- 5 years ago
- Wedding: August 2013
Some of you may recall my previous stories of ridiculous RSVPs and with less than two weeks until my wedding, it’s still happening!
My fiance’s brother and sister-in-law have an 18 year old nephew. The three of them were invited to the wedding. The invite was addressed to “John, Jane, and Billy Smith”. The RSVP came back saying “John, Jane, and Billy Smith will be attending”. Pretty cut and dry. Or so I thought.
In a round about way the sister-in-law mentions that the newphew’s girlfriend is coming to the wedding. Not “oh hey, would it be okay if…” but rather “oh, she’s coming with us”.
There are several reasons the newphew didn’t get a plus 1. Largly because at the time that invites went out, neither my fiance nor I were aware that there WAS a girlfriend. Additionally, we have given plus ones to a LOT of guests because there are a lot of married couples and out of town guests that should have a travel companion. Not knowing that the newphew had a girlfriend, there didn’t seem to be a reason for him to be able to bring a guest when we were tying to keep the guest list down. This is especially true because a LOT of his family is already going to be at the wedding, including another nephew his own age that he gets a long great with, and also family friends.
Whatever our reasons were, it was our choice to not give him a plus one, and we were entitled to make that decision. It pisses me off that they just went ahead and invited her to the wedding AFTER sending us back an RSVP without including her. So how were we supposed to include her in my head count? Which, by the way, was already sent in to my venue. Also, did they ever once stop to think about the fact that this is now an additional expense for US to have someone at our wedding that we didn’t invite in the first place??
At the end of the day, I told my fiance that I didn’t want to cause any kind of issue between family so let’s just accept that she’s coming and adjust as necessary. My question is this:
My fiance doesn’t think I need to inform the venue of just ONE additional guest. But, I think I should. Though neither of us really see the HUGE impact of one person (especially since -luckily in this situation- we have open seating. So what do you all think? Do I need to inform my venue? I say yes, my fiance says no. What do the bees say??