- Mrs. Gremmlin
- 6 years ago
- Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium
Please don’t feel bad. So many of us fear c-sections and feel inadaquate when it’s necessary, but it’s truly not your “fault.”
My little girl is four weeks old, and she was delivered by c-section. Unlike you, I had all the signs of being able to (quickly) deliver vaginally– even though I was induced at 41+2, I walked in the hospital at 4 centimeters, 75% effaced, and she was engaged. My body, though, just wouldn’t cooperate. After 14 hours, I finally got to 10 centimeters, and I pushed for 2.5 hours. She wouldn’t budge. I saw on the monitor that her heartrate wasn’t great, and my temp was going up.
My mantra was “All I want is a healthy baby and to be healthy for her.” After all the pushing, I called it. I told my doctor it clearly wasn’t working. My worst fear has come true, and I needed a c-section.
In the heat of the moment, I was so focused on having a healthy baby, I didn’t even feel disappointed, really. My recovery has been fairly simple. I was most pissed that I couldn’t eat solid foods for 24 hours.
I was still able to do almost immediate skin-to-skin, and we were nursing within the hour.
I won’t lie– When we got home, I was super hormonal and spent a good chunk of time crying because I felt like I failed. My husband kept saying, “How in the world can you think that? You carried that -pointing to baby- for ten months. She’s healthy and beautiful. There’s no failure there.” Of course he doesn’t understand fully, but it helped.
Also, it’s no one’s beeswax that you’re having a c-section. My husband told his family I went all natural, and I’m sticking to that with them. My recovery hasn’t been bad. In fact, I’m pretty much back to my pre-preggo size and fully capable of doing almost anything.
I’m sorry you’re going through this, but it’s really not the end of world. I’ve been there, and I lived to tell the tale– with a beautiful, healthy little girl, too.