Post # 1
UGH! I can’t believe I am one of those brides in this delima!
I have a friend that I was wavering on whether or not to invite and send a Save the Date to. Our Save-The-Date Cards are post cards. I filled one out for her and then set it aside. A week or so passed and I officially decided that I would NOT invite her to the wedding. The Save-The-Date Cards were shipped to VT so my mother could mail them out (we live in NJ and wanted the VT post mark since the wedding is in VT).
Apparently when I packed the Save-The-Date Cards to send to my mother, I accidentally put her STD in the mail. She received it. I want to bang my head against a wall over this.
What can I do???
Maid/Matron of Honor and I have come up with all sorts of resolutions from telling her that the budget has changed and we can’t accommodate everyone we thought we could to officially telling her I dont want her at our wedding because of a,b,c reasons. My biggest problem with actually being honest with her, is that she’s a major drama mama (big reason why we don’t want her there) and she’s tied to my life in both social and professional aspects. If I sit her down and tell her the truth, there will be high school hell to pay.
UGH UGH UGH!
what would you do???
Post # 3
you have to invite her now, unless you’re okay with never associating with her again, which is what will happen if you uninvite her. but if she has professional ties to you, that could be a very bad idea.
Post # 4
Knowing she is mega-drama, I’d just suck it up and keep her on. From what you’re saying it sounds like she might go bananas and make it worse for you if you were to dis-invite her.
Post # 5
Accidents happen- most of them have consequences. The consequence here is that you have to invite her.
Post # 6
Since she got the Save the Date, you now have to invite her.
I know it’s not what you want to do, but it would be completely rude to not invite her and would probably result in way more drama then it’s worth.
Just suck it up, invite her, and hope she declines.
Post # 7
Yeah, I agree with everyone–you gotta invite her. It’s too late.
Post # 8
shoulda coulda woulda, but you sent her the STD. unless she does something heinous between now and August I think you’ve gotta invite her.
Post # 9
invite her! there is no other way out of this
Post # 10
Invite her and move on. Given her drama queen status, I don’t think she’d take well to a well-meaning explanation of the mix-up. Sorry you are in this situation!!
Post # 11
I know i know i know. I was just hoping to hear creative answers.
Unless there’s a Phish conflict, she will not decline.
Post # 12
I gotta agree with other posters and say you must invite her now since you sent her a STD. Hopefully she declines!
Edit: well, hopefully she hangs out with her date the whole time and you barely have to see her!
Post # 13
I think you need to consider her side before you say anything. You just got invited to your friends wedding and suddenly she says oh yeah….your not invited.
I think you either deal with her there or stop being her “friend” it doesn’t really sound like you are her friend anyway.
Post # 14
It’s funny, I posted a thread a couple weeks ago about not wanting to invite someone I had sent a STD to, because she’s annoying and we haven’t spoken in like a year (because she’s annoying). A lot of people suggested I not send her an invite, and just wait to see if she says anything. But I couldn’t do it – she hadn’t done anything horrible, and I just felt too bad about essentially uninviting her. I think you’re in the same position, unfortunately.
If you want to lessen the chance of her coming, you could always invite her without a date (unless she’s married or engaged), but I think you’re pretty much stuck with her. Sorry.
Post # 15
Lol @ “Unless there’s a Phish conflict….” haha!
Post # 16
Sorry but I agree with PP’s. Invite her. In the end you wont notice her there anyway! You will be too busy being a newlywed!