(Closed) Stripe instead of Honeyfund or similar site, rude? Untrustworthy?

posted 3 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 2
Member
13838 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I’d prefer Honeyfund because I’ve actually heard of it, but personally,  I find blatantly asking for money to be rude regardless of which service is used.

Post # 3
Member
1206 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

+1 on preferring Honeyfund because I’ve actually heard of it.  But I don’t like honeymoon funds and wouldn’t contribute to it anyway.  I always give cash at a wedding so I don’t see the need for anything that takes even a small percentage of that.

Post # 4
Member
3176 posts
Sugar bee

Still rude. Not more or less rude, just rude. If you had a small registry, I would get the picture and give you a check. 

Post # 5
Member
5816 posts
Bee Keeper

amm6257 :  I wouldn’t trust a website I hadn’t heard of with my credit card or debit card  information or my personal info. If you and your Fiance already live together and don’t have a registry, I’d sooner put cash or a cheque in a card than gift you something on a site I’m unfamilar with. 

Post # 6
Member
200 posts
Helper bee

I’d stick with Honeyfund or not do the honeymoon registry.  It would make me nervous to input my CC on a website I wasn’t familiar with.

I also don’t get the “Honeyfund is so rude. You’re asking for money.”  Okay…then don’t have a registry.  That’s asking for gifts. *rolls eyes*

Post # 7
Member
8615 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

amm6257 :  I wouldn’t use any site – cash registries make my eye twitch. If there is no registry I always give a check. If I ever encountered a registry that was only for money I’d probably mail you a toaster (just kidding, I’d want to do that, but in reality I’d likely just skip the wedding). 

Post # 8
Member
5025 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

I think honeyfunds are smart.  The tradition of moving directly from your parents home in with a spouse is becoming less common.  Many people live on their own and build an inventory of belongings for years prior to marriage. I for one do not need more stuff.  However who couldn’t benefit from a fund?

Post # 9
Member
906 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Just don’t register, or register for a few things for those people (usually older relatives) who insist on giving a boxed gift. People will get the hint.

I’d rather give someone money directly instead of having a company with a cutesy name a cut of the dough. 

Post # 10
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2018 - Omaha, NE

I find honeyfunds to be somewhat rude. Gift registries are technically asking for gifts, yes, BUT gifts are traditionally given at weddings, so really gift registries are just specifying the items you want, if they were going to get you a gift. There will always be people who go off the registry and give random gifts anyway. If you don’t want gifts, and do want money, just don’t register. People will get the hint. Anyone who doesn’t will include a gift receipt if they’re smart. 

Like others said, with a website honeyfund, some of the money goes to the website, which seems rather wasteful to me.

Post # 13
Member
8615 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

amm6257 :  Declining an invitation is never rude – if they told you the reason then THAT would be rude. I’ve been invited to events that I thought were tacky for one reason or another and so I just send my regrets, no need to tell them that I found some aspect of their plans distasteful. 

Post # 14
Member
864 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

amm6257 :  No one needs to be told to give you a gift or how to give it.  People are quite aware that gifts are commonly given to the couple getting married, and capable of choosing something themselves.

Post # 15
Member
2506 posts
Sugar bee

amm6257 :  so directly asking for money is tacky. that said, i alwasy give money anyway and i’d be fine with Stripe/Venmo/PayPaling it to you. I refuse to use Honeyfund because I don’t want to pay a service – I want the entirety of my gift to go to the couple. So I’d prefer Stripe over Honeyfund. That said, I’d likely just put a check in a card at the end of the day.

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