(Closed) Spouse is a major mommas boy…. advice please!!

posted 4 years ago in Guests
Post # 76
Member
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2018

Please just run. No one deserves this. Go start a new fresh start with your daughter. Your spouse is 39 and he should know way better 

Post # 77
Member
298 posts
Helper bee

It sounds like you already know you should leave,  so now comes the hard part.   Don’t let him convince you to not go,  you know in your heart that this relationship isn’t making you happy.   I can clearly see from your post that you aren’t happy.  I’m guessing your parents would be willing to help you out,  maybe even offer you a place to stay until you get back on your feet.   If not,  are there friends you can reach out to,  or other family members?  There are plenty of services in place for women who need help too.  I’m not saying that you’ll need to use them,  but just know that there is always a way out.   Don’t worry about taking off time from work,  or getting day care.   Worry about getting you and your child out.   That’s step one.   Once that’s sorted you can focus on sorting the other things.  I know it sounds scary and impossible now,  but you’ve got to think about the alternative.   He and his mom sound a bit dangerous and irresponsible.  You shouldn’t be around that a moment longer. 

ETA : I just read your updates.   I’m sorry you can’t stay with your parents,  I know that can make it seem even more impossible.  But,  you got this girl!  We all believe in you,  that you can do this.   You can find a way to leave,  and you’ll find help with day care.   I didn’t read through each post,  but most of the ones I saw are telling you to run,  now.   They wouldn’t all be saying that if they didn’t believe that you could.  Look up local women’s shelters,  they’ll be able to give you a place to stay and help you figure out childcare.   They’ll have resources to help you sign up for any financial help that you may need, and counselors to help get you back on your feet.  You’re stronger than you think!   And you can do this! 

Post # 78
Member
10308 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Go to your local women’s shelter.

Post # 80
Member
3416 posts
Sugar bee

Have you taken any steps to leave?

Post # 81
Member
1601 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I’m assuming your update means you are protecting your money? That’s a good step. What about getting out of the house and getting your baby away from him and his mom? 

Post # 82
Member
7955 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
marshmallowbee :  As long as you are safe continue to save up some money. If you do not feel safe please just pack up what you can carry and get out of there now. Let your guy find a lease in his mother’s name on his own. 

Post # 83
Member
151 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

You in Danger Girl, Run like you and your daughter’s life is in danger because it is

Post # 84
Member
7982 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

If your name isn’t on the lease, I dont see an issue why they cant add his moms name? Let her be liable for the debts and GTFO there!

Post # 86
Member
650 posts
Busy bee

Leave. Go. Allons y. Take your kid and get out of there. A woman who watched the father of your child throw everything in your house in FRONT of said child does not have your daughter’s interest at heart. You need to think of your daughter above everything else. It won’t be easy but you have to actually pack up and leave. The steps you are taking are not enough. 

Post # 87
Member
7955 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

View original reply
marshmallowbee :  I’m not sure what to make of your update. I don’t know why it matters whose name is on the hydro bill if you are leaving. And you have to leave. 

Take your daughter to get groceries and go see your grandfather. And never look back. Your DH will always choose her over you and your daughter. You can do this, Bee. 

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