(Closed) Starting Pre-Cana Friday — What to Expect?

posted 6 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
1766 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

Our pre cana was also done by the deacon and his wife. We had to stand up in the beginning and say in front of the group what we loved about our fiance/e, then in the very end we all got up, looked our fiance/e in the eyes, and simultaneously repeated the “engagement vows” to our respective SO that the deacon told us. That was about it for interaction. There was no role play, no questions and answers. The rest of pre cana was very much like a lecture; The deacon or his wife talked, we listened.

Post # 4
6248 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 1900

Our pre-Cana was very much about each couple.  I was worried about ice breakers and talking to the group about personal things, but we did none of that, thankfully.  There were guest speakers and we each had workbooks to fill out with our SO.  Then there was time after each exercise to go over your answers with your SO (and only your SO).  We didn’t have to share anything or have conversations with anyone else.  It was actually very intimate even though we were in a room full of strangers.  I realized how my Fiance and I are on the same page.

Post # 5
95 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

We had a great experience at our Pre Cana class a couple weekends ago.  It was all day on a Saturday from 8:30 am to 4:30 pm and we all attended the 4:30 pm mass together.  I was a bit nervous too because I thought we would be the oldest couple there (I’m 32 and Fiance is 36) and the only couple with a baby already. 

There were about 14 other couples there and about 6 married couples who were our guides.  They broke us engaged couples into groups of 3.  All the groups went into different rooms with one married couple.  Once in the room we had a great ice breaker.  The married couple told us we were selected to be in the same group together because we all had one thing in commom, we all had a child already. That made us relax and feel comfortable right away.  We each had a daughter between 1 and 2 years old so we related a lot to each other. 

 The guide would ask us questions like, what we expect from Pre Cana, communicating with each other, what we felt the marriage of sacrament was, etc.  We would be with the small group for about 20 minutes and talk about one topic, then we would go back to the main room with all 14 couples and listen to a small talk from one of the married couples for about 15 minutes.  They would talk about how long they have been married and their experience communicating and compromise.  We would then be given a questionnaire to fill out  with Fiance only and we could go anywhere in the church building or attached school to complete it for about 10 minutes.  We would then meet back up with our small group.  That is how it was all day.  So the day went by really fast and it was fun! 

In the small group they made us turn to our Fiance one at a time and tell them what we loved about them.  Fiance and I started tearing up when it was our turn.  I don’t know how we are going to get through the ceremony!  At the end they made us write a love letter to each other and address the envelope to Fiance.  They collected them and are going to mail them back to us the week of our wedding!

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