Post # 1

Member
342 posts
Helper bee
Hi Bees,
My Fiance have narrowed down our venue choices to two. They’re nearly polar opposites of each other, but we loved them both. The first is a nicely decorated, all-inclusive events space that has very ornate (almost overdone) ballrooms. This place gets rave reviews for its food: six hot hors d’oeuvres, buffet with four entrees and a carving station, limited bar (beer and wine), wedding cake, and elaborate dessert table (plus sides, salads, etc.). We’d have to hire a DJ and do lighting, but otherwise, this place has it all — and at a jaw-dropping low price. It gets an average 4.8 out of 5 stars on most websites. But there could be other weddings/events going on (massive space, so we’re not too concerned).
Our other favorite is a mansion at a country club built in 1858. It’s a beautiful white Antebellum-style mansion with fireplaces, a gorgeous grand staircase, tons of places for beautiful photos. The ballroom was the prettiest of any venue we saw, and the pp price includes uplighting. But the food choices are limited: our guests couldn’t choose their entree, so we’d do a paired plate of two entrees. They’d also each get five hors d’oeuvres during the cocktail hour, full open bar, salad, two sides. We’d have to buy a wedding cake, and we did price it with a limited dessert menu of petit fors and Italian cookies.
So as a guest of a wedding, what would you prefer: a party atmosphere that has great food selections, or a more initmate space with limited gourmet choices and great atmosphere? This is for a fall wedding.
Post # 2

Member
355 posts
Helper bee
- Wedding: May 2015 - The Fairmont, SF
As a non-beer/wine drinker, the second options wins by a mile on that alone!
To be honest, from your descriptions, it kind of sounds like you’re a little bit more sold on Option 1. However, I think Option 2 sounds more elegant and what’s included honestly doesn’t sound “limited”. 5 hors d’oeuvres vs. 6 isn’t something that I’d notice and a paired plate of 2 entrees sounds like more than enough. I feel like with all of the food at both locations, I probably wouldn’t even make it to the dessert table… And again, there’s an open bar option! Haha.
I’d go with #2. 🙂
Post # 3

Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
I’d go with #2 for the open bar. I always feel like the open bar brings more of a “party atmosphere” anyways 😉
Post # 4

Member
342 posts
Helper bee
liameowchelle: Thanks for your comment! Actually, both my Fiance and I are leaning toward Option 2. We fell in love with the mansion. But our concern is that our guests would feel limited by not getting an entree choice. That’s why I wanted others to weigh in. This wedding is about us, but we want our guests to feel appreciated. (And lol to the open bar. We don’t drink, but some of our friends/family do, so we of course want them to have drinks, if they want them.) The mansion does offer vegetarian and gluten-free entrees to those who need them. Everyone else will get (probably) chicken and a Maryland crab cake–perfect for a Baltimore wedding.
Post # 5

Member
193 posts
Blushing bee
madmaxshannah: Most of the upscale weddings I have been to recently did not have multiple food options. I feel like people go to weddings to have fun, and as long as they have a full stomach with decent food, no one will think twice about having many options.
Can you post pics of both? You may get more responses that way.
Post # 6

Member
311 posts
Helper bee
I love to boogie! #1 called out to me a lot more. I like the different selections of meals for your guests too.
Post # 7

Member
719 posts
Busy bee
Based on my own personality, I would also go with #2.
To be honest, many weddings have just too much food. Personally, I view over the top cocktail hours and Venetian hours as wasteful and unsophisticated, they don’t impress me with their abundance. Many weddings may have multiple entree choices, but don’t forget that on average wedding food is mediocre at best. How wonderful can this buffet really be?
I’d pick the more elegant, intimate venue that will impress on appearance. Also, you won’t have to worry about the weather because you’ll have a beautiful indoor space to take pictures and your event photos in general will be nicer. The open bar is far preferable to the limited bar, the seated dinner is preferable to the buffet, and the menu has everything you need (5 passed hors d’oeuvres, appetizer, entree, dessert, wedding cake). How much more food can people eat?
It really doesn’t matter, in my opinion, that there isn’t an entree choice. If you’re serving two things on the plate and there’s a silent veggie option, that’s already a lot of choice.
Post # 8

Member
342 posts
Helper bee
anneh1990: Good idea! Frankly, at this point, I’ve made up my mind. I don’t like the “over the top” look Option 1 (Martin’s West) has. Option 2 (Mansion at Valley Country Club) is about $2k more expensive, but makes up for the price difference in its elegance and single-event locale. Both are in Baltimore, MD.
Martin’s West:


The Mansion at Valley Country Club:


Post # 9

Member
448 posts
Helper bee
I ALMOST picked number 1 for the party atmosphere but I ended up picking number 2 because it sounds like the first one is very popular. I don’t like the idea of sharing a space and I actually picked my venue based on that as well. Number 2 sounds great and unique!
Post # 10

Member
4041 posts
Honey bee
I go for elegant all the time. And, I must admit, I go for historic all the time – I’ve been a member of our National Trust for decades. I don’t drink alcohol at all, so that’s not a factor. My daughter just married at a historic venue where they had to transport all the food from another location. They could only offer one entree, and they chose a combo, but could also offer vegetarian (13% took us up on that). Oh, and btw, except for the cocktail hour food spread, I don’t like buffets for weddings.
Having a shared building is a big pain. Shared bathrooms – you never know how much the other party’s guests will be drinking and getting sick; party crashers into your ballroom and the loud boom-boom of the other music are all real turnoffs.
Post # 11

Member
448 posts
Helper bee
oooh after seeing the pictures I see how it’s so tough! Number one looks amazing! But I still think the mansion is worth the 2k based on its exclusiveness and the open bar.
Post # 12

Member
12 posts
Newbee
I think it depends on what your guestlist looks like. If you and your guests are mostly a younger crowd or like more of a party atmosphere then I’d go with the ballroom. If a bit older or just more reserved in general (older relatives etc) then the mansion.
I voted for the Mansion because that’s gorgeous and what I personally like. While the ball room is really nice as well, sharing space with other parties is a “no” for me.
Post # 13

Member
355 posts
Helper bee
- Wedding: May 2015 - The Fairmont, SF
After seeing the pictures, I will say that #1 IS beautiful… The chandelier is simply stunning and, truthfully, isn’t what I’d envisioned when you said “party atmosphere”. But #2 has something about it that’s just timeless. Sticking with my original vote! 😀
Post # 14

Member
1252 posts
Bumble bee
I voted #1. I think the pictures would be amazing. And as a guest, I love having lots of good food. However, #2 seems really nice as well and it seems you already made up your mind. 
Post # 15

Member
719 posts
Busy bee
Oh wow, thanks for sharing the pictures. I 1000% agree with you. Option #1 looks like a gaudy catering hall. It is a very cold space – no windows, whatever cheap flooring that is. Option #2 is warm…sweet porch, smaller rooms, carpeting, fire places.