(Closed) Starting to feel like it's never going to happen

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
102 posts
Blushing bee

awww I’m sorry. This used to be me as well. I think a lot of girls go through it when they know he has or is looking to buy a ring. Is there any way he would give you a timeline? All I wanted to know at the time was WHEN ABOUTS is this happening!  Once I knew he was planning on doing it in 2012 I could back off a little and enjoy just living together.

Do you guys live together yet? That may change his point of view.

Post # 5
1082 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

It never makes any sense to me why men purchase engagement rings if they are not ready?

I am sorry he is making you wait.

Post # 6
106 posts
Blushing bee

@treacle-tart:  I’m sure you haven’t done anything – maybe he just needs more time (or whatever men need when they do this sort of thing).

I bet he’ll propose when you least expect it, but I’m sorry he has you feeling this way. 🙁

Post # 7
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

Your profile says you’re 20 is that correct? 🙂 may I ask how old he is is?


It is possible that he felt ready when he bought the ring but after thinking about it for a bit (maybe when the honeymoon phase started to end) he realised what a massive commitment marriage is. It’s not a bad thing that he’s not taking marriage lightly. And I do think that this man would like to propose to you one day, don’t think it has anything to do with you that he isn’t ready right this moment, it’ll almost certainly be about how he feels about himself 🙂 hope you feel better soon x

Post # 8
557 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@treacle-tart:  Better wait for him to be 100% sure right? It would be worse if he proposed and then get cold feet.

He already has the ring, that’s a good indicator that he wants to marry you, I would just forget about the thing and enjoy your relationship, the time will come 😛 


Post # 9
7564 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

I’m sorry you’re feeling frustrated. However, I think it’s best to be patient. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t talk to him about it though. It’s important that you guys can have an open and honest talk about your future. If he continues to avoid the talk I would have to seriously rethink moving in. 


Post # 10
700 posts
Busy bee

@treacle-tart:  awww, soo sorry your going through this!!! At least he’s bought the ring, and thats the most frustrating part, is knowing it’s there, i’d much rather be super surprised then go through months, years of hurt, bitter feelings. men move in their own way. their own, stupid way. patience to the spider …

Post # 11
1 posts

@treacle-tart: I don’t think you need to worry so much, he’s probably waiting to put all the details together and didn’t wanted to propose when everyone else was doing that at the same time. The element of surprise is important to! 

Having that said, I do understand your feeling…I’ve been with my bf for almost 6 years (living together for 4 and I even moved countries for him) and starting to wonder if it will ever happen…I guess you can feel lost in this especially when everyone around you is taking that next step and is moving forward.

I’m sure it will happen soon for you, he’s got the ring and in the end the wait will be worthwhile 🙂



Post # 12
2573 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@dannielle89:  +1

I don’t understand it either. Hang in there, OP.

Post # 13
242 posts
Helper bee

aww sorry thats dissapointing….last weekend my bf(drunk) told me something along the lines of the ring was being shipped, yet when I told him yesterday to let me know of any problems he might have with a package hes acted as if he had no idea what Im talking about, so Im a bit confused…

I just feel like most men dont really get the excitement that us girls do, I mean, yea, we are the ones getting the ring but they are also expressing to the world the kind of love they have for us…which I would HOPE they would want

Post # 15
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

@treacle-tart:  see, he is very very young still and possibly just realised that suddenly (I do know young men that are married so i don’t think you’ll necessarily be waiting for super ages).


I do think its super annoying when men buy a ring and then just hang around not doing anything with it but I can understand a little in this case (perhaps). Give it a little while for things to settle down and then maybe think about asking him where he stands, in the meantime air your frustrations on the bee (since being on here I’ve realised that I’m actually quite young and am more comfortable in my relationship because of it, it’s too easy to wrap ourselves in the people around us) <3


if it’s any consolation, your relationship and your man seem to be a lot further ahead than many girls our age 🙂

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