(Closed) SPINOFF-Would you expect a vegetarian option at a meat eaters wedding?

posted 7 years ago in Reception
Post # 122
Member
1093 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m having a veggie entree.  There are more vegetarians out there than you would think!

 

Side salads do not count as a meal.

Post # 123
Member
9520 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

you should absolutely have a vegetarian friendly option. 

 

 

 

a friend of mine went to a wedding a few weeks ago and told me i would have been miserable had i been the one invited.  they only options for dinner were 2 fish dishes.  i don’tlike the taste of fish.  i would have been very unhappy not being able to have something for dinner.

 

as a host, you need to think about your guests also.

 

 

 

Post # 124
Member
6036 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

my opinion probably won’t be popular but im used to that lol… Personally I feel since vegetarianism in most cases is a choice and not a medical dietary condition, Im not required to tailor my wedding menu to the preferences of what will most likely be the minority. Other things like price, availability, etc would factor in as well. I know people who choose not to eat cheese because they don’t like it, but i wouldn’t eliminate a dish with cheese since a few of my guests don’t like cheese. I’m going to choose my menu based on what I think are the most tasty and most generally liked options and have as much variety as I can.  I guess I have an issue with comparing vegetarianism (optional in most cases) with a condition that REQUIRES you eat a certain way. some vegetarians are that way for medical reasons and I get that, in that case if I was aware of this medical need I would probably find out what the options were to feed that guest, but I wouldn’t necessarily tailor my dinner options over all to that one or a few guests. Plus, its kind of rude to say something like “at a vegetarian wedding the meat eaters would just have to deal but the other way around is just unacceptable.” double standard much?  

Post # 125
Member
489 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Fiance & I are hard core carnivores who host an annual bacon-themed party (ha) but we’re going to accommodate vegetarians. Our guests are our family & friends so we don’t want them to go hungry! Even if they don’t share our love for bacon.

Post # 126
Member
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I already commented on this, but Fiance and I were going through our menu options again last night since we’re starting to get ready for our tasting and we were double-checking that there were veggie options available in every course. Our cocktail hour has both hot and cold passed trays, we made sure there was a hot and cold vegetarian option plus fruit, veggie, and cheese trays, and our mashed potato bar (which is meat-optional, mmm bacon). At dinner, we’re having a pasta course and a salad, both of which are vegetarian-friendly, and while neither of our two plated entrees are vegetarian, they’ll be available upon request. It’s so easy to make good food available for everyone at your wedding, I see no reason not to. I’ll admit that our wedding may not be super vegan-friendly, but we definitely have our vegetarian friends covered.

Post # 127
Member
729 posts
Busy bee

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@stardustintheeyes:  How many times do people have to say it: Vegetarianism is not the same thing as not liking something! Yes, it’s a choice; a choice based on ethics! That’s a way more important distinction than refusing to eat cheese because you don’t like it. Trying to get them to eat meat is pretty much the same thing as asking a Jewish person to eat ham. Yes, they are physically capable of eating it, but that doesn’t mean they should be forced. Obviously you don’t have a moral problem with eating meat but surely you have moral objections to *something.* Do you think it’s okay for people to violate that?

And it’s not a double standard. Vegetarians in a wedding full of meat end up going hungry. Meat eaters at a vegetarian wedding can still eat the food. 

It’s really insensitive to crap all over someone’s ethical decisions. True medical need is not an excuse.

Post # 128
Member
82 posts
Worker bee

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@lampshade:  +1 to this and your original post!

Post # 129
Member
6036 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2019 - City, State

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@lampshade:  not having an option is not *forcing* them to do anything. I have no problem with vegetarians but im not going to tailor my menu to the choices of a few (my guest list only has a few), no matter their reasons. me not choosing a vegetarian option is not “violating” anyone’s moral choices because im not forcing anyone to do anything. So the drama isn’t necessary. I feel how I feel and thats just how it is. I can agree to disagree and obviously not everyone feels how I do, nor are they required to, they also aren’t required to like my opinion. But that is my opinion. Granted, i’m not completely rude since I am (upon request from the 2-5 vegetarians that may be at my wedding) going to make sure there are some yummy sides and salads included that can be given to the guests who do not want the meat being served or the fish. Also, as long as it’s under 5 I believe our caterer will put together a meatless plate. My point was, we chose our menu based on what we thought would be the best for the guests as a whole, and were not willing to take up one of the two options we had available to us for a vegetarian option.

Post # 130
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@lookingforadvice77:  Sorry I don’t have time to ask over 200 guests (half of which I do not know) whether or not they are vegetarian. Like some bees pointed out to me- you can ask on the RSVP. So why don’t you keep the sassy ass attitude to yourself.

Post # 131
Member
1087 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I think there might be some confusion here. The way it seems to work with most caterers (at least for the dozen or so weddings I’ve been to) is that you get your pick of 1, 2, 3 entrees PLUS a veggie option when it’s only a small number of guests. So there’s usually no need to take away from your standard choices, it’s more like an add on. In general they are cheaper too. So all you should have to do is let people know its an option on the RSVP (pick chicken, beef, or veggie). That’s if it’s a sit down of course. Buffets are different, usually a pasta choice is all you need there unless you also have Girlfriend needing guests. 

Post # 132
Member
1589 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I have a big group (150) so I imagine I’ll have a vegeterian or two. Yes we’ll have an option for them- available upon request.

Post # 133
Member
723 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

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@MissDarthVader: I’m sorry, what? I wasn’t aware I was being sassy. All I said was that since you didn’t ask them on your RSVP cards, you should consider making sure that you have adequate vegetarian options. How is that sassy? I think anybody would find a dinner of green beans and salad to be sad. Obviously it’s your wedding so you can do what you want, but that’s my opinion. I had an extremely laid back wedding and didn’t “do the homework” of asking any of my guests about their dietary limitations either. But I did view it as my responsibility to provide a number of options for my guests–including vegetarian, vegan, plentiful side dishes, etc. I would hate to imagine any guests going hungry because I didn’t provide them with food that they could eat–yours or mine or anybody else’s.

ETA: If you have 200 guests, I guarantee that you have a handful of vegetarians in the group. I just think you should consider updating your menu to accommodate them is all.

Post # 134
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2014

We are having a vegetarian option and chicken option. I don’t eat red meat, so that is what we chose. 

Post # 135
Member
377 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@lookingforadvice77:  I got you. It’s cool. Thought you were being snarky with me. I get it. Haven’t sent out my invitations yet. I don’t even have them made lol.

Post # 136
Member
558 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I wouldn’t dream of hosting people without making sure I could feed them appropriately.  As it stands, we’ll likely do a meat and grain free wedding, because Fiance and I are both gluten-free, and because we have friends who are kosher.  It’s easier and cheaper, frequently, to do dairy/parve parties (i.e., no meat and nothing that violates kosher laws like pork, shellfish, etc) rather than deal with getting kosher meat.  That way, everyone has food that they can eat, the same way I would accomodate vegetarians and kosher friends in my home, despite the fact that Fiance and I eat meat and don’t keep strictly kosher at this point in our lives.  

To me, this is basic courtesy.  But if you have a group of guests without any dietary or religious restrictions and you know for certain that this is the case, then I guess you can serve every dish with meat in it, if it makes you happy.  

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