(Closed) starving bridesmaid, no vegetarian food offered at wedding

posted 7 years ago in Food
Post # 122
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@everyheart:  I agree with it being suspicious, although after seeing some of the posts/menus on this thread, it doesn’t surprise me anymore if a bride chose to only offer two sides (with only one being vegetarian-friendly) at an event.

Post # 123
Member
954 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I always wondered the history behind the rule that you have a year to give a wedding gift.

 

Now I think I know where that originated.  Some arrogant bride thought it was beneath her to provide a vegetarian meal to her maid of honor.

 

 

Post # 124
Member
846 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

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@lilbluebird:  anyone CAN eat something unless it kills them, and i’m pretty sure vegetarians wouldn’t die if they ate meat. just because they might say “i can’t eat meat,” doesn’t really mean that they physically CAN’T, they just CHOOSE not to. 

Post # 125
Member
1497 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@lilbluebird:  It wouldn’t surprise me generally (that is why I always pack myself something), but it does for a casual BBQ.

Post # 126
Member
1497 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

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@mrs_brownie:  +1. I agree. Even for the short time I was vegan, I was flexible as a guest at an event. I have a great book by Jeffrey Moussaieff Masson called, “The Face on Your Plate.” He is a STRICT vegan for a variety of reasons. But even HE says that he becomes flexible when he is a guest, because he doesn’t want to be “one of those people” that turns people away from veganism.

Post # 127
Member
3625 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@mrs_brownie:  While technically that is true, it’s commonly accepted that vegetarianism is a dietary restriction, not a preference. Most vegetarians do not just throw their non-meat habits out the window the first chance they get.

With your logic that someone can count as being able to eat something as long as it doesn’t kill them, then we can eat a lot of things, including each other (i.e. cannibalism).

Post # 128
Member
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

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@everyheart:  

Exactly! 

Life is short and in the grand scheme of things I don’t see this as a huge deal in life. 

 

I say just be proactive and bring something.

 

Post # 129
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

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@cdncinnamongirl:  oh I know 🙂 i think it added just a touch of personality to my post. 

 

Post # 130
Member
543 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@vegetariangirl:  i would mention it to the bride, there may be other people coming who feel the same way! we are doing bbq and i did not even think about one of our vegan guests! so our catering is going to make them a salad! 

 

Post # 131
Member
3728 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: City, State

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@mrs_brownie:  I always thought this too. Then I worked with a bunch of vegetarians and my secretary made risotto with beef stock. They were so sick and didn’t know it was beef stock. If you don’t eat meat for several years, you can get sick off of it.

Post # 132
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

My aunt is the only vegetarian attending Our wedding.I just requested a special meal for her.I can understand both positions. Talk to your friend, she will probably make separate accommodations for you. I would offer to bring a veggie burger for Myself.hopefully she will tell you that separate arrangements have been made.

Post # 133
Member
2703 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Oh FFS!

Coleslaw =/= a meal

Coleslaw + bread + potatoe salad =/= a meal.

As good hosts, the bride and groom should make every effort to make sure that there is something for everyone to eat, and enough of that something to make a decent meal out of it.

Is it expected that the bride and groom accomodate every possible dietary restriction?  No.  But a vegetarian option is a pretty standard thing and I don’t understand why a wedding, or any party for that matter, wouldn’t have it.  It’s not a super restricting diet and most caterers will provide a handful of individual vegetarian meals at no extra cost. 

I just don’t understand how you wouldn’t try and accomdate someone if you knew that had a certain dietary restriction.  It’s part of being a good host.

 OP, just ask the bride if there is anyway to get a vegetarian meal.  I’m sure you guys can work something out.

Post # 134
Member
1652 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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@mrs_brownie:  I see your point, but wouldn’t you as a hostess to your wedding guests wish to avoid forcing them to eat something they have chosen not to?

Post # 135
Member
1652 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

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@everyheart: I didn’t mean to be rude in my reply at all. I was just curious, and my mentioning the example of the sit down dinner was just trying to set up a scenario (as I had at my wedding) where it would have been inconsiderate to ask guests to bring their own food. I think my post was perfectly polite. 

Post # 136
Member
1430 posts
Bumble bee

@vegetariangirl:  I’m really surprised there is no salad, mash potoatoes or anything else you can eat. 

At the end of the day it is her wedding. She is paying for the food and you know since your married that you can’t accomodate everyone. Honestly, if I was in your shoes yeah I would be annoyed but would never say anything to her. I’d just suck it up, and pack some food to eat. It is just one night. 

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