Aaaand that’s why most of my friends are guys.
Men don’t sugar coat bullsh*t and give it back to you in a pretty package. They tell it like they see it and I’m sorry, but you asked for it, joke or not.
Noone wants to know what their limitations are but we all have them. Some of these are soft limits, meaning they could be expanded upon with work, and some are hard, meaning you could try till you’re blue in the face and it will always be a limit.
It sounds to me like your husband gave you an earful. In retrospect, probably not as brutal as you think and maybe, you can agree with some of his points. Right now, your emotions are too raw to do an analytical dissection but sleep on them and approach them tomorrow with fresh perspective. I’m sure, unless he’s a complete ass, that he was not trying to personally attack you but offer you his perspective on the question you posed.
That being said, Guys are not known for sensitivity. They are problem solvers by nature. Whereas a woman will get emotional and try to rationalize and guy just wants to fix the problem.
I’m sorry he was hard on you. Tough love or the ‘suck it up, Buttercup’ is the way they’re programmed. Girls are coddled from childhood, boys are told they better not cry no matter what. It makes you stronger *insert chest beating*.
I’d talk to him tomorrow, or the next time you’re calm and just flat out say “Look, I know I asked you xyz the other night and I appreciate your response however, next time it would really help me if you approached a discussion like that with a little more sensitivity”. By making it seem like he’s helping (read: fixing) by shedding a little bit of the tough guy attitude when dealing with you, he’s more likely to approach the topic with a hint more discretion.
Take some deep breaths, realise that you are loved, and all the best