(Closed) STDs: How Formal or Informal for addressing?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@BetterSherm:  I did exactly how you mentioned. Except the very few kids we’re inviting we didn’t include on the STD’s—we just addressed to their parents, but will include their names on the second line for the actual invitation. 

Post # 4
4676 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I adressed them the same way you did, but I also addressed my invites like that too.  For a save the date you are fine, especially if you are more casual people.  

Post # 5
1111 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

We’re having a pretty formal wedding, and I addressed our Save-The-Date Cards (also postcards) exactly as you described – except for the unmarried couples living together, I put Jane Smith & John Doe together on one line (instead of putting them on separate lines).

I plan on addressing our invites this same way, even though it’s considered more “casual” to do so.  Mr. and Mrs. John Doe just doesn’t feel natural to me, and Fiance & I wanted to address people the way we would talk to them in real life.  John & Jane Doe seems “friendlier” to me for some reason.  So especially for a more casual wedding, you’ll be fine!  Smile

Post # 6
581 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m doing casual for the STD (postcard,) and formal for the invites… I think I’ll address like this:

Smith Family (with kids)

Jane & John Smith

Jane Smith & John Johnson

Smith & Johnson Family (with kids)

Post # 7
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I just got a STD in the mail – no last names on it at all… From FI’s brother & his (apparently now) Fiance.  I’m not sure if they were unclear if we were already married, if they didn’t know my last name, if they were sending a lot of them and were afraid of hand cramps or what… but it was addressed to :

John + Jane

123 Main St

Houston, TX 77777

I was actually kind of suprised the mailman delivered it.  He seems to hate me – half my mail gets returned to sender for no apparent reason!

Post # 8
4485 posts
Honey bee

Regardless of the formality of the wedding itself (they are semi-formal by default), the save the dates are always informal.

It is common courtesy (and generally expected) to use first and last names for anything that is being mailed, whereas if something is hand-delivered, last names are not required, nor are addresses. But the post office will still deliver it since all they need is the full location of where to send it and they don’t care what the names are.

Post # 9
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

i think its as formal as you want it to be, i call my best friends parents mama and papa smith so thats exactly how i addressed their envelope and their rsvp 🙂 

Post # 10
1087 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I did my Save-The-Date Cards like this

Mr. & Mrs. John Doe

The Doe family

Mr. John Doe and Mrs. Jane Smith  (we put whoever we knew best first and their significant other second)

But I think that it is fine the way you did it.

I ended up printing labels for addresses (yes, i am aware this is not considered “proper etiquette”). But I did this for 2 reasons. #1 time- I wanted to get then out ASAP and #2 I have horrible handwriting and can’t afford a calligraher and I thought that the labels I picked looked very nice. Our wedding will be formal and so I figured it would be easier to just do them like this right now then have to retype all the labels for the invitations.

Post # 11
828 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

For a causal invitation, I think that you are correct.

Post # 12
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

That’s pretty much exactly how we did it too. We had a few families where we invited the parents and then their child that is the same age and friends with my sister so we did:

Mr. and Mrs. John Smith (or however you want to do a married couple)

Jane Smith (daughter)


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