Post # 1
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
Just what the subject says. I’m curious why some Christian weddings don’t have dancing? Is it the “dancing = vertical sex” or “dancing = foreplay” thing? Is it because dancing often goes hand in hand with getting wasted? (At least in my circle, lol!)
I’m not judging the no-dancing folks whatsoever, just really curious. I grew up without much religious influence and don’t have many religious friends, so the first I heard of this was here on the boards.
Post # 3
The old joke is that <insert your Christian denomination here> is opposed to premartial sex, because it can lead to dancing.
I think there is a bit of puritan influence that dancing is a bit too sexual. I don’t think it’s the association with drinking. Also many Christians don’t dance much and so just don’t see the point of it at their weddings.
Mind you I’m Australian and lots of weddings here don’t have dancing, even non Christian ones.
Post # 4
Growing up in a Baptist church, we were told dancing draws a lot of sexual thoughts and attention to the body (except classical dances such as the waltz). So we weren’t supposed to dance since we are supposed to wait for sex until we are married, and dancing can be very sexual.
It didn’t bother me not to dance at the wedding since I have no idea how. 🙂
Also, music with a beat is not supposed to be listened to (yet, I’m a hardcore country music fan), so there was only classical music at my wedding (not very fun to dance to, is it?).
Keep in mind that these issues are just a person’s personal standards, and people aren’t mocked or ridiculed for having dancing at their wedding, as I have several friends who danced at their weddings. It’s not like your breaking a huge rule or something.
Post # 5
I’m Christian and the majority of our wedding reception is focused on DANCING! lol. I think it’s hard to say it’s a “Christian”thing, whereas it’s more of a denomination thing. For example, I grew up in the Methodist church where after football games, our church would actually host “5th quarter” which was a dance (geared towards giving students another option instead of going out and drinking). The Baptist church down the road would NEVER host this type of an evnet. But I’ve been to may Baptist weddings where there was dancing at the reception. So some people may not believe dancing belongs in the church, but it’s ok outside of the church and some may believe it’s never ok. I think it’s mostly the denomination that a couple comes from and their own personal point of view. P.S. I’m not picking on Baptist, it was merely used as an example =)
Post # 6
@Terryal87: My church too, we dance around before the sermon, I love it. I get my groove on!
My FI’s mother used to say that “dancin’ leads to sexin’.” and didn’t like it when my FI and I danced around in front of the T.V. for fun. We were watching Footloose and we were dancing to it and she got upset and said that the movie showed how innapproperiate dancing was for youth and we shouldn’t do it because we’d end up having sex because of it. Of course we just laughed and told her she was being stupid and illogical.
I am a Christian and there will be dancing at my wedding, I don’t know about any other Christian but in the bible it talked about dancing, drinking and merriment, so if Jesus chilled out at parties I can too, I think I am good. LOL!
Post # 7
My family is Old Regular Southern Baptist and regard dancing as sinful because of sexual connations it may have.
Then again, they also ascribe to the following beliefs:
-Women cannot wear pants; men cannot wear shorts.
-Women can not cut their hair or wear makeup; men must always have trimmed hair and no beards.
So dancing was just always another thing, you know.
Post # 8
I dont even think it is so much a denominational thing as a individual church/congregation thing. Out of seven area Baptist churches 3 allow dancing 4 dont all in the same conference.
out of five united methodist 4 allow 1 doesnt
2 catholic both do
3 luthern 2 do 1 doesnt
see there is no ryhme or reason
Post # 9
In my high school (i went to a christian school all my life) we weren’t allowed to have dances and we couldn’t even call our prom prom (it was a formal). We weren’t allowed to dance because they were worried that it would “take our eyes off the Lord and lead us into sin”. That being said, I went to FI’s real prom, and had a ball dancing, and was not lead into sin at all. in fact, after PROM, we went out and had ice cream. we didn’t do the hotel lose the v-card move that my high school so believed would happen if dancing occured.
Post # 10
@secondchances: agreed! I grew up in a town with 1 methodist church, 1 church of christ, 1 baptist, and 1 assembly of God. So I didn’t have many to compare to. lol. I definitely agree that it’s more of a choice per church.
Post # 11
I can understand bumping and grinding and whatnot, but it bothers me when churches say “no dancing AHHHHH!!” because in the Bible, it talks about David dancing in praise to God. It also talks about the traditional festivals and feasts that involve dancing.
I think sometimes people see one form of something, and then deem it ALL bad, and that really irritates me.
Same thing with the churches that say no drinking (I’ve never seen a verse that says no drinking, only not to be drunk), and not to use musical instruments.
It’s really hard for me to find a church I feel really comfortable in.
Post # 12
This is so interesting! I knew Christians of all denominations growing up and never actually realised this was a real thing outside of “Footloose.” I think a lot of denominations in Canada tend to be a bit more easygoing though.
Post # 13
@Torrid: yah You gotta wonder sometimes where they come up with their rules. I have often wondered if Jesus himself would be comfortable or accepted in some of our churches. I really try not to let people get to me or I would never go to church. I dont live my life to please others and if it makes ya happy to condemn me condemn away I say. Judge not seems to have gone over peoples heads :p and they dont even understand what scripture really says do they?
Post # 14
@secondchances: Yeah sometimes I get very frustrated because there is a lot of picking and choosing, and very often it’s picking stuff (or making it up) that doesn’t matter and leaving out stuff that does. Many Christians don’t know why they believe what they do based on scripture, they just believe because they heard it. I’m not perfect by any means, but that at least is important to me.
Post # 15
- Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA
So interesting! Thanks Bees! I thought there might be some other more specific scriptural reason, but it sounds like it’s very “Footloose” and also variable depending on the specific church.
Post # 16
I went to a Christian wedding and there was no dancing other than the first dance which I got roped into because FI was a groomsman. There was no room and I felt stupid. FI got told off for leaving the bridal table to talk to people. Not sure if that’s common but why invite people if you aren’t allowed to talk to them!
Not sure if it was because it was Christian or just the people but the wedding was bat-shit boring!