(Closed) Starting to get a little frustrated :-(

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
9126 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

Oh yikes!  Usually I’d would say to just chillax, it’s coming… but it seems like this will really make or break your work situation.  I think you should just talk to him – tell him you don’t need to know exactly what’s up if he’s planning something, but that you need to figure out the engagement business in the next couple weeks or your company sends you off to the boonies.  (This is assuming that you two are really both excited about getting engaged and you’re not pressuring him into it…)

Post # 4
15041 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Engaged or not, I think you should make the decision that is best for you.  Just because you are engaged, doesnt mean you need to stay put where you are and be physically there together.  Engaged or not, if you are commited to each other, 2 years would be nothing if this opportunity is really that important and beneficial to you.

Post # 5
1352 posts
Bumble bee

Is he 100% aware of all of this? 

If you think he isn’t, you should have a calm, nice conversation about it. I get the surprise thing, but this is your LIFE you’re taking about, and that comes first.

If he is aware, then either he’ll do it, or he’s not ready and whatever, and either case you’ll have your answer.

Post # 6
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Well… I don’t know where you went ring shopping or what their production timeline was, but we bought our ring in the middle of January and it wasn’t finished until the middle of March. So it could be that he doesn’t even have the ring yet.

Have you reiterated your concerns to him? Explain that you are fine with getting engaged without a ring and setting a date but it needs to happen asap if it’s going to happen.

Post # 8
1352 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
@sweet5k:  Then honestly I think it’s out of your hands. He is probably either unsure or he will propose. It sucks for you, but either way you just have to sit back and take his proposal / non-proposal as the answer. In either case, you’re going to be heading toward a new exciting chapter in your life, so be happy about that!

This is an awful situation, but be reasonable. You don’t want him to be pressured into marriage, because that will lead to bad consequences down the road. And if you’re meant to be, you’ll survive the long distance get married when he’s ready. Just don’t get too focused on the proposal, think about how exciting it will be to move to a new city and further your career. I suggest now thinking too much about either possibility. 

The ball is in his court, and there’s nothing you can do. Your answer will come in (only!) three weeks, so just do some activities to stay distracted! 


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