(Closed) Surprise Wedding- What do you think?

posted 6 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: What do you think about the wedding being a surprise?
    Tell your fiance's parents now, they will be upset. : (26 votes)
    67 %
    The surprise will be fun, do it! : (13 votes)
    33 %
  • Post # 3
    3639 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2015

    You know his parents best (well, he knows them best) and if you think that they are low key then do it!

    Especially seeing as you are having a rececption later too. I can’t see a down side here. 


    Post # 4
    1844 posts
    Buzzing bee

    it sounds like a fun idea, but do you think they are going to feel out of the loop if your bro and mom know but they don’t?

    Post # 5
    9056 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2010

    He’s going to know best how theyd respond. I’m not sure that I’d want to be the only two people that didn’t know it was happening, but I’m kinda anti-surprise in general. 

    Post # 6
    5547 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    I could see it being an issue if this cruise was something special they had planned then suddenly “oh, we are getting married, and you guys are the last to know”. But you know them better than we do. 

    Post # 7
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @chasesgirl:  This was my thought too.

    OP: Do they at least know that you and your family will be cruising with them? If not, you should really tell them that much. They may have a completely different plan for their vacation, so they may appreciate some warning to adjust their expectations to “family vacation” instead of “couple vacation”

    Post # 8
    631 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I think I would tell them. As a Mom, I would want to know. They may want the chance to do little things to make your day even more special for you. His Mom may choose a different dress. I don’t know if this is the kind of surprise I would like.

    The surprise can be for all of the rest of your family and friends when you return.

    Post # 9
    4891 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2018

    He knows his family best, but I think it’s a cute idea! You might want to drop some hints that they’ll need nice clothes, but cruises usually have nice dinners, so they should have them anyway. I would say something about “wanting to do something really special all together” or something like that so they know to expect something. 

    Post # 10
    5428 posts
    Bee Keeper

    They are paying for a cruise, I think they would be kind of surprised that they are actually paying for a wedding. And not in a good way. I would tell them.

    Post # 11
    7771 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I like the idea, but if some people already know- will they feel unprepared?

    Post # 14
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    @Hasellyn:  Oh okay in that case I think it’s okay. You two know his parents best, but try to subtly talk to them beforehand to make sure they won’t feel sad about missing typical or traditional aspects of the wedding or planning process.

    Post # 15
    264 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2013

    If he is their only child, this is their one shot to get to be the parents of a bride/groom. I would recommend giving them the opportunity to enjoy that experience and celebrate it a little bit and not spring it on them at the very last minute. Especially when it (inevitably) comes out that your family knew- I know I would feel pretty hurt to be the last to know. 

    You and your Fiance know his parents best, but I can say the only surprise wedding I know of in real life ended in family drama because some people knew and some didn’t and the MOG cried the entire ceremony. And reception. So be thoughtful when making your decision. 

    Post # 16
    1269 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    If I were them, I’d wonder why I’d be the last to know. 

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