(Closed) Suck on this Emily Post!

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

Miss Tattoo. Your thoughts bring up a great point. I think that etiquette is meant to not offend those who would otherwise get offended. Though you did not get offended, I wonder if others did? I think it’s great that you are fine with these (hey, I did once buy a couple a board game too, it was on their registry and we’ve played it with them tons before – and once a friend registered for $2,000 sofa in hopes that her parents would buy it for her). I think that we all know our circle of friends, and what would be offensive or not to make our own decisions.

Post # 4
Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@Miss Tattoo: Totally agree. Who cares how other people handle their invites and registries. Just don’t not invite my husband lol. But, you have a good attitude about it all. I think we all get too serious about wedding stuff sometimes and forget to have fun.

Post # 5
Member
1555 posts
Bumble bee

I was actually irritated that there was no registry in the invite I got for the last wedding I attended. It was fmore trouble to contact the couple and wait for a response than it would have been to just include the information to begin with.

Post # 6
Member
10851 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

@Miss Tattoo: LOL! You’re hilarious! To each their own right? I think nowadays our generation doesn’t get really offended by much (ie, I would love to see board games on a registry and even meant to add some to ours but forgot). I think the strict etiquette rules apply a lot more to our parents generations and beyond. I know my mom was horrified when I suggested she host one of my showers, it was very “against etiquette”. She wanted to have it at her house but say a neighbour was a host. It took me about 4 hours of phone conversations to convince her it would be fine to do it herself. Sigh.

Post # 7
Member
404 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Eh. I feel like no matter what I do it isn’t going to be classy or etiquette-y enough, so I’m not sweating stuff too much. It’s pretty hard to offend me, as well.

Post # 9
Member
445 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Amen! I cringe every time I hear the E word!

Post # 10
Member
786 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Ah-GREED. It is such a buzz kill!

Post # 11
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

meh…to each their own.  i think the whole point of “etiquette” is NOT to offend people.  so the whole registry invite thing doesnt offend you, but it probably would offend lots of grandmas and aunties.  and that’s who the ‘etiquette’ is for.  as far as i know, there’s no ‘etiquette’ surrounding what a couple is supposed to register for..i think that falls more into people judging the couple based on the registry.  and i personally am offended when i get invites for showers hosted by the bride.  it is like she is directly asking me for gifts.  i definitely think tacky gets thrown around too much, as well as the notion of ‘proper’ etiquette.  but i also think, when you are hosting a party, you shouldnt make your guests uncomfortable.

Post # 12
Member
2867 posts
Sugar bee

I think it’s more of an issue with older folks.  Our parents age or older that doesn’t like these things.  To keep things civil, I avoid breaking etiquette.

Post # 13
Member
638 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

A.) Love the title of this post!

B.) I am sooo in agreement with you! The whole registry thing just confuses me. Every invite I’ve gotten lately included the registry info, and ones that don’t are irritating because then you have to track down the person who knows while trying not to bother the bride if possible. And I had NO IDEA registering for a board game was not proper etiquette! What in the world would the reason for that be? Isn’t it something the couple will use and enjoy?

Yeesh, I apparently have a lot to learn…

Post # 15
Member
638 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Haha…love the comment about getting rid of towels! Same here, and about a million duplicates of kitchen utensils and other things. 🙂 Times have changed, most of us have a fully stocked house and need to get pretty creative on what to ask for.

Post # 16
Member
563 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I couldn’t care less if a bride included registry information with the wedding invitation.  But it would offend some of my older relatives, and since it is so easy to create a premade wedding website at theknot, I didn’t see a need to include any registry information – I just included a link to my website, which had links to my registry.  Ironically, the only people who have a hard time with this solution are the same older people who are the reason the registry cards aren’t included with the invitation!

 

But MissTattoo – you know your guest list, and are in the best position to gauge whether or not anyone will judge you for including registry cards.  Or you might decide that you don’t care if your great-aunt judges you, in which case you can include whatever you want in your invitation.

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