Post # 1
So I just bought my used dress online (Casablanca 1827!!! Love at first sight). It’s a perfect fit, just needs hemming. I saved a boatload of money and did a happy dance over that. When I told my mom, she was happy for me, but also told me not to tell too many people (like posting it on Facebook) that I bought it used.
I wouldn’t have posted it on Facebook anyway, but what’s the deal with buying used wedding dresses? I didn’t see the point of spending that much money buying it new, when buying it used was perfectly fine and saved me money. I think that my mom just doesn’t want people to think they didn’t have enough money (they offered to buy me any price dress I wanted, within reason). But I’m having a small wedding anyway, and would rather put that money towards a downpayment.
But in general, is there a stigma against buying and wearing used dresses?
Post # 3
@squeak: I wouldn’t care if you bought your dress used or not! It’s none of my business and honestly, I would have commended you for saving money. I was interested in buying a used dress as well, but could not find one that I really liked in a close enough size. I didn’t want a fancy dress anyway, so it did not end up costing that much.
Post # 4
I almost got one myself, and would have if I could have found the one I wanted used.
This is really gross, but the only thing that remotely concerned me, after my mom brought it up, is the possibility that the last bride…..”consummated” in the dress. Apparently that’s a thing?! But if the dress is a sheath, or especially a mermaid, I really don’t think that could possibly be a concern!
Post # 5
@EffieTrinket: Ew, I didn’t even think of that. Thanks lol, now it’s in my head!
But my pre-owned wedding dress is a mermaid and was dry cleaned so hopefully I have nothing to worry about!
I actually brag about getting it preowned because I would feel silly if people thought I would actually spend $6,000 on a dress!
Post # 6
I got mine second hand also. Really, I can’t imagine spending double the money I paid for a dress that I will only be wearing for a few hours. And honestly, the “consumating”(?!) thing doesn’t bother me one bit because a) it has been dry cleaned, b) it’s not like anything would have happened to the actual dress during this process (lol) and c) what do you think happened on the sheets of the bed in the honeymoon suite? At least the dress has only been worn by one person lol…
But in all seriousness, I don’t care about any stigma, at least I saved a boatload of money that I can put to good use elsewhere! 😉
Post # 7
You know, this whole problem is really quite easily solved…with the proper word usage.
We buy used dogs – We call that Rescuing
We buy used cars – Those are called Pre-Owned Vehicles
We’ll put old barn siding back together as a coffee table and throw it in our living room – That’s called Repurposing.
So why not drop the “used” because it conjures images of some sweat-stained prom disaster in teal taffeta, and plug in Rescued…after all, if a wedding dress’s sole objective is to be worn while someone gets married, you really have saved it my dear, saved it from a life of longing and frustration….to shine once again on a dazzling bride for her special day….yes, I think the new term should be hencforce – Rescued –
Tell your mother that if she’s against rescuing that’s her problem, you are quite proud to have saved this garment and should feel no pressure to hide that.
Post # 8
@crystalrae: I am almost 100% sure you’re fine. I don’t think it would even be POSSIBLE to bone in a mermaid dress.I don’t see how people walk in them! Plus if it’s been cleaned, that makes all the difference in the world. At that point, like PP said, it’s really no different than hotel sheets.
Post # 9
@squeak: Take pride in your financial savvy. My friend who married a month after me spent $400 on her dress at a consignment store, and she looked smashing in it. When you look that good in a dress and saved tons of money, who can’t help but to compliment you?
Post # 10
I got mine from a consignment shop and I didn’t even blink an eye. I don’t know what the story is with the last bride who wore it, but it’s just a bit of fabric all sewn together for all I’m concerned. It wasn’t any different from something I’d pay 10x the money on for a brand new dress, except I’ll have to get it dry cleaned to make sure it looks like it’s in tip-top shape. Plus, it’s probably been worn for what, a day at most? That’s pretty gently used, in my opinion.
I’m not ashamed of it. I got a beautiful dress I love for $200, and the rest of the money I allotted for a dress can now go towards making spectacular decorations or towards the honeymoon.
Post # 11
@squeak: Not sure if it’s just a stigma against used wedding dresses… I think it’s anything used in general (except now it’s cool to buy ‘vintage’ aka used clothes).
I don’t think you did anything wrong. A wedding dress is a pretty frivolous item if you think about it. I think you’re pretty smart.
I’ve never worn anything used, and the concept kinda icks me out, but it’s not like I’ve given it a lot of thought. I am sure it’s clean and perfectly fine… and it’s not like a wedding dress could have been worn more than once previously lol.
You did good. But yeah… I wouldn’t broadcast it if your mom is worried it’ll make them look cheap.
Post # 12
I HATE this. I would love to own a pre-owned wedding dress shop. If you buy a dress off the rack in a shop, chances are it will have been worn for longer by the hundreds of brides trying it on, than a bride wearing her dress for 1 day. I love the fact that someone could wear my wedding dress (especailly if they loved it and couldn’t afford it). I wish more people would come around to this thinking, but I also think it doesn’t help that there isn’t any shops that sell them. The only places I see them are EBAY and charity shops (and the latter are always from the 80s or something!). If you have tried one on in a shop then see it on EBAY then great!! But its hard to buy a dress without trying it on. I think if you see it more people would be accepting. The prices are ridiculous and why wouldn’t you wear a dress that someone has worn ONCE and just for a few hours. It’s crazy
Post # 13
- Wedding: November 2012 - Oak Tree Manor
@Nona99: YES, THIS! I am all for buying used dresses. It’s such a shame that there are so many dresses out there that only get worn once. My mom kept hers for her daughter (me I guess?) to wear, but when she took it out of the garment bag some 10-15 years later, it was moldy. Yuck. I will probably resell mine, partly because I would love for some other bride to wear it 🙂
Post # 14
@Nona99: Love this idea. Going to refer to a ‘rescued’ dress in future haha
Post # 16
@Sheepshead: That’s awesome! I don’t know if I could have “rented” a designer dress though, I imagine it probably has to fit you perfectly with no alterations?
I bought my dress new, but only because I couldn’t find it used. I only wore it for pics, the ceremony, and the reception, then changed into my after-party dress, then changed into lingerie for the “consummation” (hehe). I had it cleaned and sold it to a bride who saw the pics I posted on the Bee! So I didn’t put it up for sale or anything, but was glad I sold it. So happy my beautiful dress got to be enjoyed by more than one bride.