(Closed) Stings From A Distance (vent)

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
8439 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I am so sorry that your friend (if you can call her that) is being very unfriend like. What she did was extremely hurtful and in my opinion not somethng that a friend would do. A real friend is there for you regardless of where you live and understands that sometimes life gets in the way of wants!

You can still be there for your friends even if you live a million miles away. You can send a care package (of baby clothes, of pictures of you and your friend from growing up/college whatever), you can skype/email/call etc. Long distance friendship can be done you just have to put the effort in. One of my oldest and closest friends lives in an entirely different country to me but we are still as close as we were when we went to high school together.

Don’t give up on your other friend just because this girl is rude and calluous.

Post # 4
Member
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

eek, that sounds terrible. I’m sorry. If I were you, I’d write her an e-mail or something to let her know how it hurt you. Make sure you’re calm before you send it out. Sometimes in phone calls its hard to get everything you would like to say out there. 

I don’t think that’s necessarily a friendship ender (unless she’s choosing it to be), but she does need to apologize at least. That sort of behavior is not what anyone needs in a friend. 

Post # 6
Member
339 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Well, if she’s going to be that way, there’s not a lot you can do. I guess sometimes you figure out who your real friends are, and it’s unfortunate that she can’t see things from your perspective. Maybe she doesn’t deserve you as her friend. It’s totally unfair of her to block your e-mail. She got to say what she wanted, but now you can’t ask her or explain anything? Boo to that. 

big hugs

Post # 7
Member
2577 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Hugs.

 

 I am sorry, but that was a downright bitchy thing for your friend to do. She owes you an apology.

Post # 8
Member
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Im so sorry your friend is treating you like that. That is not the most mature way to go about it on her part. You shouldn’t feel guilty, she is choosing to push you away as a friend and she doesn’t deserve you.

Post # 9
Member
1239 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

sShe replied “from the heart, hope you’re happy” and then blocked you?? wow, that is so harsh and unreasonable. Sorry you are going through that.

Post # 10
Member
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I know that I would’ve been hurt if my best friend couldn’t make it to my wedding, however, I would also understand that sometimes life gets in the way and even though we try our hardest, sometimes it’s just not enough. That was a really shitty thing for your friend to do, especially after you already told her you couldn’t make it and she was fine with it. I’m sorry that you have to go through this, but like you said earlier, you need to focus on what is right for you right now.

Post # 11
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

Wow, that’s harsh… Maybe you are better off without her.

Post # 12
Member
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

That was nasty! Hope you’re ok. Sending hugs X

Post # 13
Member
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

Wow, you would have thought she was happy to be married?  But instead she’s more concerned with who was in her bridal party.  That photo was like a big slap in the face and it would take me a long time to get over it.

I can’t really help with the being away from your friends when they have a lot of life-changing events.  I’m a former military brat so I’m used to leaving and missing out on stuff.  DH lived in the same place for 30 years and still has his childhood friends.  Went to all their weddings, etc. but once he left (a few months before they all got pregnant) they give him a hard time for leaving….like it was a friendship ending move.  I just don’t understand it. 

Post # 14
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@texasbee:  My father was a diplomat, so my childhood was like yours, constantly on the move, constantly leaving friends behind.  My Fiance is like yours, lived in the same place for all his life. He posted recently on FB that he was moving 200 miles north to be with me…and his relatives acted like he was moving to the far side of the moon!  It really pissed me off…

OP, if she’s going to act like that on what is supposed to be one of the happiest times of her life, you are better off not having her as a friend.  She sounds very immature, if she can’t realise that sometimes other life events take precedence!

Post # 15
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

So sorry that happened to you! How hurtful. Please do not take it to heart, as hard as that may be. She was obviously feeling hurt & resentful and maybe suffering through a bit of post-wedding void? HURT people sometimes want to HURT others as sad as that is.

But that was really  snarky, it’s one thing to say something in the heat of the moment or send of an angry emal but to manually write it out and send it in the mail, that definetely shows intent. And then blocking you, wow. Maybe her wedding was not as special sa she expected and she wrongly blames you? WHATEVER THE REASON, YOU DONT DESERVE A FRIEND LIKE THAT!

You seem to ba a caring girl, smart & doing what needs to be done to improve your life, and ensure your safety sheesh!

Even though you are moving eventually, go out and meet some of those hippy California girls, they would probably make great friends, lol

Even though childhood friends are special, so are new friends…good luck!

Post # 16
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@LadyInGreen:  Wow. What she did was horrible. You missed her wedding for a good reason: you had no time left to get off work because you had to use your vacation time to attend to deaths in the family. If she is too unsympathic to understand that, she does not need a place in your life.

I’m snarky enough to make a new email address and tell her this and wish her adeu because you will have a better life without her.Embarassed

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