- 6 years ago
I’m new here and this is actually my very first post. I didn’t know exactly where to put this, but I think I just need to write out what I’m feeling so I can feel a little better so I apologize if this becomes long.
My boyfriend and I (27 and 24) have been dating for about 4 years, 2 of which has been long distance due to his job and my returning to grad school. I love him and I miss him so much so this has been really hard on both of us. Luckily, I have been able to plan my program so that I will graduate in December instead of next May and move in with him,but the next 6 months feels like it will be forever….especially since I’m the one that moved to somewhere that I didn’t know anyone so I don’t have any close friends here.
Anyway, I was never one of those girls that thought about their wedding growing up. I always figured that I’d get married if I wanted to or that we might just be together and never feel the need to actually get married. That all changed last weekend.
My boyfriend came to visit me for the 2nd time in 10 months! It was only for a weekend and we had a good time, but somehow we got to talking about the future. A day after he left, I realized that I don’t want to just live together and that be the end of it. I want to be married. I don’t necessarily need a huge, formal wedding, but I want to be committed to each other.
Since we share everything, the next time I talked to him, I brought it up. I told him that I needed to know if he wanted to get married someday. He said yes of course. I also asked if he had a plan of when we would get married or even engaged and he didn’t. I also asked if he had been secretly saving money for a ring and he said no which kind of hurt my feelings.
I know it’s illogical, but he’s the romantic type and I hoped he had been thinking about marriage more than me since he’s older. I know he doesn’t have a lot of extra money so I’m not expecting anything anytime soon, but I have a feeling that he’s gonna want to get me a very expensive ring since his current roommate is about to get his girlfriend a $10,000 ring (at her request) and he doesn’t like being outdone. There’s no way he’s going to save that much up in the next year or two and I don’t want to wait forever. I don’t know how to explain it but this past weekend something just clicked in my head and now I can’t stop thinking about getting married to him.
Has this happened to other people? Or has come on more gradually? I’m not planning out a wedding or anything yet. I think knowing quite a few people who got engaged in the last year may have played a part, but I’m not the kind of person that would want to get married because it’s trendy.
Thanks for reading!