Post # 1
Member
2665 posts
Sugar bee
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
I was reading the other thread about gender reveal parties, and one of the commenters said she thought they were as obnoxious as push presents.
For those of you who don’t know, push presents are a gift from the new father to the new mother for giving birth to their child.
What do you think? Are they obnoxious?
For what it’s worth, I think it’s nice that a new dad might want to give a little something to his wife/gf/other after the birth of their child, but I cringe every time I see/hear someone say, “Oh, I’ll ask for ______ for my push present!” as if it is an expected thing and it’s okay to say what you should be getting. So, if it is a voluntary/unexpected thing from the new dad, I think it’s sweet, but I hate that it seems like women are beginning to expect it. Isn’t your new baby your push present?
Post # 3
Member
9692 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
@gingerkitten: I had never heard of this concept until the bee. However, my sister’s husband is currently desiging some custom jewellery for her. He wants to give it to her after she gives birth to their twins. I don’t think he even knows what a “push present” is and she actually thought he was cheating on her because of how secretive he was being (I made a thread about it).
I would never ask for one, but if my husband wanted to give me something nice after I gave birth to commemorate the moment then I wouldn’t complain. I don’t want a reward or trophy for it, but something meaningful to the moment would be sweet. My sister loves shiny things so I know that she will be thrilled with her gift. Her e-ring is custom made too. She’s spoiled.
Post # 4
Member
2832 posts
Sugar bee
I think the baby is gift enough. But it is a nice gesture for the mother to get a little something to show she’s appreciated. I think a lot of times the gift is just too extravagant, like a huge rock or something. I’d be happy with a trip to the day spa after things settle down a bit with the baby.
Post # 5
Member
4698 posts
Honey bee
I think the father giving the mother something sentimental like a locket or something to commemorate the day they became parents is a nice gesture. Buying her a prada bag? I don’t know, not really my thing.
Post # 6
Member
2037 posts
Buzzing bee
@gingerkitten: I had not heard of this until Jay Cutler got Kristen Cavallari a Birken Bag as a push present…LOL and I was like ‘Oh that’s a thing?’
I could see a man becoming so excited/overwhelmed with happiness and maybe wanting to make a big deal out of it.
With all gifts, I think it’s tacky when people SPECIFY what they should get, I mean, sorta takes the meaning out of it doesn’t it?
Post # 7
Member
2970 posts
Sugar bee
@gingerkitten: I only heard of this while my friend had on one of those “Real Housewifes of BS” shows – and my jaw dropped.
She wanted a Rolls Royse or Bentley or something as ridiculous for her push present. The husband obliged. I…just…can’t.
Isn’t the “push present” that cute little baby you actually push???
ETA: If my FH decided he wanted to get me a little something as a “thanks hon, you did awesome! I love you”. Yeah, sure. But putting a name to it & demanding it? No.
Post # 8
Member
2363 posts
Buzzing bee
- Wedding: September 2013 - B&B
I think it is a nice gesture for the dad to give a gift that basically says “Hey I am sure labour was hard, here’s a pretty thing for you! Good job honey!”
I would not flat out ASK for one, and I also wouldn’t be really disappointed like I was secretly expecting one if I didn’t get one either! As long as DH actually says at some point “I appreciate you spending the last nine months growing a human and pushing said human OUT of your body because I can’t”, then I will be happy. Ok probably not in those exact words!!!!!!!!! But you know 😛
Post # 9
Member
693 posts
Busy bee
- Wedding: October 2014 - Legare Waring House
It’s a strange concept to me…and DEFINITELY obnoxious when the woman asks for it.
If the baby is something they both want (which, in my opinion, it should be) then the gift is a little lopsided. I’m not big on gifts to begin with…so maybe that’s just me.
Also, perhaps the fact that I first saw it on RHONJ plays a role in my disdain.
Post # 10
Member
2815 posts
Sugar bee
I think it’s kinda silly. I’m in the camp that my baby is my “reward” for giving birth.. the last thing on my mind are the gifts I should get in addition. lol
Something sentimental is different…but a pricey gift for birthing a baby is a bit much.
Post # 11
Member
4778 posts
Honey bee
I hate that they are called “push presents!” Isn’t it much better to get a “you’re a new mommy” present?
Post # 12
Member
2250 posts
Buzzing bee
@MrsPanda99: I agree with everything you said here. +1.
Post # 13
Member
3081 posts
Sugar bee
@gingerkitten: I think they’re just weird, and creepy, and I do not like them. The name alone annoys me. However, the idea of a husband giving his wife something to symbolize the birth like the baby’s initial on something is cute, but a random luxury gift? Why? I also think the husband is equally entitled to a gift to commemorate the birth if the wife expects it too. Just because the woman does the pushing, doesn’t mean the man isn’t going to endure a whole hell of a lot through that and the parenting process as a whole!
Post # 14
Member
2665 posts
Sugar bee
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
@Artificial-Sweetener: I totally agree that a lot of the time it is something too extravagant. Many times on the bee when I see someone say they are going to ask for ________ for their push present, it is something like a diamond necklace or an upgrade to their engagement ring. Come on, people! Babies are expensive enough!
@HappySky7:
@veryberry13:
I agree that a purse is a very weird push present. I feel like if a gift is going to be given in this situation, it should be something sentimental, such as a locket as mentioned.
Post # 15
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
@gingerkitten: I think they’re fun and people should stop caring so much about gifts other people get.
Post # 16
Member
2665 posts
Sugar bee
- Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa
@Atalanta:
@whitums:
I totally hate the name “push present”, too! I am a visual thinker, so I get this weird image in my mind of a diamond necklace coming out with the baby… Like the prize in a cereal box… 
