(Closed) Spinoff: When you are on your soapbox

posted 6 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Would you tell someone they are doing something wrong with their body?
    Of course!!! : (1 votes)
    1 %
    It is none of my business!!! : (35 votes)
    41 %
    Only if I thought it was necessary...(what do you consider necessary?) : (50 votes)
    58 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    14440 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    What do you mean doing something wrong??  Dressing in not the most flattering way? Or eating habits?  Or…

    Post # 4
    Member
    2263 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I picked only when necessary…. if I genuinely thought they may be hurting themselves and wanted to help them see that. Fad diets, crash and burn drinking eating… whatever. I think those are all okay areas for someone to step in and help by saying something. Of course it’s not my business but I’d rather risk looking like a busybody than watching someone hurt themself or set themself up for a health crisis. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    2815 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I will only say something if they are a friend/relative.  One of my close friends was eating an obsurd amount of gummy vitamins and I gave her a piece of my mind (she wouldn’t listen to subtle comments).  If one of my friends is obsessed with tanning, I’d definitely say something.  

    Post # 6
    Member
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    What do you mean by “doing something wrong with their body?” That can be anything from not having proper form in yoga to injecting heroin.

    Post # 7
    Member
    778 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Only if I thought it was legitimately likely that they didn’t know that what they were doing might be harmful. So, using substances w/ well known medical risks–I would keep my mouth shut. It’s not my business and presumably they know what they’re doing. But if I saw someone, say, using gym equipment in a dangerous way that might result in serious injury, or, I dunno, absent-mindedly standing way too close to subway tracks, then yeah, I’d say something.

    Post # 9
    Member
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    I mind my own business. I certainly don’t like getting judgemental comments, so I doubt anyone else would too.

    Post # 10
    Member
    2866 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I can’t think of a time when I would find it approrpriate to tell someone else what to do with their body. I am a live and let live type of person so that’s not my style. If you are an adult and want to wreck your body then that’s your choice. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    1115 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    It would really depend on what they’re doing and how well I know the person. If it’s someone I know well, I’m more likely to say something if what they’re doing is slightly harmful. If it’s someone I know less well, it has to be more harmful for me to want to say anything.

    Post # 12
    Member
    5096 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    I guess it would really vary, then. I’ve participated in an intervention with an alcoholic family member, so I guess my answer would have to be “only when necessary.”

    But I would never in a million years comment on someone’s clothes, weight, diet, exercise, makeup, etc.

    Post # 13
    Member
    2233 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think with certain things there are ways to go about helping someone without it coming off as judgemental. For example, FI’s nieces wear their make-up in the exact same way their mom does, it looks awful, they have racoon eyes and look about 30 when they’re still teens. If I wanted to I could offer to do their make up for them as a treat (they know that I like to do that) and I could teach them new techniques. I’m not about to tell them that they should change it, just give other options.

    I think this is also a bit of a cultural thing. In my family and in FI’s family no one would think twice about giving unsolicited advice. Yes it’s annoying but it’s almost always offered with love and good intentions. I’ve just learned to get used to it and not dish it out because I’m not a huge fan.

    Post # 14
    Member
    2790 posts
    Sugar bee

    It depends on who it is. When it somes to my sister, my fiance, or my parents I absolutely would say something. More often then not it’s about what they are wearing but sometimes with my Fiance, I tell him that something he’s eating is probably going to kill him one day or give him a heart attack.

    When it comes to strangers on the street, I may think things about how they could change what their wearing or eating but I think it would be incredibly cruel to actually say it. We all have our own personal thoughts about others, it’s a matter of it you speak those things out loud and can feel comfortable telling someone they need to change something about themselves.

    Post # 15
    Member
    14440 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2011

    Unless asked, I keep my mouth shut.  I cant think of a single time I’ve given unsolicited opinion on anything like that…. unless its my husband or immediate family.

    Post # 16
    Member
    9824 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    Nope. I might not agree with someone’s choices, but that is THEIR choice to make. If I don’t want someone harassing me about choices I make, I need to extend the same courtesy.

    The topic ‘Spinoff: When you are on your soapbox’ is closed to new replies.

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