 

I do want society to stop pushing a woman to breed because they have a uterus. Kudos to all you CFBC people. Your outspokenness and bravery will change the narrative. Because of you, a day will come when a woman says “I don’t want children” and no one will bat an eye or say “you’ll change your mind!”

Post # 50
Member
313 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I do not regret it, I have two boys and I want to have two more babies, currently breastfeeding and hoping to get pregnant in the next few months. 

I hate being a stay at home mom and what it hs done to me emotionally, but I love what I have been able to do with and for my kids and husband. That is the only thing I regret. Also my pregnancies are very high risk and I suffer bad through them but I still know that my babies are so worth the  few months of total hell. 

 

Post # 51
Member
200 posts
Helper bee

bibliophilacticbee :  boom! First comment nails my exact feelings. 

I would never wish my kiddo out if existence but I had never planned to have kids. I always pictured my life without one. I was working with bands and in tech, living the rock and roll lifestyle…but life had other plans and that’s ok. 

My daughter is amazing….but I know I would have been a happy gal with my life without having a child. 

Post # 52
Hostess
9624 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

Closing this for review

The topic ‘Spinoff: Do any of you Bees regret having children?’ is closed to new replies.

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