Post # 1
Fiance and I live in a smaller size, 2 bedroom apartment. It’s quite nice, very comfortable, and a few friends have visited and stayed with us here in the past. However for our wedding we feel like we cannot accomidate ALL of them, so we shouldn’t pick and choose who can stay with us and who should rent a hotel. Is this acceptable? We were thinking of not letting anyone stay at our apartment, and have gotten some really great deals on hotel rooms for our attendants. We cannot afford to pay for everyone’s rooms, however in the same situation (where we’ve been in friends weddings) we’ve paid for our rooms and it has not been an issue. (One hotel was nice enough to even give us a room rate of $60! We have paid hundreds to stay in hotels for some our attendants weddings.) Just wondering if any other bees have run into this or how you handled it.
Post # 3
@MrsD41503: I wouldn’t let anyone stay with us. I might see if local friends were willing to host nonlocal friends (and do all of the introductions if they didn’t know each other) but thats as far as I would go. I don’t think they should expect to be able to stay with you. You can mention something about wanting privacy on your wedding night and they should get the hint.
Post # 4
I think that is fair and perfectly understandable to not want to entertain (read nicely as deal with) anyone in the days leading up to the wedding.
Post # 5
I’m planning on renting a house for immediate family, they can chip in if they can. Also plan on having the wedding at said rented house. Anyways, it’s $1500-$2000 per week for a house that sleeps 10 (more if you include sofas or byo-beds) which for a week comes to aprox. $20-$30 per person per night so if you can find something similar that might be another option. Also, it might depend on who you’re having stay with you, someone very close (parents, siblings) & maybe lower income (students) shouldn’t cause any objections i.e. younger sibling or best friend still in college, etc.
Post # 6
I think it’s fine. You will be very busy and have way too much going on to host guests. Most people probably will expect to get a hotel room.
Post # 7
It’s not a family/friends reunion…. it’s your WEDDING and your wedding night should be all yours and yours alone! You only have ONE wedding “night”…..
Post # 8
I wasn’t sure if we were planning to get a room on our wedding night or if we’ll choose to come back to our apartment (probably get a room, though) – but I’d rather wait and decide later than feel like we HAVE to rent a room because we have guests. I think we did the right thing, hope there’s no hurt feelings.
PS….craziness, I was in a “friend” from college’s wedding…drove 4 hours with Fiance (who was then my bf) rented a room at a hotel, and she said it was my “duty” to stay with her the night before her wedding. Talk about awkward! I had to leave Fiance at the hotel I had just paid for and stay with her in a cramped, hot (no A/C) apartment and sleep on her couch! It was just the most awkward, uncomfortable expereince. And NOT FUN, that set the mood for the whole weekend, and it was a downer. I had the worst time at that wedding.
Post # 9
I haven’t run into anything similar but all I can say is I wouldn’t want to share my apartment with anyone during the weekend of my wedding. I would want to be able to relax and do whatever I want with or without my FI/DH without other people being there. It sounds perfectly reasonable to me.
Post # 10
One of my BMs has “put dibs” on my futon for herself and her Fiance (the same Bridesmaid or Best Man who asked for her Fiance to be in the wedding party and the one who is trying to buy a Bridesmaid or Best Man dress that isn’t anything like I want). Needless to say, it’s not happening. We have a one bedroom apartment that is tight to begin with.
We plan on blocking hotel rooms (at hopefully a discount) for our out-of-state guests. No one will be staying with us.
Post # 11
My Future Sister-In-Law thought she was going to stay at Fiance and I house for the wedding. She invited herself to stay with us. I may have sounded rude but I was so shocked that I blurted out the first thing that came to me. I said nobody will be staying at my house that weekend I need my space and me and future hubby are coming home on our wedding night. I got my point across and it was ackward but I haven’t been asked that question since. Plus I blocked out rooms at a nearby hotel for $60 a night I think that is super cheap. I think out of town guest should expect to pay for a hotel.
Post # 12
I agree, there is too much going on to try and play hosts to guests in your apartment and conduct a wedding!
Post # 13
WHAT A RELIEF! I’m so glad I found this board, I’m just SOOO HAPPY to have people to talk to about this.
I think $60 a night for a clean, nice, comfortable place to stay (and believe me, I’m quite picky – I checked out this hotel that I reserved a block of rooms in myself lol) is a great deal, you won’t find that anywhere else in the city where I live, not even on a discount hotel site!