(Closed) Spinoff: Would You Adopt a Child Even If….

posted 6 years ago in The Lounge
  • poll: Which one applies to you? (please substitute "would" for "have" if you've already made this choice)
    I would only adopt if I could not have biological children of my own. : (121 votes)
    37 %
    I plan to adopt as well as have biological children. : (60 votes)
    19 %
    I plan to adopt instead of having biological children (although I am able to; I'd prefer to adopt). : (16 votes)
    5 %
    If I found out I could not have biological children, I would not adopt; I would be child-free. : (30 votes)
    9 %
    I don't plan to have any kids ever. : (29 votes)
    9 %
    Other - please explain! :) : (15 votes)
    5 %
    I just plain don't know what I would do right now - I haven't decided yet! : (52 votes)
    16 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    5547 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    We plan to adopt in addition to having our own, of course as of right now we haven’t tried to have kids so we don’t know if we will have trouble or not. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    7771 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I plan to adopt in the far future even though I can have my own.  I prefer to adopt.

    Post # 5
    Member
    1925 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    Growing up, I always wanted to adopt (not sure why or where it came from, though).  When I started to date my Fiance, he said that he wants to have biological children of his own and that it would be a deal breaker for him if I wasn’t into that.  Because it’s not that important to me, I decided I could do it.  I made that agreement when I was 19, him 21 (wow we were so young!) and now at 25, I actually realllllly want my own kids.  It’s so weird how that ticking clock started at age 23 (weird) and I wanted to have kids!  …But not for another 5 years or so!

    However, if I was unable to conceive, we would absolutely adopt.  I told him I wouldn’t want to do IVF or anything like that 1) because it’s not good for my body and 2) because there are so many children in the world who need homes.

    Post # 6
    Member
    2416 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I’m not sure how I feel about this…I’m wishy-washy on having children anyways, so I don’t know.

    If we did adopt it would likely be because we couldn’t get pregnant – if I can’t have a child then I will NOT get any sort of fertility treatment. Nothing that effs with your hormones is good for you and, like the above poster, there are so many kids who really need a family.

    I would, however, let the child know from the very beginning that he/she was adopted…probably by reading adoption books from infancy so as to avoid the life-altering “talk” when the kid can understand.

    Post # 8
    Member
    10288 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I’ve never had a desire to adopt though I would if I couldn’t have my own biological children. I would also consider adoption after having my own biological child if I felt the urge to have another kid. Though, as it stands right now we’re 1 and done. 

    Post # 9
    Member
    1327 posts
    Bumble bee

    @Miss Orchard:  I am on the same page as you, if I couldn’t have kids I would not go though fertility treatments. I would most likely adopt at that point because there are so many kids out there looking for homes. I think I would also like to foster other kids as well.. maybe.

    Post # 10
    Member
    10851 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    We plan on having our own kids, but I’m totally open to adoption in addition to our own family if we felt up to it. It’s not a set in stone plan, it’s a “let’s see what happens” sort of idea. So with that being said, I selected other.

    Post # 11
    Member
    1444 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I hope I don’t get hate for this, but I voted that if I couldn’t have biological children I’d be childfree.  The reason I voted for this option is because I feel like part of me is still “on the fence” about parenthood in general.  If Darling Husband and I happen to get pregnant over the next year or so, great.  I’m sure we’ll do fine.  But if we find out we can’t conceive after about a year or two…well, by the time that would roll around he’d be due to go back out to sea on a sub again…and I’d be stuck here alone while he deploys.  I want to try to get pregnant while he is on shore duty so he’d be around to help me out at first with “learning how to be a parent”, if that makes sense. If I knew I’d be a great mommy, if I knew that I’d enjoy parenthood…well, I’d love to adopt and not even go through the whole “pregnancy” deal.  But I don’t know how I’ll be as a mom.  It is scary to me.  My feelings may change once I get into TTC…right now I don’t know though.  I feel like maybe there are others out there born with the “mommy gene” who’d be better equipped to take care of children than me!

    Post # 12
    Member
    574 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2011

    If we couldn’t have our own, we might adopt.  We’re not open to fertility treatments.  It’s just not something I think I could handle emotionally.  At that point, we would adopt if we weren’t too old.  DH and I don’t want to have kids after a certain age, adopted or biological, so if neither of those options work out, we’d be child-free and I would be ok with that.

    Post # 14
    Member
    756 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2011

    We are as yet undecided on having children at all, but if we decide we want a child, I would prefer to adopt.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1767 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I answered this under the assumption that I will actually want kids someday (which seems doubtful at this point). 

    The concept of pregnancy/delivery absolutely terrifies me, and I can’t get over the idea that fetuses are just parasites. So if I really wanted to have the experience of having children in my life, I’d adopt them. They get a home, I don’t have to go through that trauma. Everyone wins. 

    Post # 16
    Member
    452 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @Juliepants:  Hamster Farm.  This is awsome.  And reminded me of the “blogess” have you heard of her? http://thebloggess.com/  she’s pretty hilarious…

    Anyways, I think we’d consider adoption or being childless.  I worked in a fertility practice for a while and I’m not sure I could handle the emotions of it all.

    The topic ‘Spinoff: Would You Adopt a Child Even If….’ is closed to new replies.

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