Post # 1
I haven’t really seen any postings on this, but when you get married is anyone going to be a stay at home wife? I am graduating this December and then doing volunteer work for 3 months with a child life specialist, the following month I’ll get married. Fiance and I have talked and there is really no need for me to get a job, he has a very well paying and secure job with the company he’s with, so really the only way I’d work is if I wanted to, and honestly I’d rather just volunteer a few days a week. Is this too much of a cop-out? Anyone else being a stay-at-home wife.
Post # 3
You may be interested in this thread and this link regarding finances.
Post # 4
I couldn’t be a stay at home wife. I have been going to school exclusively since July and I’m going stir crazy. My husband makes a decent amount but once I start working, it means we will have more in savings and more fun money. I would rather do that than be at home and not being able to go out and have fun together.
Post # 5
I have a stay at home hubby! He works for himself and manages his own portfolio so there is no need for him to get a job and I just work because I think I would go stir crazy staying at home. It works out great! He can pick up (I help clean), runs errands, take our kitties to vet appointments, pay bills, grocery shop, etc. so that when I come home we have more quality time together. I say more power to you!
Post # 6
I was a stay at home girlfriend for a period of about 6 months between when i graduated law school and when i found a job. Finances were certainly not an issue as FH makes very good money. But I was just going crazy after about 3 weeks. I became so needy and clingy with FH. My day sort of revolved around him getting home from work. There’s only so many things you can occupy yourself with all day when you’re alone, (my friends worked). I was miserable. So no, this really isn’t an option for me.
Post # 7
I am so burned out at work right now that that idea sounds great to me. I often jokingly ask my Fiance if he’d be okay with it, but it isn’t really an option for us. Plus, despite the burn out, I’d miss my job if I was away for too long.
Post # 8
@pren79 – thanks for the link, but we’re not planning on having children for at least 2 or 3 years after we get married, so I’m really asking about being just a wife
We both have a good amount of money we inherited, so money is a non-issue for us. The stir-crazy thing is what worries me which is why I have the volunteer-“job” lined up. I was really just curious if there would be any other stay at home wives out there???
Post # 9
I “work from home” but I don’t really have a lot of said work, so I’m basically a stay at home fiancee right now. Fiance and I both love it! I told him I’d go get a job after the wedding, but he really doesn’t want me to. I haven’t made a final decision just yet. We want to renovate the house, so the extra cash would be nice. Plus it feels kind of weird to be nearly 30 and home every day when all your friends are out working their butts off…. But honestly, I’m really happy! I love being home! I don’t know how I balanced everything with a fulltime job before. Or maybe I’ve just become a lot less efficient 😉
Post # 10
I couldn’t do it long term, because I’d go stir crazy – working from home I would love, but I would still need work. It would have to be pretty “meaty” (brainy/challenging) volunteer work for that to suffice, for me personally.
Going straight from college to being a Stay-At-Home Wife seems (IMO) pretty risky. Should anything happen (not only with your relationship, but even just with your FH’s job, say he lost his job), you’ll have no work history, no work references, no real hands-on networking in your field. Even if your volunteering was directly related to your work field, it’s still different than work experience. Your future social security payments will be basically nil, if you never work. I guess there are a lot of things to weigh, but if it works for you, there’s certainly nothing wrong with not working.
Post # 11
I think if you have the opportunity to stay home and your FI wants to support you then that is great! Especially volunteering with your free time, I think that is admirable. The rest of the time you can keep house, cook and take care of your man. Sounds fabulous to me but I definitely have more of a 1950’s mentality than most women I know and I love it and my man has ZERO complaints! My dream job is to be a house wife/ stay at home mom.
No cop out in my opinion. A marriage is a team effort, I don’t agree with needing your “own” finances.
Post # 12
@garbrielleelise: You can claim spousal payments for SS even if you don’t work but they are only half of your spouse’s payment I think. You can also do that if you divorce but you can’t get remarried.
Post # 13
You are so lucky!!! I would do it in a heartbeat.
Post # 14
Whoa! If I were you I’d be all over that!!! haha! I don’t mind my job but I would LOVE to not have to work!!! I’m jealous and I don’t mind admitting it!
Post # 15
I know that wouldn’t work for me. I go crazy without having a bazillion things to do, which is why I usually hae a couple jobs and I’ve been in grad school for the past 2.5 years. I don’t know how I’ll handle just having one job and no school and no wedding for most of the summer.
Post # 16
I think it would be boring if you didn’t have any children to run after (the most common reason for staying-at-home).
Maybe if you had a business that you could run out of the home – but I think not working and not having anything to do all day would be awfully lonely. Plus I’d feel like I’d have to ask to spend money.
My Fiance could support both of us but with both of us working we’re just saving my salary – so it’s nice to just add to our savings so we always have money when we need it. Plus in this economy even if his job is secure it doesn’t mean his company couldn’t fall on rough times and go under.
I love what I do so maybe that makes a difference. I also feel like it would be a waste of my money spent on education if I wasn’t working.