(Closed) Staying at home when you're newly married and have no kids

posted 4 years ago in No Kids
Post # 2
Member
1158 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Maybe she was feeling unfulfilled in her career? Maybe she really enjoys the duties of home making? Maybe she wanted the option to pursue non-profit work? Who really knows, but it doesn’t matter. It’s not your life and I’m not really sure why you are judging her for it. If you’re unhappy with having to work and are jealous (which is how your post comes across), work towards what would make you happy in your own life.

Post # 3
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

None of your beeswax, bee. You sound jealous.

Post # 4
Member
4286 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Post # 5
Member
7807 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Because “they’re having fun living the newlywed life” perhaps? Because she wants to, and she can?

Why do you care? If she worked would you also be annoyed thinking she was taking a job away from someone who really needed the money?

Post # 6
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

It sounds to me that dance is more fun, volunteer work is more fulfilling, and caring for parents is more important. It sounds like a pretty easy choice to me, compared to earning money she doesn’t need.

EDIT: OK, I misread the parents bit, but still it sounds like it’s what is better for her.

Post # 7
Member
224 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I would if I could. I would love to volunteer.

Post # 8
Member
7892 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Maybe she didn’t like her previous field of work. If they are both ok with it, I don’t think it really matters what you or I think about their arrangement.

Post # 11
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Education is never a waste of money, for one.  So don’t waste time feeling bad for her.  Lots of people enjoy learning.

 I would also do the same as her. I’d rather spend my time doing what I want than being chained to a desk for 35 hours a week, I’d be much happier.  Being happy is a benefit to marriage.  If she can make it happen, good for her.  Some people just don’t have the career drive, which is ok.  It’s no one else’s business.

Post # 12
Member
9520 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

If it works for them why do you care? 

Post # 13
Member
355 posts
Helper bee

I have 2 degrees and when DH & I got together I became a stay at home wife. I have a small income from an investment property & there’s no need for me to work. 

We planned on having kids in a few years and I didn’t see the point in trying to work my way up the ladder at a company that I know I won’t be with long term bc the plan was always to be a Stay-At-Home Mom.

I love staying at home, our house is always clean, we have homemade meals most nights, and neither of us feel overworked. It works for us.

Post # 14
Member
9396 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

You don’t have to get it, you just have to accept that it’s none of your business and be happy they’ve figured out a formula that makes them happy.

Some couples are swingers or polygamous, some couples fight all the time (and then, presumably, have lots of reconciliations), some couples choose to never have babies.  I don’t see myself ever doing any of those things, but if it makes them happy then good for them!

Post # 15
Member
1991 posts
Buzzing bee

If they make that much, they might value her contributing to the household more than her income. Just because she got a degree doesn’t mean she has to use it for a job if she doesn’t want to. She still learned and increased her education, so it’s not like a total waste. 

If my husband had a job that we could live super comfortably on one income, it might be more advantageous for me to stay at home and take care of the house, do things for my husband and overall make our lives more enjoyable. Making an little extra income might not be worth it with the tradeoff. 

Sounds like you value your education and professional life. Not everyone does and that’s okay. 

The topic ‘Staying at home when you're newly married and have no kids’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors