- 3 years ago
I need some advice.
My future father-in-law is the pastor at our Baptist church. I’ve always been a Christian, but my family is a lot more liberal with their beliefs, and it’s been a bit of a challenge to get used to my future in-laws.
For the (June 2015) wedding, we’re going to have a traditional ceremony at our church, and my fiance’s dad is going to marry us. I’m actually really excited about this. But, we’re having some issues with the reception.
I found my dream venue. It’s downtown and completely renovated and industrial looking and it’s just UGH I’m in love with it, okay. Future in-laws don’t like this idea.
1. We were kind of planning on having our reception in the church gym, because my future MIL has been insisting on inviting the entire 500+ congregation. My fiance and I are pretty introverted. The thought of having 500 people watching me get married is kind of incredibly terrifying and panic-inducing and WOWie wow wow. It’s frustrating, not only because of my introvertedness and anxiety, but the fact that my family is paying for the wedding. The venue has 125 maximum capacity.
2. No dancing or secular music on church property. My fiance and I are big dancers, but we DO want a first dance. And I want to serenade my soon-to-be husband with our song. In fact, my FFIL doesn’t like dancing, at all. They’re afraid that us having dancing is going to tarnish his reputation. I’m marrying a PK, after all.
3. Future FIL doesn’t like “silly” stuff. He’s very serious. Extremely (obviously) religious. My fiance and I go to conventions. I perform nerd rock. We like cosplay. We want to incorporate all of this into our reception. I’m so very afraid of offending him and it’s stressing me out and giving me panic attacks and nightmares.
I love my FILs. I really do. And I can’t wait to start my life with my fiance.
What do I do? Do I go ahead with the reception I want and possibly offend some of my in-laws, or do I deal with a reception I DON’T want, but keep them happy? My family told me to stop stressing, that they’d deal with it, but I feel like it’s my problem to handle. I don’t want to tarnish any reputation. I don’t k now what to do. Help.