Post # 1
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
Hi Bees!
Not engaged yet…but thinking ahead! I’m currently getting my Masters degree (MSW) and will start an internship in the next few months. Still unsure as to where I will be placed, but some possibilities include working with disadvantaged children, homeless women/children, or a community health center.
I’ve already picked out my engagement ring (2.5 radiant cut moissanite) but considering that it is a somewhat flashy ring, I don’t know how appropriate it would be to wear when working with these populations. The last thing I want to do is look over-the-top or have a shiny ring on my finger when the people I could be working with are struggling to feed themselves or their kids. Basically, I don’t want to make clients feel uncomfortable. So I was thinking of either wearing a plain silver band, or getting a Qalo band to wear instead, and keep the engagement ring for the weekends.
Boyfriend doesn’t like the idea of the Qalo ring, but thinks a small high-quality CZ could be the way to go.
What do you all think? Am I overthinking? All comments and suggestions welcome!
Thank you 🙂
And for reference, here are the rings I mentioned –
Moissanite engagement ring: https://www.moissaniteco.com/emeraldradiant-forever-one-engagement-ring-with-claw-prongs-p-24780.html
Qalo: https://qalo.com/products/qalo-womens-lilac-laurel-silicone-ring?variant=34008053007
CZ ring: https://www.etsy.com/listing/473162498/925-sterling-silver-1ct-simulated?ref=hp_rv
Post # 2
Member
1368 posts
Bumble bee
I think it is a wise and mature choice to have a plain band as a stand in, in your situation. A silver band is subtle and classic, and you can’t go wrong. Personally I’m not a fan of the QALO type rings as they are too chunky and brightly coloured for my liking, but whatever you prefer. I totally think you’re right to be thinking that it’s inappropriate to be wearing a flashy big ring in your area of work.
FWIW I don’t even wear my e-ring to work (I’m a teacher), and it’s a 0.65 moissy. It looks flashy on my tiny finger IMO and I hate students and other people remarking on it! I’ve been a plain wedding band girl for 95% of the 4 years I’ve ben married :p
Post # 3
Member
630 posts
Busy bee
catlover13 : If it were me, I would wear a plain band, or just your wedding band when you get it.
Post # 4
Member
2717 posts
Sugar bee
catlover13 : Interesting post! Normally I’d say you’re thinking too much about this but I do think that a 2.5 ct ring will catch a lot of attention. I don’t know if it will alienate you from your clients or put off some of them from you. I do think a plain white gold band is more approachable and wouldn’t garner so much attention/questions from clients. I would probably just wear a plain white gold band at work if you felt uncomfortable.
Post # 5
Member
6377 posts
Bee Keeper
I’m currently wearing a fake ring since I’m pregnant. I wasn’t worried about showing off, so I got a berricle ring, which I love and am getting a ring designed after it.
I prefer the high quality CZ if you’re not going for a plain band.
Post # 6
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
MrsSnowMountain : Thank you for your input!
Post # 7
Member
1368 posts
Bumble bee
pinkcorsage : That’s nice and works for you, but the whole point is that OP doesn’t want to be wearing a large or attention-grabbing ring. Yours are lovely but I would say equally inappropriate as the OP’s real ring, for her situation.
catlover13 : To be totally honest I think the CZ stand-in is not much less flashy than your real ring. Play it safe, go with the band. The whole point of a stand in, in your case, is to be understated. I think your BF is not quite getting your logic fully 😉
Post # 8
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
texasgal747 : I was also thinking of just wearing the wedding band! Still a little blingy…but pretty understated when compared to the engagement ring. Thanks for your input!
Post # 9
Member
3324 posts
Sugar bee
I’d probably just do the band.
Post # 10
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
somathemagical : Yep! You hit the nail on the head…alienating myself or my clients from me would be awful! I also know I would feel uncomfortable with clients asking about my ring (or just getting too personal in general) as the focus is supposed to be on them/therapy. Thank you for your input!!
Post # 11
Member
5663 posts
Bee Keeper
catlover13 : I would just wear a plain band.
Post # 12
Member
322 posts
Helper bee
Honestly if I saw someone with the silicone ring I wouldn’t assume they’re engaged, I would just think it was a fashion thing. I think a smaller stone would work better, maybe smaller than a ct, or a plain band.
Post # 13
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
MrsSnowMountain : Haha! My boyfriend was poking fun at me yesterday as we were discussing this! In his line of work seeing women with flashier rings wouldn’t raise an eyebrow…but with social work it certainly would!
Post # 14
Member
6377 posts
Bee Keeper
MrsSnowMountain : I just remove my picture from my response for your comment. However I flat out said in my post that I wasn’t going for a smaller look since I wasn’t worried about it. And that if she didn’t want the plain band that she should go for the CZ ring from the rings she listed.
Post # 15
Member
1213 posts
Bumble bee
I would do a plain band. Not the silicone ring. That is very thoughtful and wise of you to consider those that you will be working with.