(Closed) Support needed: C-Section required

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 17
Member
2183 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

Please don’t feel bad. So many of us fear c-sections and feel inadaquate when it’s necessary, but it’s truly not your “fault.”

My little girl is four weeks old, and she was delivered by c-section. Unlike you, I had all the signs of being able to (quickly) deliver vaginally– even though I was induced at 41+2, I walked in the hospital at 4 centimeters, 75% effaced, and she was engaged. My body, though, just wouldn’t cooperate. After 14 hours, I finally got to 10 centimeters, and I pushed for 2.5 hours. She wouldn’t budge. I saw on the monitor that her heartrate wasn’t great, and my temp was going up. 

My mantra was “All I want is a healthy baby and to be healthy for her.” After all the pushing, I called it. I told my doctor it clearly wasn’t working. My worst fear has come true, and I needed a c-section. 

In the heat of the moment, I was so focused on having a healthy baby, I didn’t even feel disappointed, really. My recovery has been fairly simple. I was most pissed that I couldn’t eat solid foods for 24 hours. 

I was still able to do almost immediate skin-to-skin, and we were nursing within the hour. 

I won’t lie– When we got home, I was super hormonal and spent a good chunk of time crying because I felt like I failed. My husband kept saying, “How in the world can you think that? You carried that -pointing to baby- for ten months. She’s healthy and beautiful. There’s no failure there.” Of course he doesn’t understand fully, but it helped. 

Also, it’s no one’s beeswax that you’re having a c-section. My husband told his family I went all natural, and I’m sticking to that with them. My recovery hasn’t been bad. In fact, I’m pretty much back to my pre-preggo size and fully capable of doing almost anything. 

I’m sorry you’re going through this, but it’s really not the end of world. I’ve been there, and I lived to tell the tale– with a beautiful, healthy little girl, too. 

Post # 18
Member
1153 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@KH:  I’m sorry you are going thorugh this! There’s nothing you can do about the way baby wants to position itself & you’e put a lot of good effort into getting baby to turn around. I think what’s most important is that both mom and baby are healthy no matter how baby enters the world. I don’t think you need to share with anyone that you are getting a c-section before baby arrives. You can keep it between you, Darling Husband & any family you choose to share the news with. You also should not feel any negative feelings or guilt because of this. You grew a HUMAN, that is amazing, you are a super hero and you should celebrate that and be SO proud of everything you and your body have accomplished the past 37 weeks. It’s nothing short of a miracle!!! Although a c-section isn’t how you imagined baby getting here at least you know ahead of time and can get yourself ready. I hope you next couple of weeks are very relaxing and that you can enjoy the last days of having your baby growing inside of you! best wishes!!

Post # 19
Member
11744 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@KH:  Well, I’ll be the voice of hope – there’s still time! 🙂  It ain’t over until you’re on that operating table. 

But, having to get a c-section doesn’t make you failure. Agreeing to something for the health and safety of you and your baby makes you an excellent mom already!  I know it’s hard accepting something we hadn’t planned for, but the end result will be your amazing baby in your arms!  Stay positive! 🙂

Post # 20
Member
1119 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2010

The good news is that you know this in advance and are able to avoid an emergency c-section, which is far more difficult to recover from than the planned one you will have.

You will get to the hospital rested because you won’t have labored for who knows how many hours before the trip to the hospital.

You’ll need to get there 2 hours prior to the c-section, and then the actual birth will be 30 minutes. You’ll be able to see your child right away because you won’t be under general anesthesia or, like it was my case with my first birth, so exhausted than you fall asleep in the recovery room before you can hold your child.

Then, recovery is not as bad either. Yeah, it’s major surgery. But because there won’t be labor before, you’ll feel good soon enough if you stick to the pain management plan they give you.

I had both an emergency c-section and a planned one and the planned one was a walk in the park. I wanted a full natural birth before, but honestly, now, I think I’d rather have planned c-sections than a natural birth.

I’m not saying this to bash natural births, but to encourage you and let you know that it’s not as bad as it may seem. You have time to mentally prepare for it, and that’s great. You’ll have a healthy baby that comes into the world in the safest way possible in your own unique situation. That’s everything one could ask for.

Good luck

 

Post # 21
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@KH:  I know it’s scary and you are frustrated, I’ve been there…but put it this way: Would you look at other women (like me!) who had medically required c-sections and think of them as failures or as “broken women”? Of course you wouldn’t…I hope 😉

We are all hardest on ourselves. Just thank goodness we live in a time and place where we have access to such great medical care.

I was induced at 39 weeks due to HBP. After Pitocin, Prostaglandin Suppository, Foley catheter and the manual breaking of my waters over 3 days, I finally went into active labour. After 8 more hrs, baby was stuck sunny-side up with her head wedged in the canal. DH could see the head when I pushed but baby was just not moving.

Because I was so drained from being in hospital almost 4 days and all the pushing, they went right to c/s instead of trying forceps or vacuum. It went so smoothly and was so fast and Dear Daughter was perfect. I was walking around the next morning and using only tylenol and advil for pain & swelling. I couldn’t believe how fast my recovery was and the scar is tiny. I’m not glamorizing a c/s, it is considered major surgery but for me, it was not a bad experience. In fact, if I have another baby, I will most likely have a planned c/s.

The most emotional, scary thing for me was thinking “oh god what if I lived 200 yrs ago or in the undeveloped world or god forbid in the zombie apocalypse like on The Walking Dead…”

Seriously though….go easy on yourself, trust the medical staff, they are so well-trained and on the ball. Good luck sweetie, have a happy birth!

Post # 22
Member
2777 posts
Sugar bee

@KH:  You definitely should not feel like a failure!!! It’s the baby’s fault, not yours (; 

When I was pregnant with my Dear Daughter the dr estimated she would be 10 lbs and recommended that I have a c-section as he did not think she would fit through my birth canal. I took his advice and people still look at me weird when I tell them I had a c-section because she was too big. Don’t let it bother you!!!

I do think that you should emotionally prepare yourself for the recovery and the pain involved. No one really warned me that I would be in so much pain after the surgery and it was a real shock. It was very hard to move around and looking back, I wish someone would have prepared me for that.

Post # 24
Member
3081 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Do NOT feel bad! Your body is amazing and knows what to do. I’m consistently grateful that we live in a time of such advanced medicine, where we can give our babies the best start in life, regardless of how they come out. Everyone will be safer with this course of action that your doctor prescribes, and I’m so glad you trust him/her. 

Post # 25
Member
1420 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

@KH: Has your OB discussed turning the baby by ECV rather than opting straight up for a c-section?  My LO was turned by ECV at 38ish weeks and went on to be delivered vaginally.  Feel free to PM me if you want any info! 

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