(Closed) Struggling with weight….. And how my DH is dealing with it. Help!

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
235 posts
Helper bee


oh, OP, I’m so sorry. :'( I’ve been with my husband his entire military career including ROTC and I basically told him if he wanted to go special ops he could do it alone and I would wait for him when he was done… Because I couldn’t handle it and I would end up in the hospital too. 

You are so strong and you are not a burden but a beautiful reason to come home! Please get all the help you need… Can he transition out of the special forces? Has he been special ops your entire marriage and/or before? 

You are so strong and need to stay strong for your babies. The biggest of hugs to you. Feel free to message me anytime you feel alone… <3 

If he deploys so much I suppose you all are oconus? That would be extra hard. 

I hold you in the highest respect… <3 my heart is beating so fast just thinking about it all… My stomach is sick too. Please don’t be shy to admit you are struggling and can’t handle it at certain moments… It’s a strong person who reaches out for help in times of need. 



Post # 34
235 posts
Helper bee


Oh, that all makes more sense! I didn’t know he was career military though that makes sense since he is high ranking… (I’m not the most military savvy, ha) You are an amazing woman and I tip my that to you and your family! Sounds like a wonderful plan after he is done with actice duty. 

I will keep your family in my thoughts and prayers! So sad to hear about both of you having ptsd. Thank you for being strong. 

He sounds like a gem and you sound like such a sweetheart and I really hope his deployments slow down and that you find the right help! <3 

My husband will be going to Ft. Gordon in a few years when he goes to school for Signal Corp. maybe your Darling Husband will be one of his instructors! 😀 

I have always dreamed of going to England! I hope you like the good old USofA! At least your close to the ocean… Currently we are in the desert! XD 

That’s very cool. My Darling Husband always teases me on the weekends he’s going to go special ops just so he can have a long beard… 😉 

Best. <3 


Post # 35
61 posts
Worker bee

Also, I’d suggest steering clear of some anorexia websites. Some are great, but many are not. I was enabled like crazy back in high school on a website pretty much giving me advice on how to be more anorexic. The only thing that would get me was when someone I’d talk to would disappear for months and when they came back they’d been in the hospital. Now whenever I want to slip back into old habits, I know all the tricks that make it easier. It seems a lot of ladies on here have gone through or are going through similar things and are always willing to lend an ear.

Post # 36
469 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

blahblahgirl:  Not really, a Normal BMI starts at 126 lbs for that height.

Post # 37
668 posts
Busy bee

Hi, bee! First of all, I am so sorry that you’re struggling with this. I’ve struggled with disordered eating for a long time, so I understand where you’re coming from. Remember that you are worthy of love and affection and that you are not a burden for taking up space. It sounds like you need to seek professional help, please do this. Good luck!

ETA: I missed the update, so glad you’re seeing a professional now. That’s fantastic!

  • This reply was modified 3 years, 5 months ago by  pufflehuff.
Post # 38
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

gatordeb:  BMI isn’t really accurate. It doesn’t factor in muscle mass, fat and body type. I also just typed in OP’s height and the weight you just stated and it showed it as being 18.1 which is underweight  so I’m not sure what BMI calculator you are using. 

While I am on the low end for my height, I have a high body fat % and not much muscle. So even though I show that I am almost “underweight” I am clearly not when you see me. 

Post # 39
1548 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

PilotsLocal:  Well first off I just scoped out your pics in your profile and you are beautiful. Stunning for real! What you are seeing is definitely all in your head. Besides professional help all I can suggest is that you throw away your scale. You don’t need one in the house, just be rid of it. You may even feel liberated!

I would also suggest maybe finding another hobby that can take the place of your races etc. Maybe you could get some mild exercise by volunteering at an animal shelter and walking their dogs? I really think a new hobby would benefit you, try to find something that is mentally cahllenging. Best of luck!

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