(Closed) Stressed bride to be because of bridesmaid issue!! help…

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@Sunnyone:I think she *should* understand because that is the exact same thing she told you about the bridesmaids in her own wedding. It’s pretty presumptious to think that she’s in the wedding party nevermind the MOH!

Were you always planning on having your Goddaughters as BM? Or did she assume that as well?

Post # 5
693 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

That’s not cool at all. It is YOUR day, not hers. You definitely should have been the one to tell them. 

The dress is a personal moment especially if you want it to be a surprise. Did you go dress shopping with her?

You said that you guys have been drifting, maybe she is being so pushy because that is her way of getting back into your life on a more constant basis?


Post # 6
98 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2013


Ridiculous. It’s hard not to feel guilty about this but its your wedding. If your wedding party consist of close family then there’s your out. Explain this to her something along the lines of

“xxxx we’ve been friends for xxxx and I value your friendship and am happy you can share in my day as a guest. We have decided to have close family as apart of my bridal party and really want to keep all the special details between my groom and I …….. yaddy yaddy ya.”

If she is a real friend she will understand this and as she was previously a bride herself she should know better. Good Luck

Post # 7
2152 posts
Buzzing bee

I think that your friend should understand.  She did the exact same thing a few years ago, you may need to remind her of that.

On the fip side though, (and not knowing your relationship with her at all) it sounds a little odd to say family only and then include someone who isn’t family, brothers girlfriend.   Unless she is a close friend of yours outside of the relationship she isn’t really family and she and your brother could break up one day. 

But ultimately you can have whomever you want in your party.  I would also mention to her about her telling her children before you had mentioned it, as it could have put you in a very awkward position.

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