Stigma on used clothes

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 31
Member
1180 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2021 - City, State

Thrift (or charity shops) in the U.K. Are silly expensive, sometimes even more so than buying new clothes 🙁

Post # 32
Member
619 posts
Busy bee

We are pregnant with #1 and will be buying second hand on most things, except anything safety related. We both have good jobs and can afford to purchase new, but we love thrifting and knowing we can stretch our budget. Shopping second hand is also better for the environment, keeps the money in the community, helps fund local nonprofits, and helps people gain valuable job skills- which are all very important to our family. 

Post # 33
Member
390 posts
Helper bee

As someone who has a *slight* shopping addiction but not the means to justify it thrift stores are my best friend! Let me tell you people who don’t go to thrift stores are sorely missing out. As long as your are picking a “nice side of town” or consignment store and picking clothes without pills, stains, etc. you should absolutely not feel weird about it.

I go to the “ritzy” part of town goodwill and have found SO many cute cardigans, including cashmere, brand new chuck taylors, trendy leather jackets, etc. and have saved myself hundreds.

Also, some goodwills take “old” things from stores and sell them even though they are brand new. Example: A target near a goodwill near me gives all of their “damaged” boxes, clothes, etc. to goodwill who sells them brand new with tags on at a discount. Your hubby cannot disagree with that.

I would say go ahead and buy from the thrift store because to be honest how often will your husband be shopping with you AND most mothers bring home and wash all the “new” clothes anyways so how is he going to know if it was used or brand new? 

Post # 34
Member
4233 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

When I was a kid my Mom had that hangup too. She’d rather buy us no-name cheap looking new clothes instead of nicer, higher quality clothes that happened to be second hand. She wouldn’t even let us wear hand-me-downs from other relatives….we still got made fun of because while people can’t tell if your clothes are new or second hand, they CAN tell what brand your clothes are!

My standpoint is I’ll probably buy a mix of new AND used….and wash them VERY well before they wear them.

Post # 35
Member
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’ve found people with that mentality usually came from poorer families.  Because they had limited incomes they associated their being made fun of by having to use “old clothes” which is why some would it their kids new clothes so they don’t get stigmatized or show how well off they are.  I would try to narrow down the root cause and you might see it stems from something like that.  Once you know what is causing the violent reaction then you can deal with the real issue.  Also he might change his mind when all his friends tell him about the deals they get with used kids clothing.  We are far from rich but we have friends who are all higher middle class and sometimes quite well off and every single parent we know buys some used clothing.

Post # 36
Member
222 posts
Helper bee

I don’t mind getting furniture/clocks/antiques/many things for the home second hand but can’t bring myself to buy second hand clothes. Anything fabric creeps me out because of bed bugs, lice etc. And as pp said, the idea of previously poohed in baby clothes makes me shudder, but i don’t care if other people buy them.

Post # 37
Member
236 posts
Helper bee

waitingtobeemrs14 :  just the way you cannot imagine it being a big deal that you wore used clothes is the same exact way that he cannot imagine wearing it. I would just give it up. If he wants to buy the kids new clothes then ok. If you want to buy the kids used clothes- then ok. 

Post # 38
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee

waitingtobeemrs14 :  Interesting.. not gonna lie my husband would have NEVER bought clothes from a thrift store until he actually shopped in them and realized the decent stuff they have! And he didn’t grow up spoiled either, it might just be a certain aversion people have. 

Now the only clothes I really buy are from thrift stores or from a “real” store only if there’s a sale or clearance lol. My husband also likes thrift stores too. 

Btw you can often find brand new clothes there. Just bought a $60 down vest with the price tags still on it for $4 😊

Post # 39
Member
2442 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

If you aren’t rich, but have to take a toddler, baby or pretween to a fancy event, it makes sense to buy used. You know those fancy outfits didn’t get worn more than once, maybe even never!

For everyday play clothes, they are cheap enough new, but if you found used ones that look good, why not?

Post # 40
Member
47204 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

He can keep his attitude. You can shop for the children’s clothes wherever you choose. I’m betting that the task is going to fall on you anyhow.

Post # 41
Member
253 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I guess I’m in the minority’s here too. I’m coming up on 30 weeks and I have zero plans to buy anything used for our child. Id never even been in a thrift store until I met my husband, and no I didn’t “come from a poorer family.” Now I go now every once in a while for furniture (we got a tv stand from goodwill around here) but I’m not into 2nd hand clothes unless they come from family/friends. I don’t think it’s a big deal, more of a personal preference. I really don’t care where anyone gets their stuff from. 

Post # 42
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

How snobby. Not only do I buy my kids clothes that are used (always!) but I buy all my clothes second hand as well! I shop eBay and even goodwill for nicer name brands. They often still have the tags still on them or look brand new. I just got a nice $100 new with tags banana republic sweater at goodwill the other day for $6

Post # 43
Member
1078 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

bubblyx :  I am not attacking you so please don’t read it that way but I am genuinely curious about why you will only take used clothes from people you know vs people you don’t know? I can’t think of any reason that’s why I’m asking.

Post # 44
Member
3114 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Surfer\'s Beach, Grand Cayman

The city that we has tons of bed bug infestations and the second hand shops are notoriously overpriced, like sometimes more expensive than new, so we don’t shop second hand. 

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