(Closed) Stop faking it = start having it?

posted 7 years ago in Intimacy
  • poll: Have you ever faked it?
    yes, I fake it most of the time : (29 votes)
    14 %
    yes, but only a few times : (82 votes)
    39 %
    no, I have never faked it! : (84 votes)
    40 %
    I haven't, but I've consdiered it : (8 votes)
    4 %
    I always fake it : (6 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    13099 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I’ve never faked it and lucky for me, I don’t have to.  Darling Husband seems to understand that it isn’t going to happen 100% of the time (and he can tell I’m still enjoying it even if I don’t actually orgasm).  Lucky for me – more times than not I do orgasm though! πŸ™‚

    Post # 4
    Member
    2703 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    i’ve faked it a hand full of times… usually i don’t have to fake it at all, Darling Husband is def aware that it’s a different process for women and sometime it’s just not going to happen for me… luckily it’s a rarity for me not to O πŸ˜›

    HOWEVER, the 2 months preceding up to the wedding were so crazy that i couldn’t get off… I THOUGHT I HAD LOST MY O FOREVER!!!! it came back on our wedding night! πŸ™‚

    Post # 5
    Member
    1872 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: February 2011

    From the article (to be fair, the article is not advocating this, just stating why so many women fake): “[women claim] that faking is a necessary byproduct of the male ego and protecting a guy’s self-esteem.”

    I’m not a faker. I’m sorry, but the male ego just doesn’t mean that much to me.

     

    Post # 6
    Member
    1537 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    I’ve never faked it…I’m not going to make my man think he’s doing it right when he’s not because that would result in me never getting there. Plus, he would totally know! Sometimes I think he’s more in tune with my body than I am…very stange lol, but a good thing!

    Post # 7
    Member
    2867 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I always say “Why would I fake it? That’s only going to hurt me!” Seriously why encourage someone to keep doing something that doesn’t work by pretending like they’re doing a good job, rather than making them figure out what works? πŸ™‚

    Post # 9
    Member
    7779 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper

    Nope, never. I was one of those women that didnt start having them until my 20s and in the beginning of our relationship it used to really hurt DHs feelings. It made him feel inadequate. After I explained that some women are just wired that way, he understood.

    I have them now. πŸ™‚

    Post # 10
    Member
    7587 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I have faked it with everyone but Fiance.  Hence why I am marrying him LOL

    Post # 11
    Member
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    I faked it almost every time with an ex boyfriend (he was my first, I was inexperienced and I thought it was the right thing to do). It was a mistake because then he never actually made an attempt to please me (since he thought I was pleased), and when he found out I was faking he was very upset. It’s definitely better to be honest.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1810 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: April 2011

    @DeathByDesign: Sorry if this is a weird question, but how did he find out?

     

    Anyway, I have faked it in the past, but never with my FH.

    Post # 13
    Member
    7771 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I would never fake it.  He would know if I did.  He shouldn’t think I am enjoying it if I am not :/

    Post # 14
    Member
    5657 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2012

    @JenniMichele: I eventually told him because I felt guilty and I was also unsatisfied.

    Post # 15
    Member
    1296 posts
    Bumble bee

    I haven’t faked it I just can’t.  If it’s not working then I tell my SO that.  Although thankfully I’ve never had that problem.  I’m sorry if your ego takes a hit just get over it.  My friend who had been with her ex for six years faked it all the time.  In fact she never had an orgasm the whole time they were together.  I mean that’s crazy I would of said something a long time ago.

    Post # 16
    Member
    2523 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    I’ve never faked it, but lucky for me I don’t have to. I’m naturally multiorgasmic. I have about 3-5 orgasms when I have sex, without clitoral stimulation. I wouldn’t fake it anyway, because I feel it’s not honest. If you’re not having one, talk to your FH or Boyfriend or Best Friend about it. Communitcation is very important in relationships, and sex.

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