(Closed) Stuck in the middle of friends breakup

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
5219 posts
Bee Keeper

In this case, I would pick a side. She is out of line, majorly, to the point that it could be harmful to the other person. I would tell her, as lovingly but sternly as possible, to get her shit together– leave him alone and let him move on and advise her to do the same.

Post # 4
2935 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

ChocolateLime:  I think you have to talk to her and tell her, with love, that she is being unreasonable and over the top and that she *has* to stop this behavior. It’s not okay. This is one of those situations when you *need* to speak up. It’s not really choosing a side because you would be doing it for both their sakes.

Post # 5
8786 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Your friend sounds like a huge bitch. Sorry.

I would tell the ex-boyfriend to call the police and file a harrassment report. Because that is absolutely what she is doing and it is unacceptable, regardless of who broke up with who.

Post # 6
11655 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

ChocolateLime:  I agree with PPs and based on what you said I think you do need to pick a side – you need to stick up for him.  She has crossed a line.  Breakups are hard on everyone, she is going way too far in her actions.

Post # 7
5962 posts
Bee Keeper

ChocolateLime:  I would tell your best friend this is why her boyfriend broke up with her.  Clearly he saw the traits and the pettiness she is now exhibiting much more clearly than when they were together.  She’s acting like a child.  I wouldn’t want to date her either.  Tell your friend to do what Westwood said above.

Post # 8
4698 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Your friend sounds immature. I would pick sides. 

People are allowed to end relationships when they want to, that doesn’t give your friend the right to act like an insane bitch to someone she loved for almost a decade. I get pain, but she’s being malicious and needs to stop. I would phone the police if I were him. 

And, if I were you. I’d be picking sides. Easily. I don’t fuck around with people who act the way she is. That’s nonsense and completely disrespectful to what they had together.

Post # 9
1984 posts
Buzzing bee

Pick the guy friend! He needs someone on his side! He told you that he wanted to end his life! He needs someone! And he also needs someonr to tell the girl to leave him alone!

Post # 10
1221 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Time to speak up and tell your girlfriend that she is not handling this well at all and she needs to get her act together. This isn’t so much about picking sides as it is about speaking up when you see someone being treated poorly. She has a right to be upset about the break up, but she does not have the right to harass him at work and make his life miserable and get her friends to gang up on him. I would tell her to grow up and tell him to report what she’s doing.

It seems like you have some insight into the relationship and why things ended. Maybe she needs to hear it from a different perspective to see that it really wasn’t going to last long term. It sounds like they wanted different things, plain and simple.

Post # 13
480 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016

She really is being a psycho EX. It’s not fair to him.  I understand she’s hurt and probably didn’t expect it coming but being flat out evil to the point where it put someone into a deep depression is insane.  I would pick sides. It would be hard to be friends with someone that is harassing someone. She needs to grow up and stop acting like a child. Clearly this is a huge awakening of why he probably left her.

Post # 14
86 posts
Worker bee

She is already escalating it.  He either needs a restraining order or simply to call the police and let them know he’s getting daily threats.  That super sucks that he can’t change his number!

Have you tried talking to her?

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