(SPINOFF) Do your men stand up to wipe?

posted 9 months ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Do you stand up or sit down to wipe after dropping friends off at the pool?
    I sit down : (38 votes)
    32 %
    I stand up : (36 votes)
    31 %
    You’re lying. People really stand up to wipe after dropping a deuce?? : (32 votes)
    27 %
    I like polls. And Doritos. Especially Cool Ranch. : (12 votes)
    10 %
  • Post # 61
    Hostess
    9553 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL

    MrsBuesleBee :  um excuse me miss, where have you been!?!?! Great to see you here. Hi!!!!

    Post # 62
    Member
    2305 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I have had this conversation before and was told that some people can’t physically (due to short arms or long torso) reach their behind without standing up, so their only option is to stand to wipe.

    It’s the same people who can’t flat hand the floor while sitting on the ground.  

     

    Post # 63
    Member
    3510 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2019 - City, State

    WHAT?! People stand to wipe?? with some of the descriptions, I’m imagning more of a lift/bend to basically just bring the butt  off the seat!?  I’m a definite sitter, although I will admit to touching water once or twice and sometimes the end of my toilet paper gets dipped & i have to get a new piece. That’s what hand soap is for! I don’t know if SO is a sitter or a barbarian… I’ll have to ask him! haha

    Also, cool ranch doritos are meh but original nacho cheese are the shiiiiiiz. And ketchup chips are amazing and I resent anyone who suggests ketchup on plain chips!! Now i want chips dammit!!

    Post # 64
    Member
    3340 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2016

    I am a stander who occasionally sits. I see both sides here.

    The reason I prefer standing is that sitting means wiping back to front, which is obviously wrong. Someone please explain- are all of these sitters wiping the wrong direction?

    And if you sitters can’t explain, I’m going to need a study done that examines UTI frequency and wiping position.

    Also, I just sent my husband out for Doritos. Thanks y’all.

    Post # 65
    Member
    523 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2016

    lovelyruby :  Reach behind you while sitting (I guess you have to lift up a tiny bit to get your hand down there, or scoot forward enough for a gap, but not stand up) and still wipe front to back.

    OP, this is the most entertaining and weird thread I have seen on the bee.. thanks for making a horrible  stressful day at work full of laughter! 

    Post # 66
    Member
    4375 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2017

    Lmao this thread is everything. I can’t imagine sitting and wiping! Can’t imagine my hand getting so close to the wasteland lol. Semi standing is where it’s at!

    Post # 67
    Member
    695 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2017

    Remember that one thread about OP’s coworker leaving streaks on the seat? I’d bet my thoroughly cleaned (while seated) ass he’s a stand-and-wiper. It all makes sense now. 

    Post # 68
    Member
    3195 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    lovelyruby :  wiping front to back doesn’t mean you literally have to wipe that direction as long as your booty hole and your urethra don’t combine bacteria. Just wipe each seperately. 

    Post # 69
    Member
    1941 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    I sit & am still able to wipe front to back 

    lovelyruby :  there is a bit of a forward lean going on to make room. 

    My 3 year old sometimes requests his diaper be changed while he stands which means I have to wipe him while he’s standing straight up (he refuses to bed). It’s incredibly difficult to get him clean!!! I have to imagine the standers are somewhat bent over 

    Post # 70
    Member
    1196 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2019

    Used to be a sitter, became a stander after a back injury and never looked back. And no you’re not standing bolt upright 😂😂😂

    Post # 71
    Member
    115 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    I stand. I have a bad shoulder/arm and find it hard to wipe while standing. I’ve always felt a bit weird about it so it’s nice to know I’m not alone!

    Post # 74
    Member
    7898 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    des- :  

    I think by ‘standing ‘ they really mean kind of stooping/hovering. Nobody stands to  attention to wipe their bum . Do they …?  

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