(Closed) Still Friends with Bride?

posted 11 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
60 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man for my good friend’s wedding but immediately after her honeymoon, things changed.  No longer was I the good friend who was always there for her but now, she’s MARRIED and I’m not so according to her, I can’t understand any issues she is facing.  We’re still friends but to a much lesser extent and it makes me sad.

Post # 18
796 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

I’m pretty sure my Maid/Matron of Honor and I won’t talk after the wedding. I’m surprised I’m admitting this because sometimes it makes me feel like a bad person! She and I got in a big fight early in my engagement – she was lying to me, seemed like she wasn’t interested in not only my wedding but in me as her friend, and it seemed like we didn’t have a real friendship. Nothing really changed, but we made up and she has kind of thrown herself into best-MOH-ever! mode. It seems really fake to me, but I was selfish and decided it would be easier to just let it go than "kick her out" and deal with the fall out from her and our mutual friends (almost all of my friends are also her friends, I’ve just known her the longest). Once this is over, my motivation to stay friendly will be gone.

Post # 19
7430 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Wow, you ladies have me worried now!  All my maids are my best friends, and i can’t imagine my life without them, which is why their in my wedding. They’ve all told me that I’m so laid back with the whole wedding planning process, which is how I want my whole wedding to be.  I"m hoping to get into yoga here soon, and not turn into a bridezilla at any point.  I’m hoping that my whole wedding will bring us closer together, and years down the road when the others get married (one’s married, the other 3 are single) I hope to be bridesmaids in their weddings.  My sister tells me I’ll be here Maid/Matron of Honor, she would have been mine but we decided not to do that, since my Fiance couldn’t pick a best man.  She’s going to be standing right next to me anyway, cuz in all sense of the word she is to me anyway. I hope you and your maids all remain tight after the wedding!

Post # 20
62 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I had a similar situation to Jessie516, I was one of the MOHs in a college friend’s wedding.  We were very close friends at the time of her wedding and I was very honored to be in her wedding.  We are planning on inviting them to our wedding, but we aren’t super close anymore at all.  My fiance and I even went to visit them (they live in a another state) for a summer vacation last year.  After that, we hardly spoke at all.  I would call and she basically returned my messages via Facebook.  We went from practically best friends to acquaintences via Facebook for, in my opinion, no reason at all! 

Post # 21
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

Im going through a situation also with a very good friend of mine ( I would consider her a best friend) . I have been friends with her since childhood. We grew apart in high school and about 4 years ago became good friends again. She got engaged almost 2 years ago and I have been helping her with as much as I can. I have sent her idea after idea. Help her with finding a venue. Call places to find her dress etc… Even though I was giving her ideas and helping her (which she wanted ) she wasn’t as motivated in doing anything for her wedding since she was having a long engagement to to money issues. She knew I was soon to be engaged so it wasn’t a surprise but as soon as that ring was on my finger she has become a bridezilla… All of a sudden she is very demanding and needs me to ‘help’ her with everyhing and now she is saying that I have  ‘changed’ since i am engaged. My engagement is 9 months long and I feel like I don’t have much time. I was going to ask her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor but she has changed so much. We have been in a big arguement over this and she thinks it is my fault. I guess I just felt like when I went to visit her a few months back that we had NOTHING in common anymore. I have slightly suggested we not be in eachothers weddings but I don’t think she got the point.  Im sure I could be handling this differently but I am too stressed about my wedding to deal with this. She has changed, we have nothing in common and I just don’t agree with the way she is directing her life towards and don’t see the point in ‘pretending’ to be friends just so we can be in eachothers weddings. I am very upset about this but don’t know really how to handle it.

Post # 22
1813 posts
Buzzing bee

I still talk to all of them, but it is VERY infrequent with most, and I’ve only been Maid/Matron of Honor for my sister, so of course we still talk.  😉  Of course, most of my friends aren’t phone chatty, and we mostly live in other states…

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