(Closed) SPINOFF-Who's NOT Likely Getting A Holiday Proposal?

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
  • poll: Are you NOT expecting to get a holiday proposal?

    I'm Not Expecting One and I'm AWESOME!

    I'm Not Expecting One and I'm going SHOPPING! Retail Therapy!

    I'm Not Expecting One and I'm going to the SPA!! Spa Therapy!

    I'm Not Expecting One and I'm TOTALLY FINE WITH IT!

    I'm Not Expecting One and I LIKE POLLS!

    I'm Not Expecting One and I Have Words Of Wisdom!

  • Post # 47
    Member
    6 posts
    Newbee

    @PoppyH That happened to me too! Last Christmas, I saw that my gift from my SO was small. I unwrapped it to find a ring box from Tiffany’s… and there was a necklace in there. I saw my family’s faces drop. He was clueless to the awkwardness. I had to tell him later on.

    He hasn’t asked what I want for Christmas yet. I know he does his shopping very last minute. This year I’m telling him if he’s getting me something other than obvious, just get me something inexpensive and don’t put it in ring box. Spending a lot of something else would just annoy me… Now that I think of it, if I told him NOT to put my gift in a ring box, he would definitely do it to try to be funny. Ugh. Pass the eggnog.

    Post # 48
    Member
    62 posts
    Worker bee

    View original reply
    @veryberry13:  I don’t usually listen to music when I run. Maybe some new tunes would help. Funny christmas movies are definitely a good plan. 

     

    Post # 49
    Member
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @veryberry13:  A few months ago I was very bitter as well seeing everyone getting engaged. I don’t actually want to get married for a little while because I’m only 20, but it still feels unfair to me that so many girls get their proposal after 8-9 months of dating when my SO and I have been together for five years. It’s better now because we live together, but before it was so difficult to watch because we were both working our way through college and couldn’t afford to live together on top of our schools being an hour in the opposite direction, so it wouldn’t have made sense for us. It made me the most upset that these girls are working pretty crappy part time jobs, but still are able to afford a ring, wedding, house, etc. because their families help with everything. I know in the end everything that I have will be rightfully earned, but it’s still difficult to watch.

    Post # 50
    Member
    1019 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    @beetee123:  I know what you mean. I’m about your age, and I’ve been with DBF for about a year and a half. But it seems like whenever someone I know gets engaged, they never end up marrying each other – out of the three engagements I saw on Facebook this past year, all three of them happened after I got with DBF, and all three girls are now single.

    Honestly, though, I’m not expecting a holiday proposal. DBF and I actually had a discussion about it a few weeks ago. He thought that we were both focusing on our future too much, rather than our relationship as it is now. We agreed that by overlooking what we have now that we were rushing our relationship. It’s hard, though, especially since we can’t live together for at least another two years… 

    Post # 51
    Member
    1798 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @Luvdisc:  Not living together was the hardest thing. My SO and I kind of got into a rut because it felt like our relationship was going nowhere. We either had to hang out at his parents’ house or mine. His parents are really overbearing, so it was difficult to be around them, and if we went to my house my younger sister always wanted to hang out with us. It was hard to find time for ourselves, so we ended up just going to the mall or out to dinner pretty much every night we were together. We also felt like we couldn’t work as much because we wanted to leave room in our schedule for each other. We spent two years overanalyzing everything financially to make sure we would be able to afford living together, but we finally just decided to go for it. Now things are awesome. It’s so nice to just be able to see SO before bed and in the morning! 

    Post # 52
    Member
    1926 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I’m definitely not expecting one and I’m pretty bitter about it. I won’t be expecting one for at least 4-5 years which breaks my heart. I’m starting to debate setting a walk date. 

    Post # 53
    Member
    2512 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I’m not expecting it because I know how much is in the ring fund, and I told SO we absolutely were not forgoing Christmas gifts to get my ring. I originally thought he would present me with a ring in October when we went on vacation, but I knew before we left that the funds simply hadn’t been there. It was just too much to try to put money aside for a ring while also saving for vacation and the holidays.

    Honestly, at this point, we are really just engaged without the ring. We already have a rough draft of our wedding figured out. It’ll probably be laste February or March by the time we have the savings complete ( we have joint finances ) and the ring ordered. I know I won’t be waiting for more than a few days after it arrives. I have very simple proposal expectations.

    We had a mailer for a massive Thanksgiving jewelry sale come a few days ago. SO looked at it sadly and said, “It’s too bad this coupon is only good for one day.” : )

    I don’t feel like I’m waiting because, aside from the neurosis of the first few months after he announced he was taking me ring shopping, I don’t need to wait for him; I’m just waiting on the jewelry. I know I would have a ring on my finger already if we hadn’t gone on vacation. Our vacation was definitely worth the extra few months of being ringless.

    Post # 55
    Member
    1926 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @veryberry13:  He wanted to wait for me to graduate- I graduate in March and he’s still making excuses for why we can’t get engaged. We’ve been together for nearly three years, we live together and are in our early twenties. He agreed to propose by a certain date but makes jokes all the time about how he’ll never marry me/I’ll be waiting a long time, etc etc. 

    Post # 57
    Member
    1926 posts
    Buzzing bee

    View original reply
    @veryberry13:  His excuse is that it’s not the right time. And that boy does not have a bone in his body that would compel him to surprise me with anything. I feel like I’m one of those girls that’s going to get a ring box tossed in her lap, no romance, nothing. 

    Post # 58
    Member
    2512 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    View original reply
    @musician32992:  Early twenties + still in school + not quite 3 years = maybe it’s not as bad as you think. I get where you are coming from, but I know SO wasn’t ready to propose 3 years into our relationship.

    Post # 60
    Member
    522 posts
    Busy bee

    I’m not getting a winter/holiday proposal which is a shame because the season I think I’d most love a proposal is winter. Oh well! Our timeline is the next year and a half so hopefully in that time!

    I’m definitely going to work off my disappointment at the gym and with a little retail therapy too 😉

    Post # 61
    Member
    17 posts
    Newbee

    I don’t think I’m getting one! We just bought a house together and are completely overwhelmed with that, plus it drained our bank accounts! I’m good with it though, the whole house buying process has made this relationship feel very ‘forever’ as we had to get life insurance for eachother and whatnot.

    I’m sure it won’t stop the family from asking if we’re engaged yet though!

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