Post # 1
My husband and I moved from a small apartment in a 28-unit building to a much bigger apartment in a 6-unit building in July. We’re really loving our new unit and the neighbours have all been really. We’re on the main floor, and all the upstairs tenants are friendly young couples/families. Next to us are to late 20’s/early 30’s male room-mates. They are both very quiet and soft-spoken, so I’ve never even met one and was only briefly introduced to the other, who was very friendly and polite.
Their washroom shares a wall with our washroom. Every morning (for three years), I get up at 6:00am to take a quick shower (less than five minutes) and get ready for work. I’ve noticed that on some/most days, I can hear other tenants running showers as well and though the water pressure is a little sucky, it’s never bothered me. However, for the last month one of the guys in the unit next door has been swearing loudly as soon as I turn my shower on. Yesterday, as soon as I turned my shower on I heard, “What the f*uck?! Every f*cking morning!” And today, when I turned my shower on, I heard “What the f*ck?!” followed by loud banging on our shared wall (I’m pretty sure he was pounding it with his fist).
I can’t tell which guy this is but I’m getting really angry. I take my quick shower at the same time every day and always have. I don’t have any problem sharing the hot water and water pressure with anyone else so I don’t feel like I should have to change my routine for some grown man who is acting like a child. On top of that, I don’t know how long he’s spending in there, so waking up 15 minutes early might not accomplish anything and showering later is not a possibility.
So what am I supposed to do? Ignore it? Try to get up earlier? I’m very non-confrontational so I’d rather not address it in person. I do know that the guys are moving out in two months so do I just wait it out?
Post # 2
anonybee0810: wow! Can you call the landlord/office manager of the apartment? That’s usually how I handle situations with my neighbors, that way I do not have to confront them myself. Otherwise I would keep my normal routine! Not your problem. Glad they are moving out!!
Post # 3
You could pop over to their apartment at a reasonable hour of the evening and say something like, “I’ve noticed that water pressure situation is upsetting you in the mornings.” Then talk to them and see if you can find some sort of arrangement that either lets everyone have the water pressure they like, or keeps them from cursing you every morning. He shouldn’t be acting like a big giant baby but sadly people get into conflicts with their neighbors all the time, and even if these guys are moving out soon, it’s good practice for your future neighbor altercations.
Post # 4
anonybee0810: I would probably shut off the water and yell back (as politely as one can yell), “I’m sorry sir but I have to bathe before work!” I’ve had a lot of really terrible neighbors in the course of my life, the worst are the kind who think they’re entitled to private-home sound control at apartment prices. I once had a downstairs neighbor who accosted me on my way out of the house to complain that when I opened my closet door it woke her up in the morning. So…I’m not supposed to use my closet? These were cheaply built apartments, I’m sorry but you get what you pay for.
Now there’s a place for complaint when the neighbors are making unnecessary noise at odd hours (neighbor who had very loud sex followed by very loud fighting at 3AM, I’m looking at you), but complaining for the noise caused by reasonable apartment use is just ridiculous. You pay rent to use your shower at 6AM, your neighbor doesn’t have the right to antagonize you for it. Good luck!!!
Post # 5
KatesTheWord: Our landlords are my only other complaint about our building, as they’re pretty much completely detached from it. My husband has called them before to complain about other things (tenants of other buildings stealing our parking spot, etc.) and they pretty much just consistantly wash their hands of anything going on. I’m sure they’d tell us just to confront our neighbours or change our schedule. Which I guess is really the only option, besides ignoring it.
Horseradish: I’m really uncomfortable addressing it with a complete stranger who seems inclined towards anger/immaturity issues. I do agree that it’s good practice for dealing with altercations like an adult, no doubt, but confrontation with angry strangers in the city makes me feel like I’m going to get shanked in the parking lot. I told my husband about it, thinking it might be better coming from another man, but my husband is similarly disinclined to get into it with this guy, not knowing how he’d react.
Post # 6
jennmariee: That happened in our first building! When my husband and I were still dating, many years ago, we lived in a bachelor apartment in a converted house. We were regularly woken up by the girl upstairs have crazy-loud sex at 3AM after stumbling home from the bar. It used to drive me nuts but I always figured you get what you pay for: when your apartment is dirt-cheap in a tired old building with thin walls, you deal with it.
I’m going to try getting up 15 minutes earlier tomorrow to see if that helps, but I’m kind of in love with the idea of my thin little morning voice squeaking “sorry, sir, I must bathe!” through the wall, ahahahaha.
Post # 7
he’s mad because you are taking a shower in the morning? Something is not right with him. I’d ignore it – don’t give him the power to upset you.
Post # 8
anonybee0810: We had a neighbor at our last apartment who would randomly get upset about small issues like this (or like, our dog letting out a very small bark when he walked in the building and SLAMMED the door to the building – we lived on the first floor), while at the same time, staying up at all hours of the night, having really, really loud sex and smoking cigarettes in his apartment (and the stink would then seep into our apartment for days). Sometimes, people are just rude and inconsiderate, and usually, talking to them about it or getting someone else involved only makes things worse. With only 2 months to go, I’d just keep taking my shower and ignore it – they’ll be gone soon enough! If anything, I’d say something to the landlord. Even if they don’t do anything, there will be documentation (maybe an email or letter is best).
Post # 9
Ignore it! Keep your daily routine like usual. What you do in your own apartment is your business.
Post # 10
I’ll be on the outside here…..but seriously….I’d be a little ticked of too if every morning I am losing pressure and hot water when I shower. I have a hard enough time getting up in the morning and a hot shower is about all that gets me out of bed haha. I doubt hes mat AT you, but probably just the situation that is constant and he cant catch a break. I wouldn’t take it personally at all. Also….whoever set that apartment up did a shotty job is 2 apartments using water at the same time cause the pressure and heat to change. Also, who pays for the water? Is it all covered in the rent or do you get a bill for heating he water? if the pressure gets lowered when 2 people use it, then its coming through the same pipes and there isnt a very good split betwen the apartments….just a thought. We lived in an apartment were we actually paid for the washer and dryer and all the hallway and porch lights….once we figured that out we were none to happy. <br /><br />Don’t talk to the other tenant, just talk to the landlord about the water pressure situation and nont the other tenants behavior.
Post # 11
anonybee0810: The walks were thin at my last apartment, and twice a day, I’d hear one loud, long male groan, followed by running water coming from the unit upstairs. One day, as I was going to my car, I ran into someone I know, and it turned out yhat he was my upstairs neighbor. Mortified.Two yeats later & I still need the brain bleach.
In regards to your situation, if he hasn’t said anything to you directly, I’d let it go, unless you’re willing to re-work your shower schedule to accommodate him. Otherwise, there really isn’t a point.
Post # 12
anonybee0810: You need to talk to him because together you should be going to your landlord. Two squeaky wheels are louder than one squeaky wheel.
It doesn’t seem like a big deal to you but if you were losing water pressure in the middle of your shower every morning you would be annoyed to right? I think in the short term you should work out a schedule of some sort. Unfortunately when you live in apartments and share resources like plumbing systems you need to work together rather than be “that neighbour”.
Post # 13
Ugh. If he’s having an issue, he should change his routine. He’s acting like a child. That being said, maybe he’s going through something really hard in his life, right now, and he just has a shorter fuse, at the moment. I really like the idea of shouting back that you have to bathe. Maybe note that your office dress code requires that you not smell! I like this option mostly because it makes me chuckle, and maybe it’ll make you chuckle. Otherwise, I’d just ignore it. Maybe get a shower radio to help tune him out.
Post # 14
anonybee0810: Since you’re nonconfrontational and the guys next door are out in 2 months, I say just let it go. Don’t let their child-like temper tantrums bother you. They have a problem with it, they can speak to the landlord. It’s not your issue to work around their wants/needs, you are paying your rent and using your utilities. You have a job to be at and life is a timed schedule in the mornings. They’ll either learn to live with it for the next 2 months or speak to the landlord to have this resolved.
As a tenant yourself (in addition to your neighbors), it wouldnt hurt to tell the landlord the situation of low water pressure in the mornings, in hopes that maybe it can be resolved for the future for all residents (^^^ reaffirming the whole 2 squeaky wheel as mentioned by PP).
Post # 15
I would just ignore it. He is being a jerk but sometimes that’s just how people are.