Post # 76
You sound really defensive and insecure. You’re also being just as rude and judgmental about your friends’ lifestyle. Here’s a thought: instead of adding to the drama by trashing Lori’s home and town, maybe you should just be honest and sincere and tell your friends that their jokes hurt your feelings and ask them to stop.
Or don’t bother, because you don’t seem to even like these people. So why are you friends with them? Sounds like you enjoy the cycle of drama and judgment just as much.
Post # 77
In my area, “trailer” is generally the word used to refer to a mobile home and not to an RV. I don’t know why, but the people who live in mobile homes also call them trailers. I don’t think someone saying “trailer” around here would be meant to be offensive. That being said, if you prefer your home to be called a mobile home, and you have stated that preference to your friend, she should refer to it as a mobile home. That is what friends do. Your friend should be helping you transform your new place from its original condition into your dream home, not giving you a hard time about it. Maybe there is some level of jealousy or at least frustration that she is not able to purchase her own home yet? Just trying to rationalize why she might be acting like this.
Post # 78
There is absolutely nothing wrong with living in a mobile home. Your friends are ignorant for making those comments.
Post # 79
Your ‘trailer’ is bigger than my house (950 sq ft) and sounds like it’s going to be lovely when you’re finished putting your own touches on it. My Future Sister-In-Law and her hubby bought a mobile home for their first house, because they wanted to stop renting and build equity and it was what they could afford at the time. My mom still lives in one.
Your friends sound like assholes.
Post # 80
I’m sorrry that I didn’t read all of the comments, so you may have received this advice already…..but it sounds like me that when Lori makes some nasty comment, that you engage in further conversation about it. I can totally understand that, since you are informing her that ‘there isn’t a shitty drywall job underneath’ but you really don’t need to do that. Just shut that conversation down! Don’t engage in it. Should she say nasty things about your home? NO! But you don’t need to defend it to her or to anyone!
So the next time she says something about how she wouldn’t live there just respond with, ‘well, it’s a good thing that you don’t, but we are very happy- thanks.’ I also wouldn’t show her pictures or initiate a discussion on what you are doing. if she texts/calls you to see what you are doing just say you are busy working on the house and that you can’t talk bc you have work to do.
Another strategy that I might use if she says something nasty is to just look at her genuinely and say, ‘ what was your purpose in saying something like that? that wasn’t helpful and it wasn’t kind, either.’
I really care very little about how other people live or what they have/own. I’m happy with my choices in life. Maybe you should be too.
Post # 81
She sounds like an asshole who says that stuff because she enjoys feeling superior and knows she can get away with it. But I don’t think you’re handling this well.
If I were you I would either phase her out or tell her outright that she’s being hurtful. Right now you are playing the game with her and that won’t end well for you. Don’t defend yourself by arguing about the drywall and trying to gain her approval– that’s just fuel for her fire. And you are wasting your time “retaliating” with your own passive-aggressive comments to her (about her city, etc.). When you say stuff like that you’re only making it obvious that she’s getting to you and also allowing her to justify her own nasty comments.
Be direct with her or dump her. If you tell her that she’s being hurtful and the friendship is worth it to her, she will figure out how to hold her tongue.
Post # 82
get new friends. They’re being jerky for no good reason.
Post # 83
it sounds like you made a good investment kudos. It also seems like Lori is a bit insecure, give her time to settle down and see if it passes. Also if you’re really good friends you could tell her these comments seem rude.
Post # 85
What’s up with all the necrobumping this morning?