- 4 years ago
- Wedding: August 2015
When I’m out of town visiting & busy with family and friends, I tend to keep other communication to a minimum, I didn’t visit weddingbee the entire holiday and was slow to reply to texts. I also did notice texting issues New Year’s Eve/ Day with ones I did try to send/ receive.
But you also don’t want to do too much at this point Bee, I wouldn’t send more texts either. From his perspective, even if I liked someone and was interested in getting to know them better, too much too soon would tend to scare me off.
But he still went out with you, either out of politeness or because he was interested in getting to know you better. But to be honest, I think your actions made things a bit much.
If I were you I would have gotten my car out of his driveway much sooner (if he’s home, then not home etc then road conditions are obviously good enough for some people to leave his street). I would have gone back with shovels etc, whatever was necessary to have my car either driven or towed out of a good Samaritan’s driveway. And I wouldn’t text someone I barely knew at 11pm nor ask to impose on his roommate. To be honest, I think he may be torn at this point. He sounds like a nice decent guy whose instinct is to help people, but you’ve made it all a bit much more of a hassle than he bargained for. So my advice is to back off and see if he makes the next move- if he does, he’s interested, if he doesn’t, either he was only being polite or he had second thoughts about things. I’d hardly call it ‘ghosting’ you when you only went out once.
And of course I’m going to back off, and yes maybe ghosting is not the right word. Also, if I was such a huge hassle to him or if he was going out with me out of politeness why would he suggest “we go out and celebrate getting my car back?” When I replied that I could just stop by and drop off the gift he said “I definitely want to meet up with you!”
I was rooting for this love story OP! Sad to see it didn’t turn out the way you wanted. I guess one of the positives you can take from the experience is that there are still kind and helpful people in the world!
So many things don’t add up:
How is Mr. Good Samaritan travelling from home to elsewhere on multiple occasions if the only access to his street is a trecherous hill even people in the business of dealing with treacherous road conditions dare not travel?
Or, if there is an alternate route, why couldn’t your car be dug out/ towed out/ whatever via the alternate route?
It doesn’t make sense he ‘left the key out for you’, that’s either made up or bizarre. Because who in his right mind leaves a key out for a veritable stranger, even if he thinks she may be nice? Not to mention he’s also jeopardizing this Alleged Yet Never Seen Roommate’s well being & personal property, leaving strangers access to house keys without his knowledge. Plus- you only found out about the key because you still couldn’t get your car. Had you and your gf both been able to drive away, you would never have used the key nor known of its existence- and Good Samaritan couldn’t have guessed in advance you’d need to get in at eleven o’clock at night to pee. And ‘hoping we’d have a chance to interact again’ is a truly bizarre reason to leave a near stranger a key to access his home. You both have cell phones to keep in contact- and if he wants to ‘interact again’ with you, he could do something more normal/ less risky, like ask you out.
You may have started this out as a charming little holiday rom-com, but it’s turned far fetched and rather odd.
Is your car out of his driveway yet?
I disagree that most guys who are interested text back and forth in the very beginning of a relationship. In my experience the opposite is true.
I know you don’t think you came on too strong, but
By The Way. wasn’t he a little vague about his plans that first weekend, three weeks ago? You had a sense he might have an out of town Girlfriend. Not that he owed a stranger the details of his itinerary. More to the point, didn’t he fail to reply to one of your texts back then, too?
I wouldn’t write him off, but I wouldn’t pursue him further either…ball is in his court. In the meantime, go date, meet new people and if you hear from him and can get together, great.
I never understand why people can’t at least send a text, but you never know I suppose.
Just wait and see what happens in the next week or two.
Any updates to this? I’m hoping for good news!
I hope the Bees haven’t scared you off – any updates?
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