Your Spouse's Nieces and Nephews?

posted 3 months ago in Family
Post # 61
Member
1070 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2017 - A vineyard

Since this was bumped and I think it’s interesting. No I don’t think they do. But I don’t really mind honestly. My husbands nieces and  nephews are all on the older side  and only met some of them over the last year since we don’t live near his family. Our daughter is the youngest one of the grandchildren and she’s just a baby. I think they should call me what they feel comfortable. Whether its Aunt or just by my name. 

I mean I’ll be honest. It took me probably a year to get used to the idea that my aunt by marriage is my aunt. Not that I didn’t  adore her. I absolutely did because she is an awesome person. I was just used to the prior aunt before her and my moms sister and great aunt using the name and they all live so far away. It was just easier to use her first name. Now it’s been years and I can’t imagine anyone but her in the role and I am so so grateful that I have been given as much time as I have to get to know her and spend time with her. She is absolutely my Aunt.

Post # 62
Member
1239 posts
Bumble bee

I like this topic. I have met most of fh’s  family. He is the baby so his siblings have kids nearly my age. Lol. 

The adult neices and nephews have never referred to me as aunt. But I don’t know them that well yet. And we do have a slight language barrier. 

My one sister’s  kids have met him a few times, they are quite young… they haven’t called him uncle but my brother in law does refer to him as their uncle. 

I think with more time it’ll be more natural. 

Post # 63
Member
548 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I always called both my parent’s siblings and their spouses Aunt or Uncle So-and-So. I sometimes drop them now when I’m talking to them as an adult but I would totally be bummed if my husband’s brothers kids didn’t call me Aunt jazzylove! 

Post # 64
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

I think what names people get are a direct reflection of 1) how much time they spend with the nieces and nephews, and 2) if they were little kids when you married their uncle. 

My fiancé’s sister just had a baby and the whole family is calling me aunt already. His younger brother has a girlfriend of 4 years and even though they aren’t engaged or married his mom calls her aunt as well. I think they are a welcoming inclusive family, but they also spend time together often. 

I am most aware of needing to be in a kids life often in order to get the benefit of them liking me, feeling like I care, and feeling close to me, which would = them calling me Aunt etc. 

If I were in your shoes I’d be sad too that the new sil gets an instant title. I’m assuming from your post details it’s because she is more in their lives? I’m sorry OP that sucks. 

Post # 65
Member
352 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

Overjoyed :  My husband’s first two nephews were born before we were married (but engaged) – and I was always referred to as “Auntie firstname” from the get-go and we refer to them as “our nephews”

I agree with the majority, that I wouldn’t take it personally due to the ages of the children.  That said, if they were my children, I would have told them to refer to you as Aunty even before your marriage. 

Post # 66
Member
93 posts
Worker bee

My boyfriend has two nieces (5 and 7 y/o). They don’t call me anything but one time their mother told me that they asked if the usual people were going to be over for Christmas dinner and among their parents’ friends/family was my boyfriend and “aunt Professorbride” (me). It was cute and not suprising since I’ve been with their uncle for most of their lives. I don’t have siblings and my close friends don’t have any children so I would love to have a good relationship with them when they are older.

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