Post # 1
I am having a hard time deciding if I want a sweetheart table at the reception or the whole wedding party. I have 6 bridesmaids and my Fi has 6 groomsmen so with all of us it’s a 14 person table. 2 of the groomsmen are married and their wives aren’t in the wedding but thier children are the flower girl/ring barrer. One of the bridesmaids is bringing her husband which wont know anyone there. I would really like to spend the extra time with my bridal party seeing as though 4 of the 6 live out of state. What should I do? Thanks for the advice!
Post # 3
Bridal party estate table! That’s what we did, we had 16 people at ours, flanked by round guest tables. it looked awesome.
Post # 4
- Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley
I chose a sweetheart table simply because I didn’t want to force my bridal party to sit away from their SO’s, and I could NOT fit all of them + their SO’s. As a guest, I would feel awkward if I didn’t get to sit with my SO and knew no one else, so I would never put anyone in that situation.
Post # 5
- Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast
Of your 2 options, I voted for the sweetheart table. However, there is another option for you to think about- a king’s table. It’s essentially a long rectangular table where you can sit with your bridal party and their spouses/children all together. Instead of sitting at the front of the room or up on a platform, the table is situated more towards the middle of the other dining tables, so you are sitting with your bridal party and surrounded by your guests. Just a thought.
Post # 6
We’re doing wedding party (also 6 Bms and 6 Gm). I’ve never seen it any other way so it would be very odd if we did sweetheart or anything. We always sit apart if one of us is in the wedding even if we don’t know anyone. Anyone who can’t sit apart from the SO for an hour has issues.
Post # 7
You could do what some people call a King’s table. It’s a big long table that the whole bridal party and their plus ones sit at. I feel like that’s a nice way to get the best of both worlds. You get to spend time with them but don’t isolate their SO’s if they don’t know anyone.
Post # 8
@Sunshineliz22: We are also having 6 BMs and 6 GMs. Some of the wedding party members are dating each other and the ones whose SOs aren’t in the party are mostly friends or know each other well enough that it won’t be awkward. I agree with the comment about how if you can’t sit apart from your SO for a couple hours then you have some issues. I want my party up there with me because they’re my best friends. The King’s table idea is cool too.
Post # 9
I’m doing a sweetheart table, but we won’t have a large bridal party (just siblings) so that was a factor in our decision. We made the decision based on the fact that at the weddings I’ve been to, the bride and groom are rarely at the table.
When my sister got married, I was her Maid/Matron of Honor. I sat at a table with her, my boyfriend, my sister’s new husband, his best man (brother), and his brother’s girlfriend. My sister and her husband were gone 90% of the night. The rest of the bridal party sat at tables with other guests.
When I was a bridesmaid, we sat with other guests and it was fine.
I have been to a wedding with a large bridal party; the bride and groom did a head table with just the bridal party and then the guests/spouses of the bridal party sat with other guests. The MOH’s boyfriend was at my table – it was hard because he didn’t really know anyone. He was great and social, but that’s still kind of lonely. Also, the long head table made it difficult for the bride and groom to talk to anyone but those next to them. But I love the way it looks!!
Basically – it’s whatever you want! I’ve seen it all different ways. But if you’re going to be talking to all your guests during dinner (that’s our plan), then having everyone at a table with you won’t really help you spend extra time with them in my opinion.
Post # 10
@lovekiss: I’ve seen this before but didn’t know it was a thing/had a name – that is awesome!
Post # 11
Our venue doesn’t allow head tables, so we’re having a sweetheart table by default.
Post # 12
@Sunshineliz22: I did a head table (parents and wedding party only), but honestly it is the one thing I would change about my wedding if I could go back. I would have a sweetheart table (or a table that can fit spouses and kids) or just let the wedding party sit wherever with their families.
Post # 13
If your goal is to spend more time with the bridal party I would do a round table. At a head table you can only really talk to the people right next to you, so it’s not like you would really get to spend time with them anyway. Plus, dinner isn’t usually that long so you can socialize right after! I always vote for a sweetheart table though because Darling Husband and I have both been the lonely guest at a table of people we didn’t know when the other was in the bridal party.
Post # 14
I voted sweetheart because people in the wedding party with spouses/SO’s probably will want to sit together, especially if their spouse doesn’t know anyone else!
Post # 15
It seems like you want to spend time with your party at a head table since they are out of state. I’m in the same situation and made that choice. Most of our party is single and would either bring a random date or no one, which would look odd in pictures. The best man is married, but despite all the cries on here, couples really can survive a meal apart. I don’t really know her very well. As soon as the food is done, no one stays at the table anyways. I would probably sit the children with the spouse not in the party outside of the headtable. I would sit all dates at a table really close to the headtable. I’d probably sit all dates together as they are in the same sort of situation and can bond at that, but if there aren’t enough people for a table, I would just try really hard to sit them with someone that they would get along with (someone who shares hobbies, or maybe just simply a person who is very outgoing and good about including new people into conversations). We are sitting the wive at the “head parents table,” as it is right next to the headtable with her husband, and she knows my fiance’s family. Any other random dates will be sat together. If you do go with the head table- don’t expect them to stay at the table most of the night. Maybe you’ll have a half hour with them before you will have to mingle with guests thanking them for coming. A half hour is a lot when you don’t get to see your out of town friends too often though!
Post # 16
I think that if you’re going to seat everyone at one long table, you won’t be able to spend much time with the people at either end anyway, so I vote for the sweetheart table. (Plus the added benefits of everyone being able to sit with their SO’s/people they know.)
You just have to make sure you visit tables to speak to everyone briefly! Realistically though, at a wedding, your attention will have to be spread thin among everyone. It’s ok! Just make time to hang out before/after. 🙂