(Closed) Stateside destination weddings

posted 8 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
27 posts
  • Wedding: December 2010

I’m getting married in another state, because the majority of my family lives there. I live pretty far away from my large, italian family and FH only has a handful of relatives. It isn’t easy, to be honest. I’ve had to visit twice and will have to visit once more before the wedding to have the final dress fitting. But, having family there definitely helps.

I would only do a destination wedding (other than my situation), if it was very small and intimate. Otherwise, the difficulties outweigh the benefits.

Post # 4
1871 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

I am!

well right now, it sorta sucks because my venue is falling through, but in general, it feels like general wedding planning that most people do. In our case, yes, it’s a destination wedding, but the planning wouldn’t be all that different had we chosen to have our wedding in Los Angeles (where we’re both from) and planned it from NYC (where we live). The one thing is perhaps not seeing the place in person or tasting the food, but the internet *can* be a very handy tool. You’re probably pretty savvy, but FWIW:

-when looking at venues, try searching the venue’s name and “blog” and “wedding” and see if anyone’s blogged a wedding that took place there. The pictures included in blogs are usually much more comprehensive AND more accurate than the pictures furbished by the actual venue. You can also try “wedding photographer” and the venue’s name because a lot of photographers also post wedding pictures and mention where the wedding took place.

-if you can afford one, a wedding planner can really really help–they know the market for the location and will help you streamline the process and make sure all your ducks are in a row on the day of the event.

-take advantage of all the review sites–citysearch, yelp, zagat, etc. for things like caterers, hotels, bakers, restaurants, etc.

-if the site is located near people you know (and people who love you very much) consider asking them if you can rely on them as the testers

-relinquish a little control when it comes to incidental things–like decor. It’ll make your life a lot easier if you sacrifice being particular in the name of availability, convenience, and reliability–it’s easier to choose from a florist’s exisiting designs from their portfolio than to telecommute to come up with a totally brand-new design.

Post # 5
3316 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

We did.  In our case, none of the local jurisdictions had same-sex marriage at the time.  We therefore got married in Massachusetts.  We had an intimate ceremony at a synagogue there (only 12 guests), then took all our guests to Legal Sea Foods for lunch.  Three days later, we had an evening at-home reception with live music, dancing, an open bar, and a DIY fauxtobooth.

The planning was not all that tough.  The hardest part was finding a rabbi to marry us, given that NotFroofy is not Jewish.  We got several recommendations from local friends who had previously lived in the Boston area, but none of them would do it.  Finally, someone at one of the synagogues we contacted said that their rabbi wouldn’t do it, but gave us the name of a rabbi who would.  We checked that rabbi and his synagogue out on the Internet, then called him.

For our bouquets, we found a design from Teleflora that we liked, then called the Teleflora florist in the city in which we were getting married.

The luncheon was even easier.  We just booked the private dining room at the nearest Legal Sea Foods, and they took care of everything.

The hardest part was finding accommodations for everyone.  We wanted to find a house that would have enough room for all our guests (and the two dogs that were going to be there), so we could have things like dinner the night before there.  We found a house through Vacation Rentals by Owner (“VRBO“) that had a four-bedroom unit, a two-bedroom unit, and a one-bedroom unit.  We stayed in the one-bedroom with our dog, family stayed in the four-bedroom, and friends stayed in the two-bedroom with their dog.

More detailed information on our planning can be found in my bio.

Post # 6
6 posts
  • Wedding: September 2011

We live in NYC, my parents are in WV, his parents are in DC, and we are getting married in SC…sooo yes.  Haha. =)  My parents have a beach house in SC and luckily I have family (aunts, uncles, cousin who is a BM) who live there so they are being very helpful, but it does make things harder.  We just got down to visit venues last weekend and we finalized the venue and date TODAY!  My worry right now is we can’t get back there until the week between Christmas and New Year’s, and I am afraid that’s too late to book DJ, photog, etc. for our Oct. 1, 2011 date, but I really don’t think I can make those decisions without meeting the actual vendors! If anyone has great “planning from afar” suggestions – much appreciated!

Post # 7
7695 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

@Ember78: We did this. We live in Virginia and got married 10 hours away on a lake in Georgia. ALl of our guests had to drive at least an hour and a half and the majority of them had to fly to get there. It turned out to be exactly what we wanted!

Post # 8
1184 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i guess techinically our wedding could be considered this, since we’re getting married in baltimore, while we (and FI’s family) live in NY and my family is in DC, LA, and miami. baltimore is a city we like that is conveniently located in the middle of all those cities (and less than an hour from my parents). it’s annoying not being able to meet with people whenever we want, instead we have to cram like 10 things into a weekend when we visit. on the other hand, we’re hoping to make it a whole weekend event since most people are coming from out of town, and we’ll have events friday, saturday, and sunday. i defintely couldn’t have done this without the internet though. thank goodness for photographers’ blogs.

Post # 9
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

We’re gettig married in NC so its just 5 hours away 🙂 Been real simple too! Can’t imagine how tough it’d be trying to do this abroad – its so simple for us to communicate and visit our vendor

Post # 10
493 posts
Helper bee

Yes. We’re from Texas and getting married on a beach in Florida. We’ve been there once and fell in LOVE with the water and atmosphere. We wanted to do something different. So far planning is great. I’ve done a lot through The Knot and just simply emailing and asking lots of questions. No wedding planner or coordinator. We probably won’t be able to take a planning trip though. But we’ll see. It’s going to be small and intimate. About 20-30 people. We’re doing an after wedding “reception brunch”. No reception hall, DJ, dancing, really none of the traditional stuff. Just eat and go enjoy the city. Then a month later we’ll do a BIG reception in our hometown.

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