Post # 1
I’m on month 4 of TTC and the shine has worn off. I was really excited and hopeful the first 3 months, but now I’m started to get frustrated and less excited for the “trying” part. I’m not worried and realize it is still early, but I’m starting to get more negative. Part of the problem is that my cycles are really long 31 -39 days, although i think they’re starting to regulate closer to 31 but it takes so long to get to the right time of the month to try again.
Is anyone else in the same boat? How do you continue to stay positive?
Post # 3
I’m right there rowing beside you in that boat! I went off the pill at the beginning of August and my cycles have been on the long side (pretty much same range as yours). It is hard to stay motivated and positive…I guess I just keep reminding myself that it will happen when the time is right.
Post # 4
I went off of depo-provera (missed my shot) in July … I just had the lightest period ever, the first since coming off of depo! I was totally prepared for it to take about 6 months to get on track with a cycle though, and we aren’t in too much in a rush to get pregnant … we are enjoying just being married, and the anticipation of pregnancy when the time is right! We both are of the opinion, that we might worry about in in 6 more months, when our 1st anniversary gets close …
Post # 5
I was in the same boat. My cycles did not regulate when I went off BC (which was in March 09 I think). It could be anywhere from 45 – 60 days. I was so bummed that we were only getting 1 chance for what would normally be 2. We didn’t technically start trying until June 09. It took until November for the planets to align 🙂 By that pregnancy test my attitude was anything but hopeful – but we got our miracle.
It’s super frustrating when your cycle is screwy because no only are you bummed your not pregnant but your bummed with how your body is working (or “not” working). Don’t give up hope!! 🙂
It helped me to think of a bright side to getting pregnant later. For me every month it didn’t work out meant ‘well the bright side is I’ll get the snowboard some this winter’. Or whatever. ‘We’ll have time to save XX more dollars before the baby gets here’. Any little thing that might be a positive – even though it’s not the results you really want!
Post # 6
Just keep reminding yourself that it takes somewhat like 80% of couples up to 8 (i think?) to conceive and you’re still in the green zone. It’s frustrating when it seems like a lot of people are first monthers, but it’s really not common. I’m a numbers and statistics kind of girl, and that sort of stuff is always (oddly) comforting to me.
Post # 7
Yes i’m that boat too. It’s frustrating because three .. THREE people i’m very close to, not TTC all just conceived in the last three months. I’m from a family that boasts .. just having to shake hands with a man and they are preg … ugh it’s frustrating. it’s nice to know there are a few others out there in a similar situation.
Post # 8
i totally understand what you’re going through. i went off bc in may after 7 years of being on the pill. since my husband and i are both relatively young (im 27, he’s 30) and healthy, i assumed it would only take a month or two of BD’ing more often to get pregnant. but that didn’t happen at all. it took 8 months. what made it worse was that since i wasn’t used to getting PMS because of years on the pill, i felt like i could be pregnant EVERY month. my symptoms seemed so extreme compared to being on the pill that there were a few times i was so sure i was pregnant. it was so frustrating. and even though it’s the first thing people say about ttc, it’s really hard to not starting feeling like it’s a chore.
it wasn’t until i stopped trying so hard that we actually got pregnant. i know people always say that, and it’s not like you can try to not try, but i say just relax and know that when it’s meant to happen it will. even if it’s months or years from now, you will be more prepared and it will be that much more exciting!
Post # 9
Have you tried using preseed? I got pregnant the first month I used it. I was using OPKs so I would know exactly when I was about to ovulate. Do you chart your cycles?
Post # 10
@undeniable: I’m not charting and I’m not planning to because that would definitely make me go crazy thinking about it even more. I’m paying attention to everything and keeping track and trying to relax about it. I am seriously considering the Clear Blue Easy Fertility monitor though…
@harmonyeee: I was on BC for 11 years and I am so used to being “regular” I just thought I would be. I was also almost completely regular since my first period before BC. Oh well…it looks like I’m almost there. It seems like most of the ppl on here say there doctors tell them to wait 3 months before actively trying so maybe #4 will do it!
A little extra background, I’m 30, Darling Husband is 41…so I feel a bit of pressure to have a baby sooner or later because of his age. Maybe this is stupid, but I’d really like the kid to graduate before he’s 60!
Post # 11
Don’t necessarily throw out the idea of charting. It can tell you alot about your cycle and actually really help you. But yes, there are actually quite a few of us on here having to take some extra time. We are on month #9 and start Clomid next month. Yes I have some other things going on, but I also have a friend who is perfectly healthy going through the same thing is on the same time frame as we are. Try not to let it get you down, that can actually only make things worse if you stress. Good luck! I’ve learned through it this year that it will really happen when it is suppose to.
Post # 12
Thank you for saying this! I feel the same way and it helps to know I’m not the only one. It seems like everyone around me is getting pregnant and it is very frustrating. I geuss I always thought it would be easier! Good luck to you!
Post # 13
You don’t necessarily need to learn how to chart all out, there’s 2 signs that your body will use to tell you your about to and now ovulating… one is even optional! No need to spend money on testing kits when your body is yelling at you loud and clear 🙂
Just learn how to read your cervical fluid (seriously, it’s as easy as just paying attn when you use the restroom) and if you want (again, optional) learn about your cervical positioning.
But, I wouldn’t throw the idea out, it’s no different than ovulation predictor kits, only… you’ll have better more complete information. In the unlikely event that there was an issue, you would also find out more quickly than just waiting around and nothing happening.
Post # 14
@JaneyD: That’s not silly… the older we get the more complications we as humans have, it’s not a bad thing for you to want your husband to be “young” and healthy when it’s very important for him to be.
Also, while it seems to be “regular” on BC, it’s a “faux” regular. You don’t have a real period on BC, yes, you have one, but it’s not a “real” one… if that makes any sense, lol. Even if you were regular before, you’ve been tricking your body for the past 11 years… give it some time 🙂
But, especially now as you’re coming off BC, charting really may help you learn how your body is re-regulating itself… and after the baby you can even use it to avoid pregnancy so you don’t have to go back on BC.
Post # 15
@KLP2010: I totally get the cervical fluid signs. They are pretty clear and obvious and I haven’t had to do any “investigating” to find them : )
I started the whole charting post under my previous screen name so I am well-informed, just don’t want to do it…yet…at least.
I think what I have decided for this month is to only try when we really want to (keeping in mind the best days). Last month was just too forced to be fun and if it’s “fun” I think it will be more successful. I bought some cute lingerie on Ideeli… And we decided that we would switch off “turns” of initiating to make it more playful instead of me saying “we really need to tonight.” Unromantic!
Post # 16
In light of your last post, that was going to be my lame suggestion:) Stop focusing on procreating and start focusing on have sex with your husband 🙂 Alot. LOL!