(Closed) Stay-At-Home… Wife?

posted 10 years ago in Emotional
Post # 47
Member
369 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

there is NOTHING wrong with that!!!!

Im not gonna lie, I really just skimmed over other peoples responses. (sorry) But –

before I met my Fiance, i LOVED work. I wanted the carreer and a “family” second. But now, its totally different. I have always been a “home maker” and I am very organized and like to keep things clean.

But anymore, it just seems like I would LOVE life if I could just keep the house clean, make dinner every night, and just please my husband. It may sound “stepfordy” but since we became (will become) a family. Thats just what I want. 🙂

Hopefully one day it could happen. :p

Hopefully it will happen for YOU!!!

Post # 48
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@KatyElle:  lol this one isn’t about motherhood, but wife-hood.  Working wives versus Stay at home wives.

What do you guys think about this younger generation of men?  I dont really think they play with the stay at home wife stuff anymore.  I know my Fiance and all of his friends put value on high powered working women.  If I told my Fiance I wanted to stay at home and take care of him, he would (after laughing extensively) tell me he can take care of himself and take my booty to work. 

I dont know if this is a good thing or a bad thing.  it’s not that he doesn’t value taking care of me, but he would just be like what the hell are you doing, lol.  We can get a maid to clean or something. 

I think we are seeing the fierce rise, and subsequent romantization, of power couples, where both husband and wife are seriously high achieving career wise and still have good relationships.

Post # 49
Member
7321 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@Aubergold: Please refer to my initial comments regarding being a Stay-At-Home Wife. My comment came from the above comments where the argument, as always, turns to “I don’t think SAHMs should get paid” and “It’s harder to be a working mom.” It just makes me laugh. I know what the discussion is supposed to be about.

Post # 50
Member
4497 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Rock it if you can!

I’m a stay at home fiance and soon to be wife. I have university degrees and a great resume,but for right now it is whats best for our family. Don’t worry once you start cleaning the entire house on a schedule, meal prep, errands, cooking, bills etc you will remain busy!

I plan on doing some part time work after my wedding soon just to put away and put towards some student loans. If you have flexibility , its the biggest blessing!

 

Post # 51
Member
12275 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@MrsMcGyro: I agree…

View original reply
@MsGolightly: if thats what you want and can do it, thwn who cares what other people think, its not their life.  Just tell them if it’s not for them, theyn dont do it, but it is for you andyoure happy.

For me, as much as I hate going to work and even though we can afford to live on half our salary, I couldn’t do it.  Being able to make it by and live today, is not good enough.  We’re looking at a much bigger picture.  We want that nice early comfortable retirement,  My husband isnt exactly loving work either, and my not working would mean he has to work longer before retirement.  Would it be great to be able to be a Stay-At-Home Wife, yup.  Realistic, no way, not unless he suddenly doubled his salary.  Even then, I would still probably work cause that would still mean all the more money we could save toward retirement.  Could I be a SAHM? Maybe…the only way I would not work anymore, if it didnt make sense anymore.. .like if child care was costing more than I could make.

Post # 52
Member
2396 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

@CorgiTales: I really liked your original post and I agree 100%.

Post # 53
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@KatyElle: O…..k……  S.O.R.R.Y gees. 

Post # 54
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@Aubergold: “If I told my Fiance I wanted to stay at home and take care of him, he would (after laughing extensively) tell me he can take care of himself and take my booty to work.”

Same here. DH values having two steady incomes higher than a sparkling clean, seasonally decorated house.

Post # 55
Member
924 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

No way, not for me. I would be bored. I clean, pay bills etc now and commute to law school 2hrs one way. If I didn’t have the commute and only the cleaning, cooking, bills I know I’d be bored. I enjoy working and interacting with different types of people on a daily basis besides my tv! If I hated my job, I’d go for a career change. Fiance always tells me if I end up hating being a lawyer when I graduate, he will fully support me to do something different until I find what’s my passion. My mom was a Stay-At-Home Mom and I LOVED it. She was always there when I got home! So, I’m not devaluing it in any way, but it’s not for me.

Post # 56
Member
7321 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@Aubergold: No need to jeez me, when someone implies that I’m missing the point of a discussion I like to clarify. It’s not that serious.

 

Post # 57
Member
1258 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

@Eva Peron: “Don’t worry once you start cleaning the entire house on a schedule, meal prep, errands, cooking, bills etc you will remain busy!”

But those are things that need to get done whether you work or not. Somehow we manage to do both.

Post # 58
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@KatyElle: you know what, Im gonna chalk this to, misinterpretation of tone cause I am a bit off by your ‘writing’ tone and dont want to be.  I was not implying that you were missing the point out of idiocy.  I truly thought you thought we were talking about moms and was just tying to help; I thought your reply was a bit much given that.  But nevermind. 

Post # 59
Member
485 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Nothing wrong with wanting to be a homemaker. It can be very fulfilling. Yes, some people will scoff at that and some will pass judgement on you. But that doesn’t matter. It’s your life and your (and your FI’s) choice – no one else’s.

Post # 60
Member
869 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@AprilJo2011: I know!  Fiance will live in a pile of mess as long as he has money to eat out and buy his electronic gadgets, lol. 

Post # 61
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

First off, to each their own and you gotta do what’s right for you and the heck with what anyone else thinks.

I could be a stay at home wife (we don’t plan on ever having kids) if I wanted. My huband sees me come home literally crying every night from a job I absolutely hate and he’s offered for me to just quit. But why should he have to suffer at his job every day just so I can not work? His job’s not fun either. I would feel so selfish. I also don’t want to ever be dependent on anyone to take care of me.  I like knowing that I could support myself should something happen to my husband.

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