Post # 1
Okay, the wedding is 32 days away. One of my bridesmaids, my sister-in-law, tells me that she is having lap band surgery one week before the wedding. OMG, really!!! She couldn’t schedule it for a week after the wedding (okay, i know a little selfish here).
My sister just had the surgery a week ago and she is barely starting to walk again.
My question is…..
Should I swap out the bridesmaid? We would like someone who will be able to be a part of the festivities. I want to ask my neice Alex to be the replacement. What do you all think?
Post # 3
Shouldn’t it be up to your sister-in-law to decide whether she’ll be well enough to partcipate in the wedding? If you want your niece to be a bridesmaid, ask her to be a bridesmaid, but don’t “swap out” your SIL for someone who’ll be more fun. That’s rude and unfair to your SIL.
Post # 4
She likely won’t be ready to be a bridesmaid a week after surgery. I would speak with her, tell her I understand her decision to take advantage of the surgical date offered to her, but that I would not be comfortable holding her to her commitment to be a bridesmaid.
I would tell her that I was asking her to step down, but hoped that she would be able to attend the wedding even if only for a little while.
Post # 5
I think your SIL would be very hurt if you did that. (i know i would be if i was asked to sit out because i had surgery)
I say dont do you dont want to start your wedding with bad feelings from your in- laws…
Post # 6
I totally agree with you that she should have waited until after your wedding for it!
That is quite mean of her.
I would talk to her and tell her your concerns and ask her what she wants to do.
Post # 7
I wouldnt want to “swap” out for someone more fun, just wouldnt want her to be in pain for the ceremony. We would be doing a lot of things that last week and I wouldnt want her to feel uncomfortable.
Ms. Panda, I see your point. She is actually my brother’s wife…but I still wouldnt want any hard feelings.
Post # 8
WHy would she accept to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man and then schedule her surgery for the week before, i think thats very inconsiderate of her, lap band surgery could wait one more week till the wedding was over. i know someone who had that surgery and it took her a month to be strong enough to socialize and attend parties and weddings.. I doubt your bridesmaid will be able to be in your wedding a week after stomach surgery