Post # 1
We’ve been discussing the blocking of Tattoo and then the subsequent shut down of a number of threads in the past 24 hours. I wrote a post on another thread that I think deserves some more discussion and thought with the Hive. Here is what I wrote:
I am a big proponent of “sunlight is the best disinfectant”, and I think we came by the banning decision in a very difficult way. No one wanted it to happen, and everyone has different reactions… human reactions… to it happening.
In addition, what you may not know is that in reaction to the banning, groups started forming on Facebook to talk about the mods and stir up more trouble… so the heavy handed moderation may have been in response to that as well.
I’m happy to keep the threads that are on the boards now open, and if you all like, we can review and discuss the other ones and reinstate them if that’s what the hive wants.
In hindsight, I think that rather than close down commentary, we should have had these tough conversations together with the community and come up with solutions together. How do you all think we should proceed in light of these new attacks? How do you want to proceed with respect to the deleted threads?
Post # 3
Thanks for this and everything else you and the other MOD’s do. I think sometimes people forget that you all are volunteers and do this out of the good of your hearts!
Post # 4
@Mrs. DG: Just wanted to say thanks! I’ve watched the fiasco over the last couple of days and just love that you’re opening up the forum to really get some things resolved.. thanks for being awesome!
Post # 5
I think that a lot of the controversy over bannings/deletions stems from the fact that, when asked WHY someone was banned or a thread was deleted, the basic policy is simply restated (instead of actually pointing out WHAT about a specific thread, for example, violated the ToS). In many cases, it’s difficult to pinpoint exactly what went wrong, so maybe some public discussions before a thread is locked down with a vague explanation would be helpful.
ETA: In other words, don’t just post the ToS. Interpret them for users within the context of the offending thread.
Post # 6
@Mrs Grape: Totally agree!
Post # 8
@Mrs. DG: I think maybe we need a refresher on what kind of behavior is expected on the boards. Maybe in the form of a sticky post…?
And I think that there should be more specific rules on how one gets banned. Like… first offense warning, second offense suspension, and third offense banning. Something along those lines but not necessarily that strict. 😉
I don’t see the harm in posting scathing general opinions… or even scathing opinions toward people in our RL. (Which is what one member did.) When you start making cracks at religion and political views… that’s when it becomes a problem. We’re all adults here. It seems that some need to put on their big girl panties.
And if profanity is the issue, then maybe some filters need to be added that automatically block the offending words out.
Post # 9
@Mrs Grape: I agree too… and I think that we need to work hard to make it clear when we absolutely do need to do something… but I also think we need to be judicious before taking actions and only acting when it really needs to happen and letting you all know the “why?” behind it, insomuch as that is possible.
I appreciate the suggestions! Please keep them coming.
Post # 10
@Mrs Grape: Agreed.
Plus wouldn’t it be easier when someone is banned to put a sort of official “username has been banned” sticky thread? Then everyone knows what happened and get the facts straight up as they are. That way we wont have multiple “Omg so and so was banned?!” threads and people who are completely clueless. I think the reason these things get so out of hand is that nobody knows the full story and they all want to know what’s going on.
Post # 11
I’m fairly new to the Bee and this was my first time experiencing major drama. I’m guessing that this doesn’t happen very often, so people really lack awareness about the procedures and the measures that need to be implemented in de-escalating matters such as this. ( AKA get everyone to act like adults)
We all too often use emotion when trying to tame emotion which never works. Fair is like the color grey, it is interpreted with a spectrum and lacks the clarity of black in white.
Post # 12
@Stellar Magnitude: Yes “big girl panties” needed. Just because one person is offended by a thread or post doesn’t mean it is an offensive post all together.
Post # 13
Sent from my Android
im so upset and disgusted by what is going on lately in the bee…. I don’t even know what to say! In going to have a glass of wine with my Fiance and post on here tomorrow.
What I will say is that there needs to be some serious changes made around here.
Post # 14
I could not agree more with everything being said here.
Every time something like this happens I fear me or someone else who is remotely outspoken may be banned because they have a little more outgoing, abrasive personality and others can’t take it.
Post # 15
First of all, thank you for doing this and love the title 🙂
I think *many* members were unhappy at the deleting of threads and any discussion of the banned posters and the surrounding events. I think it only made it flare-up more because then it came across as no one is allowed to talk about this.
I can’t speak for the other Bees, but I think the threads that have been reopened are the right ones, and in allowing the discussion, things have greatly calmed down.
In all honesty, I feel that Navy_Wife should be reinstated. I feel what she did was out of frustration at not being able to discuss and/or get answers to what was talked about. If it’s true that she did not get a warning, maybe reinstatement under ‘probabtion’ could be a possibility? She’s also pregnant, so pregnant hormones should get a bye 😉
I’d say the same for Miss Tattoo but I feel that is maybe not in the realm of possibility. At this point, the majority of the Hive is aware of what happened and if it’s know that the mods let them back in and they did something ‘wrong’ again, there shouldn’t be any controversy if they were banned.
I don’t really know either of them, but I enjoyed their posts and it makes me very sad that they are gone.
Sorry for the long post but I really appreciate you listening to us re-opening some of the threads. I’m sure this has been a trying couple days for you as well and thank you for trying to make the site a better place for everyone!
Post # 16
@Mrs. DG: I posted this on the “missing miss tattoo” thread, but thought it might get more attention here…
I appreciate your input, and all that the mods and admins do for us all here… But I think the part that is bothering everyone is the fact that we never felt that she crossed the line… and “the line” is very much personal discretion of the mods BASED on the ToS… And maybe her posts did get flagged more than others, but I think it seems to be a general consensus that people are getting flag happy and are overly sensitive… This is a PUBLIC forum and we are (or at least should be) adults here! If you don’t like something don’t read it, if you continually disagree with a certain poster ignore their posts…
I understand that the decision has been made about the recently banned members, but I think a conversation needs to be had as a COMMUNITY about how the direction the COMMUNITY is taking… I think a lot of people are feeling like they can’t voice their opinions or give honest advice, and that is the exact opposite of what WeddingBee is about…