(Closed) Spinoff: Is it ever okay to ask for money as a wedding gift

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Is it ever okay to ask for money as a gift at your wedding?
    In your case it is okay. : (33 votes)
    30 %
    No, its never okay, its rude! : (77 votes)
    70 %
  • Post # 48
    Member
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    @engagedandinlove:  No offense, and maybe it’s because I live in the states, but 2 hours is really not that big of a deal to drive the gifts home. Most of the wedding I attend have been at least a hour away from me/the bride and groom.

    It’s never okay to ASK for money, but there are ways to hint that you want it. However, there is ALWAYS going to be that ONE person, no matter what, who will give you a gift at the wedding… and it’s always going to be a big obnoxious sized gift.

    But the best way to “ask” for money is 1) word of mouth… mother, sister, Mother-In-Law, Maid/Matron of Honor, Bridesmaid or Best Man, etc. Let them know… ladies love to talk. People will hear. 2) Do register, but only for a couple of things… people tend to see everything is bought up. 3) I don’t know if it’s just an NYC thing, or world wide, but MOST people I know give money. I don’t really know anyone who gives gifts except at the shower/engagement. It’s always some old cousin or aunt who gives the large gift at the wedding.

    Post # 50
    Member
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    OHH! Hah hah. Oops. Two hours vs. Twenty four hours…

    I would still pass around the information, but not straight out ask… You could also pass around the information to pleas have gifts shipped to your house so you don’t have to worry about it. That way your guests pay the shipping not you.

    Post # 51
    Member
    356 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I don’t even have to go through all the comments to know I will be in the minority here, because this subject comes up a lot on the board, and I am ALWAYS in the minority.

    I don’t think it’s rude to ask for money. There. I said it.

    What’s the difference between asking for a teapot/china set/toaster (which costs…MONEY) and just skipping the middle man and asking for the money directly? It’s the same thing! Your guests feel the same financial pinch either way, whether they pay their money to Macy’s or you!

    So there’s my take.

    Post # 52
    Member
    1341 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    @SupermarketGirl:  My mother is of the opinion you shouldn’t even have a registry because it’s rude and asking for gifts. While I understand where she is coming from… but I think it’s easier then ending up with 3 blenders.

    Post # 53
    Member
    356 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    @MangoSong:  That is actually the only situation that I could accept someone saying it’s not okay to ask for money…if you also don’t think it’s okay to have a registry. But if a person approves registries, I think a person should approve money!

    The topic ‘Spinoff: Is it ever okay to ask for money as a wedding gift’ is closed to new replies.

    Find Amazing Vendors