(Closed) Super annoyed with the husband….

posted 4 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

@Daizy914:  I would be furious, but mainly bc I am big stickler for being on time, taking responsiblity, and following through.

If he can’t handle it then work SHOULD be more important.  And putting your family, employer etc in a bind bc you CHOSE to drink too much IMO is just ridiculous.


Post # 4
7220 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

I would absolutely be upset. I might feel differently if he sucked it up and went into work but to call off three times in five months ( especially at a new job) is just downright irresponsible and I would be concerned about what his boss thinks. 


Post # 7
1475 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Wow, I would be livid.

He is a married man, with a home and a FT job, and someday, will have children. I would have done the same thing you did. He has responsibilities and can’t be calling out of work for being hungover! Maybe that was acceptable in college, but not now! I would tell him to grow up.

Post # 9
2947 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Calling out 3 times in 2 months… Yikes! 

I have a very big growly issue about adults working in the adult world showing up to their job on time unless it is completely unavoidable.  I have had multiple co-workers who were unable to do this and they always made me mad.   If my Fiance ever did this once because he was hung over and not sick, he would get laid into the first time.  The second and third times he would be going to work hung over, because his life at home would be worse than dealing with a hang over at work. 

Post # 10
68 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

If he can’t even be responsible for himself, I would have serious concerns about him being responsible enough to care for another person. 

My best friend had a baby with a man who use to call in (often) to work hungover and then she was just home alone every night while he was out with his friends with the baby. 

He couldn’t call into work when she would really need him to (ie sick baby) bc he had used his days/endanger of being fired bc of his excessive hangover call ins. That situation was a nightmare for her and a bad example for their daughter. 

I would have a conversation with him about this TTC or not. 

Post # 11
8487 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2014

@Daizy914:  Yes, I would be mad.

He sounds like a teenager with their first job, or a 35 year old (just putting in a random age) having a mid life crisis.

My mom went through a mid life crisis when she was around 35 and actually went to work still drunk several times. I still dont know how she kept a job.

Post # 12
172 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

@Daizy914:  Yes, I would be upset too. Not because of the going out…well,even though I do think  2:45AM on a weeknight is a tad late. I mean, how could anyone stay out that late and not suffer the next morning for work?

No one wants to feel like a “mother” to their husbands and I would probably feel that way a bit if I were in your shoes right now. First, it’s a bit hard to ask him not to go out so much…that in itself would make me feel really weird. He’s adult and if he wants to go out a few times a week, then he should be able to….However, it’s important that he spend time with you and I would hope that he would want to do that on his own accord. I would feel really discouraged having to ask him to do that 🙁

Next, drinking until all hours of the morning during the week…so bad that he’s calling in sick for work! He’s an adult and I agree, he really needs be more responsible. I would be having a serious conversation with him and I totally think your concerns about your future (when you have a baby) is totally valid. That sh*t would not fly with me!

Do you think because he’s brought the “friend time” down to once a week, he feel like he needs to “go harder” (i.e stay out later and drink more) because he feels “that’s his chance for the week?”

Post # 13
2351 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

@Daizy914:  Did he pull this before you got married? 

Post # 14
554 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Daizy914:  There is no doubt that I would be upset, more like livid! Job security should be one of the most important things in his life! Maybe he should limit himself to going out once or twice a month. When you go out that often you are going to be more prone to drinking and partying too hard. Sorry you are dealing with a man-child right now 🙁

Post # 15
12003 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Daizy914:  I’d be livid.

1 – if I’m hungover, I go to work.  It’s my own stupid fault I don’t feel well, I suck it up and go (not so much an issue now that i work 9-5 m-f but when i worked shift work/weekends a hangover was no excuse)

2- HE’S AN ADULT, grow up.  He should be responsible enough to realize that this is not approproate behaviour.  I would not be happy with him AT ALL.

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