(Closed) Spinoff: Should underage guests be allowed to drink?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should underage guests be allowed to drink?
    Yes, they are invited guests : (40 votes)
    16 %
    No, they are underage : (193 votes)
    77 %
    Other, see below. : (17 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 62
    Member
    4322 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 1992

    A no-go. If it’s illegal, it’s illegal. Go drink elsewhere, kid. Not at my wedding though.

    Post # 63
    Member
    2450 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    depends on your state’s laws. 

    i believe in wisconsin, under age kids are allowed to drink at weddings with parent’s permission.

    Post # 64
    Member
    128 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    There’s not enough no in the world.  Maybe I’m a fuddy-duddy, IDK.  But it’s illegal for a reason, and I don’t provide alcohol to underage people any other time, so I’m certainly not doing it on my wedding day, either.

    That said, as PPs have mentioned, this is an issue I would leave to the venue.  A reputable venue will ensure that anyone drinking alcohol is 21 or over.

    Post # 65
    Member
    1363 posts
    Bumble bee

    For me, sure. It’s kinda traditional anyway! My SO’s first time tipsy was age 12 at a wedding and I did lots of drinking and dancing at a wedding when I was 16. Big difference between 12 and 16 though – by 16, I drank regularly. I know it’s different in the US though – teens don’t drink. It’s like a whole different world, so you’re probably all gonna think I’m nuts/badly raised.

     

    Post # 66
    Member
    989 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    As a Catholic It is not uncommon for children over the age of 14 to have a small galss of wine at these events. I did growing up but it was only about 3 oz of wine. It was a special occasion and a part of family tradition. That said it has always been up to the parents if the children may drink  this celebratory drink or not.

    Post # 67
    Member
    2239 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I didn’t realize this was an issue.  >_>  I need to talk to my fiance about our bar.  I’m not okay with underage people who would be driving drinking at all.  I don’t want a bunch of underage kids abusing the bar.  I don’t want anything to happen to our guests.  And I def do not want people to drink and get US in trouble.  How the hell is it possible to monitor this? x_x  Great, another thing to worry about.  

    Post # 68
    Member
    1470 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    In my state, it is not illegal, with parent permission, for underage people to have a “nonintoxicating” amount of alcohol. This is true even when it is not in a private residence. I don’t know all the ins and outs of the law, but I do know that it is (or at least was up until a year or two ago, I couldn’t swear it’s a current law) legal for underage people to drink with parent permission. My venue actually told me about this rule when we were coming up with an alternative to champagne, and said it was up to parents. 

    Here’s a link to info about all the states:

    http://www.alcoholpolicy.niaaa.nih.gov/APIS_State_Profile.html?state=AL

    (I’m not making a statement that it’s right or wrong, I’m just saying those of you saying “it’s illegal, so wrong,” wouldn’t be right about all states.)

    Post # 69
    Member
    4044 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I don’t see how the amswer to this question can be anything other than, “of course not!”

    Post # 70
    Member
    2584 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    @rosworms:  Since you mentioned WI, actually, underage kids are allowed to drink anywhere if their parents are present and give permission- obviously they don’t order from a bar but the parents can give them alcohol. (It’s weird though… once you’re 18, you’re your own guardian, so you still can’t drink but your parents can no longer give you permission…)

     

    As far as the original question… no, I don’t think underage people should be allowed to drink at a wedding. That said, we did pass around a glass of wine for the head table for our toasts, and later realized we had an 18 year old (a date of a GM) and a 20 year old at the head table… oops. It was only a couple sips though.

    We found out a couple hours into the dance that the bartenders at our venue weren’t carding anyway… and even if they had been, it would’ve been super easy for some 21+ friends to get a beer and then just go hand it to one of our late teen/20 year old friends anyway… so, yes, we had underage people drinking. I had already decided that it wasn’t something I was going to worry about- I didn’t want that kind of stress on my wedding day, the venue could handle it if they had wanted- so we didn’t do anything. We did make sure that the clearly drunk people weren’t driving home though, and I’m pretty certain that no one drove home drunk- we helped a few people find rides if they needed one.

    Post # 71
    Member
    2696 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    …no

    Post # 72
    Member
    1370 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    No, I dont think they should. We had to carefully remind DH’s 20 year old brother of this. He ended up being the Dear Daughter for the family, but our alcohol (aside for the cash bar) was out for people to take. The keg with tap was out in the kegerator near the bar, but the bartender didn’t serve and an alcoholic and non alcoholic punch bowl. It worked on the honor system I guess.  I’m not sure who would have been responsible for that, actually. I guess it would have been us. He was the youngest guest in attendance so it wasn’t really a big worry for us.

    My 15 year old cousin got TRASHED at another cousin’s wedding several years ago. They also WAY overserved the groom. It was pretty crazy. I’m surprised they allowed it, honestly but the booze fept flowing and didn’t check any ID at all, obviously. They over served and served a ton of minors that night!

    Post # 73
    Member
    914 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    No. Not when it’s my party and I would be responsible. And it’s illegal.

    Post # 74
    Member
    1115 posts
    Bumble bee

    I’ve never even seen anyone get carded at a wedding. 

    Post # 75
    Member
    423 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think if the parents are present and they give their underage teenager the permission to drink, then it’s their perogative. In most provinces in Canada, the legal age is 19 (some are 18), and so I don’t mind a responsible 17 or 18 year old from enjoying a few beers or a glass of wine with dinner. We’re bringing in our own alcohol and have hired our own bartender, so it’s probably pretty flexible. I do not condone irresponsible underage drinking, and I wouldn’t want them doing shots or having cocktails, but I think a few beers or wine is ok if they have a safe drive home and their parents are cool with it is totally fine by me. 

    The topic ‘Spinoff: Should underage guests be allowed to drink?’ is closed to new replies.

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